Jack Monroe #155 What a sad little life, Jack

[JuliaGulia]

Also, pretty sure her noodles are king soba black rice noodles (most other black noodles aren't vegan). They are around £2.50-£3 per 250g, so not cheap. We sometimes get them because they are tasty and gluten free (gf husband). There are two ways of making them look and taste great. Either boiled, then rinsed and dressed lightly in a sesame oil and soya dressing, sprinkled with sesame seeds as a noodle side dish or boiled,rinsed and added briefly to a very bright stir fry of greens like bok choy, snow peas, water spinach, etc. Topped with spring onion and red chilli. The bright green and red looks great against the black.


Fun fact: 100% of dishes are vegan until you add animal products to them.

Harry, that sounds delicious. I've bookmarked it for future use!

 

[Veronicaaa]

I'm just going to say it - disgusting slop Jack is my favourite Jack. It's never not hilarious.

 

[Fruitjack]

I've been talking to some guy through the apps and he said he was making himself a nice dinner tonight. I asked what he was making. The response: "Hamburger with egg, pasta, cheese and salad." This isn't actually that weird here. Jack should move to Portugal, where random things are put together and strong flavour is lacking.

ETA: He sent a photo and it looked even worse than imagined.

you going for it though?

 

[JuliaGulia]

I'm just going to say it - disgusting slop Jack is my favourite Jack. It's never not hilarious.

Yep. I feel like those posts have big 'This will show them...' energy.
She showed us. She really did!

 

[Fruitjack]

I only see Mr F at weekends at the moment and our Saturday morning routine is now that I wake up early and catch up here and he wakes up and without even opening his eyes says ‘what’s she done now?’. He still probably couldn’t pick her out of a line up but it has just really made me chuckle.

 

[kachoochoo]

celery, southend

I'm sorry

 

[MaineCoonMama]

Eurgh. MCDad just asked what's for dinner.

I said I'm fine, my love. I'll get something later.

I really have waterfall mouth looking at that.

 

[Fruitjack]

I only see Mr F at weekends at the moment and our Saturday morning routine is now that I wake up early and catch up here and he wakes up and without even opening his eyes says ‘what’s she done now?’. He still probably couldn’t pick her out of a line up but it has just really made me chuckle.

Normal routine has continued, he’s slithered over all amorous and I’ve just gasped ‘she’s BOILING mushrooms’ and he’s slithered back.

 

[TriviaNewtonJohn]

Normal routine has continued, he’s slithered over all amorous and I’ve just gasped ‘she’s BOILING mushrooms’ and he’s slithered back.

You need a Real People article

JACK MONROE'S SLOP SEX STEAL

 

[Bobsmum]

The perfect example of how she changes her appearance to fit in. There is no way I would wear an almost exact copy of my partners clothes the way Jack does in this photograph. I have my own style and he has his.

She really doesn't know who she is, does she? Searching without success to find a style that she is comfortable with.

I think she’s actually seems/looks the most comfortable in ‘normal, expected gender’ clothes, but she can’t accept that and thinks that she needs to be ‘different’ it’s why whenever she tries another style it looks like cosplay, ....... obviously people can pick and change their style, I have a friend who is truly a style chameleon, and they look comfortable whatever they are wearing.

 

[GoLando]

You can't just empty the contents of your cupboard into a bowl you bleeping berk.

This, minus the bleeping, for next thread title

 

[LennyBriscoe]

celery, southend

View attachment 457883

I'm sorry

 

[SamFoxStuckinaCloak]

Good point- I forgot about her bread making habit! She probably has a fridge for all her starters like all those horrid scobys we heard about

But isn’t it more fun to think she only gets posh bread from Waitrose and Ocado?

She definitely thinks that “bread in a bag” is some kind of symbol of being working class.

 

[moosesauna]

She definitely thinks that “bread in a bag” is some kind of symbol of being working class.

TFW everyone who doesn't shop regularly in Waitrose is working class

 

[Veronicaaa]

She definitely thinks that “bread in a bag” is some kind of symbol of being working class.

`Now saying 'Bread? in a Bag??' to the tune of 'TRAAZERS? on a bird??'.

 

[onlysunshine]

Baggy trousers didn’t start the fire?

I don't know if this has been suggested yet but putting this in for thread title nomination

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Just caught up, oh my days! Well she's right, she did come back with a bang. Nothing like a full moon cookathon ay?!

 

[ThriftStoreLeCreuset]

you going for it though?

Only so I can report back here.

 

[bowiethesdmn]

did she look in the mirror before she left the house?? Did she wear it for a bet?? Awful

She doesn't get that you can dress formally, appropriately, and still adhere to your 'traaaazers on a bird?!' aesthetic. A decently tailored suit etc, maybe show off your tattoos a bit, but then she wouldn't cause imaginary offence. I'm sat here at work in my jeans and t shirt with my AWFUL first tattoo and hand tattoos showing, just waiting for the general public to come in and start fainting at the sight of me.

 

[Cookiecookie]

She’s so vain she probably thinks Jackfruit is named after her.

I hope I never have to see that bowl of greasy seaweed again.

Like when she tried to start on 'Jacks' supermarket, a Tesco offshoot