Jack Monroe #240 Schwankend

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traumatised sideboard

There are so many Jacks. A veritable plague of Jacks. Just when you think you've exhausted the list, more pop up like peeky minks.
 
Reactions: 38

skronkywildcat

which Jack is the very worst?

For me it was headscarf breadcrumbing Jack. Heartless and rotten.
 
Reactions: 57

Django

Oh mate, this is fab, but rubbish on the scale of our wee Jackie's ailments
ADHD (severe)
Alcoholism
Allergies- tomatoes, onions and shellfish
Anaphylaxis
Anxiety
Arthritis (severe)
Asthma
Autism
BFRB
Borderline diabetes/hypoglycemia
Broke 46/47 bones in her foot
Broken ribs
Broken toe
Burnout (severe)
Chilblains
Concussion (severe)
Covid 19 and long Covid
Depression
Disfigured legs
Distended ribs
EDS
Eye injury (see @BeautifulTrauma )
Fucked up lungs (death rattle)
Hair loss
Hay fever (severe)
Heart problems
Heart attack
Hypersensitivity (wrists)
Immuno compromised
Lactose intolerant
Mouth ulcers and ouch mouth (severe)
Panic attack
Poor mental health
Port wine stains
PTSD
Scarring
Sexual abuse
Sinusitis (chronic)
Sprained shoulder
Sprained thumb (washing up injury)
Splinter (severe)
Stutter
Trauma
Weakened knees
Whiplash

The 'jobs' list is even more fantastical.
 
Reactions: 61

Captainmouse

Veronicaaa said:
You'd be better off listing the non-Jacks, it would take less time. For example

Fantastic cook Jack

Successful household budgeter Jack

Always completely truthful Jack
Click to expand...
Nice, nice is definitely missing from list of non mackies
 
Reactions: 20

GoLando

skronkywildcat said:
which Jack is the very worst?

For me it was headscarf breadcrumbing Jack. Heartless and rotten.
Click to expand...
This actually took my breath away. I’m normally here just laughing at how other people see what a dickhead she is. But that was like a punch to the gut.
 
Reactions: 45

ChickenPorridge

Fruitjack said:
Wild garlic Jack was a ride.
Click to expand...
This has reminded me of eucalyptus Jack. She hung a bunch in her shower, posted pics promising to let everyone know how it went/how effective it was - and shockingly - we never heard about it ever again
 
Reactions: 49

PsychicCaramel

Noticed she said ‘lived rough’ rather than slept rough, so if questioned on it she could point out ‘that’s not what I meant, now fuck off’ in her usual charming manner. I don’t think the choice of words was accidental though, she knew how it would read.
The infamous Jif lemon also makes an appearance in the article if you’re looking for some light relief. Also the rinsing of spaghetti hoops because obviously.
 
Reactions: 40

Rekyavikgirl

Fugue State Jack. Three Heart Attacks Jack. Allergic to onions Jack. Canker sore Jack.
 
Reactions: 30
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