Jack Monroe #236 You absolute whelksplat!

[colouredlines]

Jack claims that her "not meatballs" are adapted from an Abel & Cole recipe. I found the original - who wants to play spot the difference?

Original:

Jack:

"adapted" is such a strong word...

 

[Ispyabudgetbeanblogger]

I've spent too much time trying to work out how to grate fresh bread. Does she mean sliced bread on a box grater? How on earth would that work?

Eta: just read @colouredlines post. She's adapted the method from something that looks like it would work to something that wouldn't. Also removed most of the flavour by reducing amount of garlic and olives (and making them optional). She's monroed the tit out of that recipe.

 

[karenina]

Love thi - everything from the original tweet damning with faint praise, to the vague advice (tbsp of flour used how?) to the passive aggressive kiss at the end.

The kiss makes it. I daren't look in case the squiggle has responded with gushing praise and thanks for this generous pearl of wisdom!

Jackie is making it up on the hop. She really is so high on herself. If they need to be chilled for an hour that should have been in the recipe not tossed into the ether years later . Every single recipe I've seen on here is wrong almost on a line by line basis and just ripe for an extended prac crit exercise. from a food angle and a psychological one too.

 

[colouredlines]

I've spent too much time trying to work out how to grate fresh bread. Does she mean sliced bread on a box grater? How on earth would that work?

Just like you would grate mushrooms or corned beef* dearheart x

* acceptable for 90% vegans

 

[karenina]

Spot the difference. Aubergines in chunks not small dice. Makes total sense - in opposite land. And don't blend the whole mixture. Again - in topsy-turvy land this makes sense.

 

[Ispyabudgetbeanblogger]

The kiss makes it. I daren't look in case the ssquiggle has responded with gushing praise and thanks for this generous pearl of wisdom!

Jackie is making it up on the hop. She really is so high on herself. If they need to be chilled for an hour that should have been in the recipe not tossed into the ether years later . Every single recipe I've seen on here is wrong almost on a line by line basis and just ripe for N extended prac crit exercise. from a food angle and a psychological one too.

I wish someone would respond with the original Abel and Cole method to the squiggle.

 

[ThunderClapForCapers]

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At 64, it is either George Michael Daddy issues or she is on manoeuvres.

Jack Monroe + Wealthy, high profile and hugely successful Central London restauranteur in their late 30s. What could possibly go wrong?

 

[Orphan_Black]

Jack claims that her "not meatballs" are adapted from an Abel & Cole recipe. I found the original - who wants to play spot the difference?

Original:

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Jack:

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"adapted" is such a strong word...

That is outrageous!

(She's also 'so poor' to be subbing to Abel&Co! Talk about an expensive way to get groceries!)

 

[colouredlines]

Also I only just noticed that she wants you to cook black olives until they "brown and soften".

Has she ever actually met an olive in real life?

 

[DinosaurSenior]

It grates my stale slices when people say "love you" to people they barely know.

 

[Brian Butterfield]

It grates my stale slices when people say "love you" to people they barely know.

Love this, love you xxx

 

[FlirtyThirty]

i have to counter this just to say chickpea jizzum is actually perfect for vegan aioli! just 2 tablespoons whizzed up with garlic, oil, salt and a squeeze of lemon

I can see that being nice! I don’t actually have anything against Aquafaba or veganism I’m just a witch Chickpeas do give me terrible gas though

 

[ecdb]

Jack claims that her "not meatballs" are adapted from an Abel & Cole recipe. I found the original - who wants to play spot the difference?

Original:

View attachment 963080View attachment 963081

Jack:

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"adapted" is such a strong word...

the cheek of this! She’s basically just plagiarising their recipe (again, not new to the veterans I’m sure).
It’s like buying knock off gucci from a high street shop where they have to make like three subtle differences so that they can’t get sued for copying the original.

 

[MaineCoonMama]

I can see that being nice! I don’t actually have anything against Aquafaba or veganism I’m just a witch Chickpeas do give me terrible gas though

My friend and I have an ongoing text message thing about sending each other 'chickpea pop-offs'. He'll clear the kids out of the lounge and off to bed with his stank.

 

[Vanelope]

At 64, it is either George Michael Daddy issues or she is on manoeuvres.

View attachment 963088

Jack Monroe + Wealthy, high profile and hugely successful Central London restauranteur in their late 30s. What could possibly go wrong?


View attachment 963124

I follow and a bit love him (his food!) - he’s the Pie Man and chef at fancy Rosewood hotel and got married not long ago and his main lady associate chef could dice Jack like aubergine. No clue he was in recovery. Props to him.

 

[Powershower]

There was mention of a trip to the vet and some terrible events around the time of the burglary i think.

On a lighter note, I found this in her old insta posts (we are away and Mr F is still snoring). Surely, everyone, since time began, just swills some water around in their washing up bottle when it gets close to the end? View attachment 963066t

We all know your dishes are not sparkling. Your sinks dirty too

 

[ThunderClapForCapers]

I follow and a bit love him (his food!) - he’s the Pie Man and chef at fancy Rosewood hotel and got married not long ago and his main lady associate chef could dice Jack like aubergine. No clue he was in recovery. Props to him.

The Pie Room book is excellent and he has managed to find a great niche in such a competitive industry. Maybe it could've been a meeting of minds.

 

[Powershower]

Also I only just noticed that she wants you to cook black olives until they "brown and soften".

Has she ever actually met an olive in real life?

I’ve heard she’s dessicated a few

 

[Raker]

I’ve heard she’s dessicated a few

It’s not time for that effing Gorgonzola semifreddo monstrosity again is it?

 

[Ispyabudgetbeanblogger]

Gawd, just noticed the herb swap in the recipes.

Abel&Cole : handful if basil or tbsp rosemary (makes sense, both Italian vibes, rosemary is much stronger and sturdier than basil, so less required)

Jack: fistful of parsley, coriander, mint, basil or whatever you fancy. What???? I'll allow parsley, but mint? In meatballs? Or coriander to serve on spaghetti with tomato sauce? wtf is wrong with her?