Jack Monroe #102 Stop getting Bond wrong!

[Cookiecookie]

Probably made up to humiliate her parents more than anything else, I reckon.

Does being a sugar baby, and having pay pigs count as sex work?

 

[Jelly Bean]

Outshone Matt..... literally
GET
TO
FUCK

Outshone Matt? I suppose it depends what the criteria were - amusement value? Cringe factor?

 

[Silver Linings]

She’s oddly obsessed with advent calendars.

 

[Veronicaaa]

Squiggies have let me down.

No-one is asking for ouchy finger updates

I saw someone ask about it earlier this morning. Hope her finger is OK

 

[Smeghead]

I'm having issues moving on from the miracle of the finger.

 

[HotesTilaire]

Isn’t silent labour when you don’t know you’re in labour? Like the magazines where they just pop to the loo then they feel like pushing and a baby comes out and they had no idea they were pregnant?

 

[LennyBriscoe]

Oh she must have decided to stop taking a break from TV, will be nice to see her back on our screens soon. Perhaps she’s back on This Morning

Decked ! That is my second favourite (after Lenny, natch). I don’t want to know what Mat-ly’s doing with his hand but it’s cracking me up

 

[crystaleyesd]

i can't wait for her hot take on the mary wollstonecraft statue in 3 weeks time

But favourite soap is trending much higher than that Mary character who's trying to steal my thunder so feminism can wait innit

 

[Missmopps]

The FANCY fridge has been noticed

She got ripped off there, nearly a grand extra for the Smeg(ma) name in the front and in cream. I’ve got a Beko French door model which is virtually identical to that inside, even down to the fancy blue light which is supposed to slow down the rotting of veg. I paid just over a grand for it and I love it.

 

[Montrachet]

Jack's new SocMed mentor? Pleased to have been featured in his latest video, it is easy to see their respective influence upon one another's body of work.

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[PoorPatrol]

I remember wondering whether she would electrocute herself live on air. Wonder what Fireman Dad had to say about the snakes' wedding of cables and sockets? To say nothing of the trip hazard.

Snakes wedding?! what an image!

 

[Fruitjack]

I need to make some granola today, shall I take one for the team?

I have actually done this one, not once but twice as someone gave me a jar of jam and I don't really like it on its own. I naturally tweaked it a bit as I went, and you'd need about 8 of her portion sizes to be full, but it's not her worst by any means.

 

[Shesaidwhat?]

1. I feel like You Tube is stalking me as all my recommendations are now for Jack Monroe.

2. Look another job/talent/joke to add to THE LIST

3. How is the FINGER?

I watched this why is she so monotone? If you don’t want to do it don’t do it. Also if you’re thanking people just say bloody thank you. She’s actually an ok singer a few singing lessons wouldn’t go amiss but bloody hell. I’ve heard more upbeat eulogies than that waffle.

 

[kachoochoo]

the bread's not gonna last all week and that pomegranate looks quite unwell

 

[emmer_moans]

Yes it’s AI making faces out of all the faces it’s seen. It’s kind of funny, if you keep refreshing it because sometimes it has a bit of a fail around the ears, neck or the background. I once saw a “spare” pair of eyes in the corner

Oh my! I'll check out the site later. That's amazing though (but also creepy, AI scares me).
Back to Jack, I wonder if someone recommended to her to schedule hootsuite posts and recycle old bits to make her look productive whilst she actually flounders around clawing at the floor?

 

[Captainmouse]

Oh god, also who describes themselves as a 'talking head'?? The CRINGE is real!

Let me fix that for you mackie, talking arse (of the Mediterranean variety)

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Just seen that Granola recipe, it’s just baked oats, jam , oil and peanut butter - looks absolutely rank.

I’ve cooked 3 of her so called meals at the start of lockdown

some tinned spaghetti and chickpea muck
A chicken dish that called for far too much cornflour , it was literally like a blamange in texture
The vilest chilli I’ve ever tasted

I realised then it’s all just throw in a pan and cook slowly.

she’s a classic example of narcissism- a proper look at me cunt

Ah man did you rinse spaghetti hoops?? How was that for you?

 

[discokebab]

The puppet from art attack. She's does hold the same charisma as him tbf.

he was chaotic demonic bad vibes too

The Head, Disney's Robin Hood and Shredder were some early objects of infatuation for me.
Later, my best friend told me the Head looked like Katie Price's ex and I can't unsee it. I still think Robin Hood is a stone cold *pun-adjacent alert* fox.

 

[Duckypoo]

Those food pictures look like what my family euphemistically call "brown rain"

She does look rough, she should have read the Twits and heeded the warning. Bad thoughts show on your face.