Jack Monroe #292 Poet, philosopher, fighter, cook, hero

Status
Thread locked. We start a new thread when they have over 1000 posts, click the blue button to see all threads for this topic and find the latest open thread.
New to Tattle Life? Click "Order Thread by Most Liked Posts" button below to get an idea of what the site is about:
Time to gather up those hunks of bread and recap what we know about Harold:
Access to guinea pigs
Big car
Brass mugs
Brother with chickens
Burgles Jack's clothes
Chooses unsuitable Lego
Dismissive of 90s fragrances
Doesn't drink alcohol
Not on social media (except reflection in photo posted by Jack)
Owns a spatula
Skilled at making cake boards

And what we still don't know:
Whether real or figment of Jack's imagination
Just wanted to say that SB'S dad does not have a brother.
He has a sister and BiL, but no brother.
I think we can officially cross him out in the Harold sweepstakes, although my money was on him being Harold.
 
  • Like
  • Haha
  • Heart
Reactions: 56
Someone has tagged one of TD’s mates lol
Jack should be very careful here, as a lot of food writers have really put a lot of time and effort into Food for Ukraine over the last five weeks and helped to raise funds and awareness, while Jack has done precisely nothing, not even a retweet. If the person tagged in happens to have written several books about travelling and food in the region (Black Sea, Red Sands ... ) this will not end well for Jack.
 
  • Like
  • Heart
  • Wow
Reactions: 81
On a grunk (these threads are so FAST) so sorry where this lands...but considering she 'apparently' has starving OAPs and single dads contacting her for help getting food, it's really bad form to be bragging about bedtime snacks, giant 2am sandwiches and seconds of dinner...like knock yourself out Jack eat what you want but keep your supposed audience in mind. I bet they wish they could be so bleeping poor if they actually existed.
 
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 67
Nice. ETA. Deleted already.
View attachment 1213741
Reader, I gasped!! It takes a lot these days, but I just had to actively make a decision to close my mouth. I am shooketthhhhhh!! She’s gone for Jamie, AGAIN 😮

She’s such a spiteful little prick. I tell you what, say that to Nigella about Nigellissima. I double dare you, Jack, you bleeping cretin. This, says the bleep who just bastardised stroganoff! Is this my aneurysm??
 
  • Like
  • Haha
  • Heart
Reactions: 101
Could OH (if real, of course 🥸) be Polish? Would explain the Polish sausage she now has in every meal, buying lots of random animal parts for stews and harping on about being into that geographical region.
That's a good call. But we've never heard any more about the leg of goat, 2 hearts, 12 trotters and that other assorted 90% vegan nonsense in the backpack. We're back to cheap sausage and mushroom slop. I'd be genuinely interested to know what you could do with a dozen pig's feet. Not something I've ever tried, but Jack seems to have gone sheepish (sorry) about it.

ETA: I'm turning myself inside out over the apostrophe in pig's. Can't work out which side of the 's' it should go. I think I got it right, otherwise it's referring to a dozen pigs. Only got E grade english at A level and it was a very long time ago. Never had to write anything down for a living. Fair play to Jack though. She's come a long way with her qualifications. Newcomers, see the Southend English Jactionary in the Wiki for evidence.
 
  • Haha
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 38
Status
Thread locked. We start a new thread when they have over 1000 posts, click the blue button to see all threads for this topic and find the latest open thread.