Oh my god.
SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP.
Jack Monroe #202 All of my spoons tell stories
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SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP.
Doesn’t blended family imply that they are together? It’s tricky wording again.
Blended family but can't blend your eyeshadow.
How I wish a baby crab had come out of one of the shells and given her a wee nip on the digits. I don't know about you guys but we were always told to leave rocks and shells alone at the beach, not a good idea to move things around like that.
Soz Moo!
I know, it's awful. Answering all the questions posed here after the last fishing expedition. Just go on holiday. I hate these two phrases with a passion but Jack needs to:
Be present
Make memories
Jack does not need to post more drivel on social media. (Just my opinion, your honour)
Fingers crossed for a full-blown Religious Revival Preacher Jack 
Anyone willing to join her as a Slopostle?
Anyone willing to join her as a Slopostle?
Hippy Crack Jack is the scariest incarnation yet. One question (of so very many). "Let God and let be" let God what??? As a humanist am I missing something. More incomprehensible nonsense from the newly spiritual one!
Imagine the ten commandments of the divine order of slopFingers crossed for a full-blown Religious Revival Preacher Jack
Anyone willing to join her as a Slopostle?
Attachments
Let go and let God is an AA quote. We had the sticker on our fridge when I was a kid. ( My Mum was treasurer of our local Al-Anon chapter most of my life)
So SB’s dad had 4 to look after on this holiday?
Christ, those poor kids, being terrorised at the very thought of kicking over dear MamaPapa's beach art.
Well at least if they were trying to kick over Jack’s circles in the sand, they weren’t in the sea with the ONE adult looking after them all. The siblings are younger AFAIK. But you go and make sand art, hun.
I'm back from my holidays too! I was on Instagram a little but that's about it. Mainly just enjoying it, it was my birthday on Monday 
Lovely to have a morning catching up with you all. Hilarious as always 
Lovely to have a morning catching up with you all. Hilarious as always One of the Fraus will bake you a belated cake!I'm back from my holidays too! I was on Instagram a little but that's about it. Mainly just enjoying it, it was my birthday on Monday
The Slop Commandments
1. Thou shalt fudge your costings depending on the context of who's questioning them.
2. Recipes are to be simultaneously "one and done" and "tested by three home economists"
3. All food is to be the consistency of slop and predominantly brown unless it is cake which should be brick like and dry.
4. Grifters gonna grift.
5. Thou shalt not worship false idols unless they are facetuned and posing provocatively on a sideboard in washed out underwear.
6. Thou shalt not covet thy neighours soap.
7. Thou shalt revere the origin story of the pov.
8. Potatoes.
9. Thou shalt worship at the altar of the Cotswolds sideboard.
10. Thou must adhere to the double denim dress code.
In the beginning was the word. That word was shan't
On the Sabbath all true worshippers will partake of a piss and a sandwich
Under her black eye. Blessed are the slow cookers.
Edited cos auto correct doesn't like thou!
1. Thou shalt fudge your costings depending on the context of who's questioning them.
2. Recipes are to be simultaneously "one and done" and "tested by three home economists"
3. All food is to be the consistency of slop and predominantly brown unless it is cake which should be brick like and dry.
4. Grifters gonna grift.
5. Thou shalt not worship false idols unless they are facetuned and posing provocatively on a sideboard in washed out underwear.
6. Thou shalt not covet thy neighours soap.
7. Thou shalt revere the origin story of the pov.
8. Potatoes.
9. Thou shalt worship at the altar of the Cotswolds sideboard.
10. Thou must adhere to the double denim dress code.
In the beginning was the word. That word was shan't
On the Sabbath all true worshippers will partake of a piss and a sandwich
Under her black eye. Blessed are the slow cookers.
Edited cos auto correct doesn't like thou!
Confirmation that Jack's idea of "back to work" means posting stuff on instagram.
We are in for it now aren't we Fraus? A bleeping DELUGE of pent up narcissism.
God, I hope not
Is there even a Pleasure Beach in Suffolk?
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