Jack Monroe #321 It's just that Jack wasn't especially cool or well liked

[jenny2603]

I'm a bit behind. Did she ever open the box?

She's hiding in it, trying to recover from the shame of having no death threats to show the police.

 

[trueblue222]

She will need to say Polis if she comes to Scotland

She's an absolute banger. She should just piss off and take her fake benedict cumber fucking scotch indy troll account with her the absolute goon

I hope she misses her flight. I'm evil but I
don't care

How the fuck do people want to date her knowing she's a fucking troll of the highest order

 

[WTFDidIJustSee]

Yep! Currently helping my best friend look for a flat and the state of “first time buyer” properties is shocking, attached a floor plan of an entirely wonky flat that is the result of a larger house being butchered and extended. This is going to keep getting worse as the market slows/declines at the higher end and prices of entry level properties increase due to lack of supply (additionally, a lot of flats are cash buyers only due to cladding or open corridors typical of post war council flats being a no go for lenders).

The Patreon saint of poors has no fucking idea what it’s like. My friend isn’t even poor - he has 6 figures in cash savings but is a single buyer on the London avg salary and this is all it gets you, in zone 4. Yet Jacqui is mithering about an orangery and the posh tree/plant I can’t remember the name of? She’s on an entirely different fucking planet.

I looked at first time buyer homes in my hometown last night. £125,000 for a run down, ex council house, on the worst, most crime ridden street on the estate. A few years ago, they’d have been lucky to get £50,000. I despair.

 

[veronica71]

View attachment 1329001

like fuck it was

 

[Jelly Bean]

More boring Gun stuff. The following is about it. While not discounting Jack's account it seems quite a big deal to have it out on the road. I actually now think the gun wasn't even at the street party and that photo is from a different occasion.

Spoiler: Big D's gun

. http://aaronlewisfoundation.org.uk/...rtillery-association-branch-guns-on-the-road/

 

[HotesTilaire]

I dont know if it was this one she was drinking in the photo but she did mention she drinks "old speckled hen" which is low alcohol 0.5%

She mentioned the photo one was Perlenbacher 0.0% she then went on to wax lyrical about Old Speckled hen which is low alcohol

 

[hydeist]

Plot twist: Jack got offered a job at the nick. She'll be teaching the police officers how to cook, and the poor prisoners will be waiting hours through no fault of their own for their slow cooked cup of tea and rinsed beans in gruel

Grunking but I'm pretty sure this would violate the policing code of ethics for human rights in custody

 

[RaeRae]

I feel like someone should buy the domaine name “Vimes boots index” then create a web page to explain that it doesn’t currently exist and that it’s been xx weeks/days/hours since the date promised it would be ready by. At least then when people go looking for it they’ll know the truth.

This is absolutely genius!

 

[Captainmouse]

Is this Jacks half hour a day on twitter? Things seem to be happening awfully fast.

How is it that Jack knows the numbers of random women from her meeting?

It was a typo, she typed on instead of off

 

[Shawads]

Surely it’s to check about reports of huge weapon being fired in residential area?

fify
Too short

Fify

 

[Rekyavikgirl]

Grunking ( been in the bath, innit), but are "welfare checks" a thing in the uk?

Sounds very American

They are. We also call them 'concerns for safety '

 

[Orphan_Black]

If I know anything about bungalow design, it’s that the kitchen is the new office; the hallway is the new bedroom; the bedroom is the new bathroom; ergo, the rug is in the new kitchen in the bathroom. There’s nothing better than having a slice of toast from the non-existent toaster, dripping with lard as she can’t afford butter, while sitting on the loo and Tweeting some made-up shit about the police checking on her welfare

She'll be wearing it next week as a potato sack dress. So gauche, pal.

 

[SamFoxStuckinaCloak]

For me the biggest question is do you pronounce it:

OrANGery or ORINGery?

 

[SweetTransvestite]

...followed by 'tonight I am 'avin Spaghetti 'oops." I love DCI Gene Hunt...

I've love to see Jack try to rinse the sauce of Gene's 'oops because she's feeling a 'bit bluesy with the sads' and wants to make anellini con cacio e pepe.

 

[Smeghead]

On Mumsnet now:

View attachment 1332948

Have you tried blasting it with a cannon, Dear Heart

 

[Sideboard Bob]

Presumably she's tried them as she recommended them

Definitely, but just in terms of accurate mithering, the one we saw her holding on the tank was 0%.

But yeah, that doesn’t take away from how harmful those recommendations were.

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

Prison food is so shit I reckon Jack must be involved already somehow

Nah. They spend too much - it's an average of £13.09 a week per person at an Open prison or £23.87 at a Young Offenders' - she fed 2 adults, one a long distance cyclist, one a bodybuilder and an 11 year old on just over 95p per meal, after all...

 

[Scotty1976]

Howitzer possible you keep getting all these jobs Monroe?

 

[Moon Face]

So PQA is the standard competency-based interview. Meaning there is no way they would ask you to name staff as that’s not in the Job Spec is it? Anyway what if I tell you Bob the cleaner has a secret love child and Doris has gambling debts. How you gonna check?

Bob is the builder not the cleaner. And he talks to his vehicles so I think that would open a much bigger can of worms then a secret love child it is actually Sam with the secret love child, but he is one of their own and everyone knows that anyway

 

[StillLucilleBluth]

“Sheila once said that the chief exec looked like the mum from the Wild Thornberries”*

Stick a fork in me, I’m done