Jack Monroe #119 She says lots of things, many of which are false

[Montrachet]

All these JM posts, and her old friend, Edwina, has been trending all day with one simple line. More life in this old bird it seems than Jack's centrepiece.

 

[Boyo]

Cos I’m likely to forget, will someone please remind me close to the end of December to suggest “Veganuary-ish” as the first new thread title of 2021.

 

[Harrybosch]

About the soup, people not sharing recipes are proper weirdos. When someone compliments me on a dish I've made I immediately tell them the recipe, whether they want it or not!

 

[Smeghead]

Lads. The only good thing is she’s not dreaming about her own food

 

[Boyo]

 

[Smeghead]

View attachment 350952

Oh my she’s delirious. She’s speaking in foreign tongues. She thinks she’s back in her little five bed detached house again. It’s worse than we thought. As if you Tweet all this when you’re feeling so illwith a temperature out of the stratosphere!!!

 

[Cariad]

also - is this how an immunocompromised person reacts to having covid and a dangerously high fever? Remember she claimed to be at the top of the vaccine priority list only last week

Well, Jack sorry to be the bearer of bad news but I'm an immunocompromised health care professional ( I have an autoimmune disease-real life ouchy joints ) and I've just heard I'm getting the vaccine on Tuesday ...don't think being a 'food writer/ chef' qualifies as key worker

 

[Pocahontas]

View attachment 351016View attachment 351017

Fuck sake. Turn her off!

 

[NomDeGuerre]

Her feed tonight is basically what would happen if Peter Kay rewrote Nigel Slater's Toast.

 

[jenny2603]

i feel really sad about people making this christmas dinner and having a horrible meal on a day that is supposed to bring the much needed happiness that so many people need this year! Even if some of the components are salvageable it'll all be ruined once you pour that absolutely foul gravy all over it

I'd like to think the only reason someone would attempt the 'Jack Kills Christmas' menu would be as a pass agg protest against having to cook at all but then I look at the Sqigs comments and fear that human stupidity is far deeper and more widespread than I feared. That said I too am traumatised by the very idea of that gravy to the point where I'm wondering if a good ten minute howl 'n' claw might bring some relief.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Lol I am part of the very same mailing list and just punched the air and cackled with glee x

This academic mailing list is the new step mum’s WhatsApp group, frau ships passing in the night

 

[Boyo]

“Practically ~neurotic~ about staying safe”?! Practically neurotic! Are you shitting me?

 

[Fruitjack]

What’s the fucking point of crowing that you’ve got a free range chicken when some of the meal is cheap shitty sausage, bacon, prawns and lard? How come the chicken is allowed to be free range but the pig doesn’t get that luxury? There’s also absolutely no point in announcing that your grim stuffing can be a vegan main and your ‘pudding’ could be vegan when there’s absolutely nothing else that they can eat. Red bisto is vegan and am sure would be preferred by everyone than that abomination. Why does no one except us question this pure shit?

 

[blurstoftimes]

I wish someone would actually ask Jack what her covid symptoms are - she is being uncharacteristically vague. Remember how much detail we got when she had a splinter?

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

I will tell you what is focused and precise Jack.

1. The unrelenting work our doctors and nurses do to get those who have contracted COVID better in what are quite frankly horrendous conditions.

2. The work the scientists around the world have done getting a vaccine ready to tackle this virus so our lives can get back to some semblance of normalcy.

I will tell you what is not focused and precise.

You posting what is honestly a hastily put together menu that does not constitute any items that could be considered either healthy or delicious ( in my opinion).

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

Can anyone believe THIS was THREE MONTHS AGO? It feels like a lifetime ago. And it feels like the worst thing that absolute twat has ever done. Puts cooking slop and pretending to have Covid into context, this was the life of a pet she messed with. Cunt.

 

[Alansbigplate]

 

[Pocahontas]

She’s such a bad champion of things.

Living to a tight budget? No problem! Get you down Asda and fight for those yellow-sticker bargains. If I can feed a family of two/three for £20 a week all in, then so can you. If you can’t, that means you’re shit and I’m not.

Got the ‘Rona? No problem! If I can tweet happily away for a good hour and prepare focused recipes and meal plans, then so can you, you work-shy bastards!

 

[kachoochoo]

that's 40.5 in european to save everyone looking it up

 

[colouredlines]

Ahhh, Fake Illness Jack is my favourite Jack.

Why? Because these are the moments that drive people to the cabal. She cannot lie convincingly about medical matters - it always has to be major drama, coupled with far too much tweeting. We had a flurry of newcomers after the glittery black eye. I expect the same again...we've all had a bad fever at least once, we know what it's like. Clue: not like that.

(also my favourite because I'm not @Silver Linings having to deal with all this shit, sorry )