You know for someone who allegedly hates the hellsite that is Twitter, she seems to do very well out of it. Hoping the unboxing is this (it would make my day
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Jack Monroe #313 You people are weird
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If anyone reads that tweet and thinks "yes, Jack only uses Twitter for 30 minutes a day, it must be true because she cannot lie", I'm sorry but you have failed at life.
I think it might be her biggest lie yet.
My father had several addictions and that feeling of being less important than them is something that never goes away I have a lot of sympathy for SB, for all he is mentioned on Twitter it is never in a way that celebrates him . I'm constantly surprised by my not so SBs and how they choose to spend their time with friends, quite often walking miles. They change so much in yr7 and it is such a relief when they settle at secondary school. Admittedly I don't mention this on sm, as it's a bit gauche to seem like boasting, but if I tweeted everything else I might!
Forgot to add link!
She has made loads of promises today."I'll post a photo in the morning after I've burned the corner of a tea towel. Now, duck off."
Eta @ChickenPorridge beat me to it
Space squigg unboxing
Pic of the pretend tea towel
Big important meetings
She never seems to do anything fun with him. The only times he's mentioned anywhere fun it's due to someone else taking him and her tagging along like a spare part. Her idea if fun is watching TV one night a week, whilst my kids love a movie night I do in fact do other things with them and never expect them to look after me.
I can see alot of resentment in him when he grows up.
She also promised some squig that she'd post a recipe for the stifado today #nevergonnahappen
15 minutes of morning left.
Open the box, Jack!
Open the box, Jack!
Thank you - I love this clip so bloody much
Sorry, what?
Jack has tweeted 1402 times in the last 30 days.
She ragetweets, searches her own name, starts pile ons, shares slop photos, makes promises she'll never keep, breadcrumbs about OH, posts inane polls about sandwich fillings and shopping days, writes idiotic takes about the government, reports on her latest health crises, rattles the tip jar, rants about That Man, and threatens lawsuits...
...in 30 minutes a day.
Riiiiiiiiight.
1402 tweets in 30 days is an average of 46 tweets a day.
46 Tweets in 30 minutes is on average one every 1.5 minutes.
#BigForensicMathsFacts
Hopefully she does mean Sunday, Liverpool are playing Real Madrid in the champions league final today & she’s a massive jinx for them.
Sounds like an illegal ADHD remedy!
More seriously, I think it's to do with people solving Rubiks Cubes as fast as possible.
My maths are as dodgy as Jack's for the record, I've miscalculated somewhere me thinks.....
Isn't 46 times in 30 mins 1.5 tweets per minute?
Thank you! I had just quoted myself like a twit because I realised I'd fucked up. Thank you for fixing my idiocy!
Cu Cu Thunder, you the real Big Maths MVP
If she hasn't opened the box by the end of today I am handing in my membership and asking Space Squid directly. What. Is. In. The. bleeping. Box?
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