IDK what all this Caledonian Road shit is either. It’s the Cally. Bloody mockneys.May well be wrong, but cockney urchins don’t put ‘The’ in front of ordinary road names. We only use it for The Kings Road, and The Old Kent Road. Randomly The-ing roads in Islington is so posh. Signed, a cockney.
My toothache was so bad I pulled my own teeth out with pliersShe lives her life as if every moment has to be a cover story for Take A Break magazine.
She runs her Twitter feed like a reality tv show. The thrills, the heartbreak, the rows, the villains. It’s all to keep the squids interested and engaged.For a very boring person she's got lots of interesting sounding stories, doesn't she?
IMPRISONED in my own dress. How I escaped its mendacious clutches.She lives her life as if every moment has to be a cover story for Take A Break magazine.
What about the diva suit?I reckon she tried to get her arse into the Westwood. Couldn't hence the drama. Its also really bizarre that she has so many clothes and is suggesting she has nothing to wear to an awards do.
Surely if you knew nothing fancy fitted you you would buy something else to wear.
Welcome to thread 317 of our favourite poverty contrepreneur, Jack Monroe!
Thread title from Frau @Hunsgraveyard and nominated by mithering ninny @Boyo.
I could do a thread recap but I SHAN'T because I am so very TIRED. Send sleepos.
Wiki is the pink button at the top for any new lurkers.
Carry on mithering
Why didn't she wear that suit she bought after the DIVA shoot? That was baggy enough to cope with a few stones additional weight. It looked shit, but let's be honest, so do all her clothes.She's cutting it fine if she's only just cut herself out of a dress! Toot Toot, the train and tube waits for no one, Jack!
Many threads ago I wrote some potential stories that Jack could pitch to Take a Break. Re-reading them has made me realise I’ve forgotten many of these chaoses.She lives her life as if every moment has to be a cover story for Take A Break magazine.
"It was the night of my dreams... until I took a KNIFE to my dress"IMPRISONED in my own dress. How I escaped its mendacious clutches.
Tbf I've got stuck in dresses in fitting rooms and nothing strikes the fear of God into you more.
Saved By My Own ARSE: "I'll Never Diet Again!"Many threads ago I wrote some potential stories that Jack could pitch to Take a Break. Re-reading them has made me realise I’ve forgotten many of these chaoses.
Gun Horror: Walk on the Beach Turned to Deadly Siege
She Left! Ex Stole My Tins and Then My Heart
So Poor I Was Forced to Rinse Beans
Double Trouble: Sofa Company Delivered My Sofa… and then Another One Showed Up!
Forced Out of Job Because of Trouser Allergy
I Walked with a Cane and Now I Run Marathons!
Quick buff over the crotch area with a Dettol wet wipe and jobs a good 'unJust pop your pleather leggings on again, pal. They'll be champion!View attachment 1311019
Ooh I'm so intriguedDELETE - My spoiler went wrong!
Take a Break, reader question of the week. “Am I turning vegan? I’ll lick actual assholes, but won’t eat another sausage.”The cabal have ruined pork sausages for me, I cooked some Cumberland sausages for dinner & I couldn't eat them, I kept thinking of assholes and bollocks and it put me offthis coming from someone who's licked actual asshole so hardly has a discerning pallet
We use cookies and similar technologies for the following purposes:
Do you accept cookies and these technologies?
We use cookies and similar technologies for the following purposes:
Do you accept cookies and these technologies?