Back once again with the thread title nomination outrageous grifting dirtbag.
Jack Monroe #169 Please don’t argue about turnips
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Bringing it back from the last thread
Thread title nomination
Live, Laugh, Grunka
Thread title nomination
Live, Laugh, Grunka
And my next tattoo. Sweeet.
I have taken the liberty of editing one of her photos from a few years ago and editing it with some more skills. It is crappy but I’ve been BUSY.
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It's a surprise. If it looks and tastes edible then you have done it wrong
I love you x
Grunking but I once shared a cigarette with Bob Hoskins...does that make me Jessica Rabbit?
(In my dreams
)
(In my dreams
)
And it shows......
Give her a second series, ya swine!
Whoever said there are probably plant tips going in the book is bang on the money. It is absolutely Jack to consider herself an expert on something she's just decided to hop on the bandwagon of or dip her big toe into. Just like she did a spread in the paper about beating alcoholism a week after giving up drink.
The hashtag for the event suggests the panel discussion (ie the part that involves Jack) is on now. Still no promo of it from her other than liking someone else’s tweet hours ago
I’m guessing my agent told them NO as I was taking a break from my TV and dancing career.Bet you turned down Strictly, too
Just popping in to say I see (horse) CHIS went viral the other night!
I really wish someone would write a realistic cookbook though:
"I look back wistfully on the days of my youth when I would camp down on the library floor, cook books scattered round me, while I leafed through the varied pictures of inspiration from across the globe. I had someone to impress, a romantic night planned, and a Saturday morning perusing the local butchers and greengrocers for ingredients. My imagination could run wild and, at the end of it, I would likely get laid.
Ah, sweet memories as I peel myself away from my emails to ponder what I can rustle up tonight...
Here's my recipe for when you've worked late, the kids are being shits, and you just cannot be bleeping arsed:
1 - bottle of wine
1 - second bottle of wine (never two bottles, always one and one)
1 - Chinese menu
1 - £10 note
A handful of loose change
Generously glug the wine into the largest possible glass.
Adopting a stern tone, briskly shake the menu towards the children and announce "PIE" and give them a glance that ensures no dissent.
Leaf through the remaining menu before settling on your usual choices.
Call, to be met with "is this XX Bland Street Name? Usual?"
Gently shake loose change while watching the clock.
Serve indelicately tipped onto your biggest plate and enjoy with a fork and tit tv."
TED talks are pretty much complete tit anyway, they're so cultish and full of people who seem to think they're Steve Jobs. You have to be a licenced speaker or some nonsense to do them and it seems to attract the sort of people who are proud Twitter blue tickers. Aren't TEDx the shitter version? Like it's basically a podcast with some extra branding?
I’ve helped.
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Her fans might actually watch it and realise what a gobshite she is.
It die. I cry.
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