Jack Monroe #118 Diagnosis: gifted

[jenny2603]

Why hasn't she muted the sound?!

The sound is the best bit. It's hilarious, the jolly decorations sitting in "this" and the sinister noise in the background is just perfect.

 

[BashmentLady]

Omg that custard reminds me of a particularly bad sinus infection

 

[DinosaurSenior]

I got an email this morning from my allotment society, asking if anyone could identify what species had deposited a "large mystery turd containing seed husks and berries' I swear it is the double of that loaf monstrosity. I would post the pic...but it's nearly tea time.

 

[kachoochoo]

it sounds like someone's drilling holes in the wall! I can't cope!

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

It’s also so funny how she had zero symptoms 48 hours ago and now she’s dining out on Louisa having Covid for weeks.

I would bet everything I own Jack does not have Covid and hasn’t had a test. She wouldn’t have been able to hold it in at all, she’d be tweeting jumping on Kate Garraway’s coattails about how it’s even worse than her husbands who’s been on a life support for months

 

[Nottonightbabe]

I really want to know what this. I assume the yellow stuff is custard but it has a oily looking residue on it which isn’t typical of any custard I’ve ever had

Lard?

 

[Alansbigplate]

Sorry, I think I've expressed myself badly. It was more people saying it didn't matter if you were finding it hard to work from home, as long as you were trying your best. I was working from home, significantly longer hours then I worked from, er, work and slacking off because...self-care wasn't an option. It just felt really tone deaf and privileged, like that article which says don't spend time with people who don't make you feel adored. If that makes sense!

ETA: I mean, my boss would not be interested in me explaining that I'd missed a deadline because I wasn't working from home, I was working in my home during a global pandemic so I needed to be kind to myself because I was trying my best.

I think I get you, like someone said about the conversation about mental health and self care actually minimises people suffering really intense mental health issues; a candle lit bath ain’t gonna save you!

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

oh my love I’m totally joking sorry, I think it’s an absolute bleeping Liberty the way she bends rules and yet goes on like she’s tiny Tim on her deathbed! It was just the fact she suddenly became a card carrying Catholic when it benefitted* her

* benefits being.... heightened risk of covid?

Definitely not Catholic. Catholicism is far more practically minded - 'You did something wrong, tell the Priest, say you're sorry (and mean it), do something to sort your tit out or actually prove you are sorry - great, everything's sorted, have a nice day', rather than the constant lies and mistruths and denials and 'that was THEN, not NOW'. Certainly no wittering on about random speakers becoming prophets, either.

I suspect that Catholics aren't exactly top of the Christmas Card list for anybody in that family anyhow.

 

[jenny2603]

"This" needs to be preserved for the nation so that when future generations wonder what 2020 was like they can be shown "This" in all it's surreal horror. Top marks to Jack for captioning it with the single world Enjoy!. Without question her best work to date.

 

[blurstoftimes]

I want to address how tit that entire meal looks but the thought of it is too overwhelming so instead I'm just going to focus on these depressing roast potatoes. They are not par boiled! I'll return to that photo of the horrifying prawn cocktail once I obtain some smelling salts to stop me from fainting

 

[Silver Linings]

Bear with. I’ve got them all in their tedious glory.

 

[MancBee]

Bloody hell you weren't wrong about the sound. This must be one of the most surreal things she's ever done.

ETA: "It's just referred to as "this" so we still don't know what it is." is a thread title

Also: I'm dead.

That Christmas meal is the saddest one I have ever seen. The chicken looks dry, the veg peel alternative looks dry, the veg look greasy, the gravy is a funny colour. The only thing that looks edible is the definitely shop bought frozen Yorkshires.

It took me ages to realize what was in the glass, it looked like cat sick. It was prawn cocktail. As for the pudding, revolting.

How can she make such basic food as a roast chicken and veg look so unappetising? It must be because she is gifted.

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

Wow we are really being spoiled with soggy slop and dry slop today, makes me want to howff. Also Jack really needs to check the calender, Halloween was in October.

 

[Oofadoofa]

The mystifying thing is that she thanked someone for allowing her to use her exclusive recipes... 'recipes'?? It's just cooked meat and veg, some yorkshire puddings that she couldn't possibly claim as her own no matter how much she may want to, and some god awful gravy. Mind boggling..

Edit: Forgot - some really ugly looking invention, going under the description of 'stuffing'..

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

Those vegetables look like they're in need of SSRIs. Poor, miserable little things.

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[LavaFlake]

I don't know if it's because I've had a long day but I'm crying from laughter at the frauen's commentary on this Christmas dinner from hell.

 

[Flumps]

I want to address how tit that entire meal looks but the thought of it is too overwhelming so instead I'm just going to focus on these depressing roast potatoes. They are not par boiled! I'll return to that photo of the horrifying prawn cocktail once I obtain some smelling salts to stop me from fainting

View attachment 349134

Oh blursty, have my first ever genuine 'You ok, hun?'

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

Why is the chicken yellow? Has she been smothering it in curry powder to actually give it some taste?!