I'm pretty lax about use by dates if I'm honest, but out of date mozzarella in brine really needs throwing away as it's disgusting.
Jack Monroe #292 Poet, philosopher, fighter, cook, hero
- Start date
-
- Tags
- Jack Monroe Threads Wiki
- Status
New to Tattle Life? Click "Order Thread by Most Liked Posts" button below to get an idea of what the site is about:
Maybe she will find out liverpool won the premier league in 2020 and send out congrats soon!
We could work out way through this list and suggest allsorts of deliciously vile recipes
Attachments
Effluvia de Porcine from Adjikistan does have a whiff of Jack about it.
Someone has tagged one of TD’s mates lol
Is she taking the actual piss?? Stroganoff is Russian, but from Odesa which is now part of Ukraine as I understand it. I’m sure she’s doing this to trigger a Squig into saying this, so she has an excuse for a pile on?
Beef stroganoff is simple and delicious, but you swap an element out and I’m afraid it is a stroganoff no longer. All she had left of it is mushrooms!
Re portion sizes - per her costings, we’ve got 1 + 2/3 of a sausage per person, 50g of mushrooms (which is three!!), and 50g of rice, which is a very small portion. I personally portion rice at 75g per person, and that’s with proper sides with huge amounts of veg and protein. Her portions are dangerous and disingenuous, all to keep to her ridiculous budget that she doesn’t even need to follow.
Don’t recall mozzarella in the stock take, and it’s ok to let it rot and go to waste, eh Jack?
Beef stroganoff is simple and delicious, but you swap an element out and I’m afraid it is a stroganoff no longer. All she had left of it is mushrooms!
Re portion sizes - per her costings, we’ve got 1 + 2/3 of a sausage per person, 50g of mushrooms (which is three!!), and 50g of rice, which is a very small portion. I personally portion rice at 75g per person, and that’s with proper sides with huge amounts of veg and protein. Her portions are dangerous and disingenuous, all to keep to her ridiculous budget that she doesn’t even need to follow.
Don’t recall mozzarella in the stock take, and it’s ok to let it rot and go to waste, eh Jack?
I'm so ashamed. Out of the corner of my eye I read that as "THAT MAN's slop".
Late to the party, but...
Constituent: Excuse me, Mx Monroe....
Jack: I'm BUSY
Handy tip. Save yourself the trouble of turning your boxes inside out by not turning them inside out.
And mushroom bollocks stroganoff. 42p per portion, but you're going to eat it all yourself, so £1.26 per portion.
This business with people searching online for the Vimes Boots Index has me in stitches. It's all just mad. How can anyone take her seriously?
Could OH (if real, of course 🥸) be Polish? Would explain the Polish sausage she now has in every meal, buying lots of random animal parts for stews and harping on about being into that geographical region.
Mozzarella?!? She must have the constitution of an ox, if I lived on old cheese, meat and salad I'd be dead by now 
I need some help with my maths homework guys as I am clearly not a gifted genius....
Here's the question that stumped me!?!?
= 63p
+ instant mash + cabbage + peas = 64p
We know the whole cabbage cost 50p
How much do the instant mash and peas cost?
How much cabbage can we use to keep it within budget?
Here's the question that stumped me!?!?
= 63p + instant mash + cabbage + peas = 64p We know the whole cabbage cost 50p
How much do the instant mash and peas cost?
How much cabbage can we use to keep it within budget?
Attachments
Last edited:
he was my favourite on ready steady cook, him and Nick Nairn and Brian Turner. (I’m like Bruce Forsyth - you’re all my favourite)I met him on holiday in Menorca about 7 years i ago. I’d taken my 3 kids (single mum) and they were all under 10 at the time, he struck up a conversation saying he thought I was brave for holidaying alone with 3 kids. He was lovelyI might get this book just to spite Jack
Exactamondo, it is not like we are avoiding animal products and a small pot of single cream would be a similar price. In fact I would far rather have a mushroom stroganoff and forego the cheap sausages for a few chestnut mushrooms. We just had kidney bean and potato curry , Fraus it was lush, they were the main ingredients with onions and storyboard spices. Jack probably has everything in but maverickly wouldn't cook the onions and cumin seeds for long enough before adding anything else
Veiny Bollock Index Jack I *think* is my favourite Jack. She is so out of her depth it is hilarious. She commited to this stupid thing and now has to see it through But she can't .
All the bluster at the beginning about how easy it was and would take her a weekend. Experts were twats for not doing it properly. She would show them. Many months later absolutely duck all to show for it and the most snivelling whiney excuses.
I would put money on her having done precisely nothing towards it and was hoping people would forget all about it.
ETA Bearing in mind Nigella {boo hiss} flagged up this vital work and encouraged people to back her financially so she could work on it.
But she can't .All the bluster at the beginning about how easy it was and would take her a weekend. Experts were twats for not doing it properly. She would show them. Many months later absolutely duck all to show for it and the most snivelling whiney excuses.
I would put money on her having done precisely nothing towards it and was hoping people would forget all about it.
ETA Bearing in mind Nigella {boo hiss} flagged up this vital work and encouraged people to back her financially so she could work on it.
Over 100 cook books and she still can only serve brown slop.
The mind boggles.
Have spent almost 10 hours of today on the road so I’m way behind, however I’ve seen Jack’s stroganoff on Twitter & have only one question; what’s the budget for Rennies to go alongside these dishes?
squig: I'm gonna make it but can't call it stroganoff and gonna sub things and leave things out anyway
can't wait for the Other Plans for the cabbage! and, will it duck
can't wait for the Other Plans for the cabbage! and, will it duck
People are suggesting some delicious sounding food on her thread and posting pictures of colourful and appetising dishes...soon we will have the tragic versions produced by the Queen of Slop. Enough to make a foodie weep
…Or, as we call them in the Midlands
, storage boxes. IT’S LITERAL RUBBISH. I feel like she must have a serious hoarding issue. She has to.
Jack's last tweet there has put me in mind of someone summoning a demon
Most of them will be on this tier as a minimum. We keep saying '£2.5k a month' from patron but this is the absolute minimum. Most (like 99%) will be higher than that. My guesstimate is £5k a month. A more mathematical frau ( @heretoreaditall2019 ) might give a better guesstimate .It might have been pointed out already, sorry if so, but did the person who tweeted about the Patreon say they were on the £12 a month tier?
- Status