Itsdaniellesjourney #14 An idiot abroad

[CoffeeFiend]

Well, well, well... Looky what we have here. A brand new shiny thread. My first, but Danielle's fourteenth. This title (thanks to @Sozhun ) was the one that received the most likes. It aptly summaries her shenanigans over the past few days. Namely walking through a very touristy part of Mexico at 3am, drunk as a skunk and clutching a bag of pork scratchings.

So far on this trip Danielle has tried Mexican food twice (and both times it was tacos) despite claiming she loves Mexican food and that's one of the big reasons why she's going. Unlike previous holidays where she plans everything within an inch of her life, this time round she was more than content to just go with the flow. What this translates to is that rather than spending a few days travelling around the country packing and unpacking her Dyson Airwrap (did you know you can't use it in Mexico? She's such a travel guru) and going out for food and drink every night, she can now go out for food and drink every night in exactly the same place. What a revelation.

Danielle might be on holiday but her liver certainly isn't. I personally cannot wait for another photo update of her alcoholic beverage. What a time to be alive.

The lesser known species, Ben, has been sighted boozily dancing in the background, but as yet there has been no interaction between the pair. More reports to follow.

 

[Toiletbrushzoflo]

She’s gone a bit cross eyed after six years of sexless marriage

 

[CoffeeFiend]

Money well spent on the laser eye surgery.

 

[JohannaCawffey]

Well, well, well... Looky what we have here. A brand new shiny thread. My first, but Danielle's fourteenth. This title (thanks to @Sozhun ) was the one that received the most likes. It aptly summaries her shenanigans over the past few days. Namely walking through a very touristy part of Mexico at 3am, drunk as a skunk and clutching a bag of pork scratchings.

So far on this trip Danielle has tried Mexican food twice (and both times it was tacos) despite claiming she loves Mexican food and that's one of the big reasons why she's going. Unlike previous holidays where she plans everything within an inch of her life, this time round she was more than content to just go with the flow. What this translates to is that rather than spending a few days travelling around the country packing and unpacking her Dyson Airwrap (did you know you can't use it in Mexico? She's such a travel guru) and going out for food and drink every night, she can now go out for food and drink every night in exactly the same place. What a revelation.

Danielle might be on holiday but her liver certainly isn't. I personally cannot wait for another photo update of her alcoholic beverage. What a time to be alive.

The lesser known species, Ben, has been sighted boozily dancing in the background, but as yet there has been no interaction between the pair. More reports to follow.

thanks for the new thread, what an apt title and holiday recap.

Holiday aside, just a little catch-up from the previous thread - she's still a money-grabbing, aff-ad-linking, tent-dress-loving, dry-ass-cooking, weather-hating, Hazza-Potter watching, fashun-disater zoning, crochet bore that's she's always been!

Before the puffy-faced, orange, galloping gourmet headed to Mexico we were treated to some classic Danism's;

there is more than one shade of white and if you paint your new-build forever home in the wrong shade of white, you will regret it forever. Hence why Dan Dan has repainted theirs, she still loves the velux windows but can't believe how much rain falls on them ( Yorkshire in the winter, it rains, when knew?)

She is a fully qualified dog groomer and nail technician, thanks to Amazon Prime where she bought her clippers and gel kit; her poor dog looks tit and so do her nails but she's saved some money so hey-ho.

She spent the money she saved on a new Valentino bag but we never saw the unboxing so I smell BS, it's as fake as her Raybans that were a tenner in Greece.

She still insists on wearing Nars in Barcelona even though it's blatantly 14 shades too orange for her it's au natural though witches.

Her niece still looks like Chesney (sorry, it's true)

She had a bitchfit on Insta stories about her sister being late, even though her sister has a new baby to get ready. But Dani was late for H&M so she was (quite rightly) FEWMIN'.

Predictions-

On her return from Mexico she is looking forward to buying a new Christmas Tree from Balsalm Hill, cos the £300 one from last year is just sooooo 2021.

She'll wear some monstrous fluffy dress for her Christmas Party and will look like a bauble that's been rolled around in a bag of sparkly feathers

Chesney will have his Christmas party, come home drunk and Dan will shame him by doing an Insta live of him talking tit and dribbling (and I'll be watching, praying that he drunk- shouts her sister's name)

That's all for now.

 

[Hereforthehottea]

Surely if it’s that hot you’d be in a bikini on the beach, cocktail in hand and not going around bars wearing a tent?!

 

[JohannaCawffey]

Little Miss Travel Expert failed on researching Tulum didn't she? It's very bohemian, chilled and laid back...I bet she stood out like a sore thumb with her sweaty orange face, Victorian nightgown and Prada doctors handbag

 

[Shielder2021]

What a boring hol not one cozy pool shot or swimming in the ocean

 

[everyoneirritatesme]

I noticed she posted the coffee pitstop story at around 5pm yesterday when they were on their way to get the bus to Tulum. That’s 12pm their time and then an hour on the bus to get there which means they arrived at the very earliest at around 1pm and then had ‘brunch’.

Sometimes she posts stories at 6/7am (their time) to provide us with very vital update photos of food and drinks - if she’s up that early I don’t understand why they set off - on their only actual day trip of the holiday so far - in the midday heat. I can’t think of anything worse than being sat on a bus at that time.

She’s the travel expert though so maybe I don’t know a thing.

 

[sicksadworld]

Saw this on Insta earlier and it reminded me of Dan

 

[Hereforthehottea]

I noticed she posted the coffee pitstop story at around 5pm yesterday when they were on their way to get the bus to Tulum. That’s 12pm their time and then an hour on the bus to get there which means they arrived at the very earliest at around 1pm and then had ‘brunch’.

Sometimes she posts stories at 6/7am (their time) to provide us with very vital update photos of food and drinks - if she’s up that early I don’t understand why they set off - on their only actual day trip of the holiday so far - in the midday heat. I can’t think of anything worse than being sat on a bus at that time.

She’s the travel expert though so maybe I don’t know a thing.

Maybe they have a five hour shag a thon?!

 

[CoffeeFiend]

It's good to see Danielle heading out a bit more, but I think it would be nice if she shared exactly what was so interesting about the Mayan history... Maybe share some knowledge? Give us something more interesting than a 6 years old's account of their summer vacation with their parents.

Glad to see she's trying more tacos I can imagine it's been a few days since her last and she's forgotten what they taste like.

 

[littleladyk]

She’s flow to Mexico because they like Mexican food? One, I’ve never seen her cook Mexican food - either that or the slop she makes is Mexican and I just can’t tell and two, she’s had tacos. Not overly Mexican is it Dani love?

I agree with that she’s definitely done this one on the cheap. The Greece one cost enough to feed a small family for a year!

 

[JohannaCawffey]

It's good to see Danielle heading out a bit more, but I think it would be nice if she shared exactly what was so interesting about the Mayan history... Maybe share some knowledge? Give us something more interesting than a 6 years old's account of their summer vacation with their parents.

Glad to see she's trying more tacos I can imagine it's been a few days since her last and she's forgotten what they taste like.

I don't believe she gives two hoots about the historical and cultural significance of Chichen Itza.

She could have gone to one of the closer ancient sites, some of those are more immersive than Chichen Itza, in that you can climb them and really get up close. She's googled 'things I must do in Mexico' and Chichen Itza came up top. Then she's booked a trip that included a ceynote to kill two birds with one stone.

 

[mcfeez]

I don't believe she gives two hoots about the historical and cultural significance of Chichen Itza.

She could have gone to one of the closer ancient sites, some of those are more immersive than Chichen Itza, in that you can climb them and really get up close. She's googled 'things I must do in Mexico' and Chichen Itza came up top. Then she's booked a trip that included a ceynote to kill two birds with one stone.

I don't really see the problem with doing the most well known Maya city. Most people who go to Rome see the Colloseum and the Vatican even though there are literally tons of ruins and churches of all over

 

[JohannaCawffey]

I don't really see the problem with doing the most well known Maya city. Most people who go to Rome see the Colloseum and the Vatican even though there are literally tons of ruins and churches of all over

Didn't say there's a problem with it - but as you say, it's the most well-known of all the places to visit. It's so basic. She isn't visiting the country for the history, or to see the sights - she said herself they chose Mexico for the food..it just feels like she's going through a list of things to do in Mexico, with no individual ideas;

Fifth Avenue
Tulum
Coco Bongo
Chichen Itza

Bet she goes to XCaret next.

 

[Hereforthehottea]

I can’t stop laughing thinking about her sat at the pool wearing a tent, her massive headphones, crocheting and drinking a hot coffee, bright orange red with sweat dripping off her

 

[elloelloello]

I can’t stop laughing thinking about her sat at the pool wearing a tent, her massive headphones, crocheting and drinking a hot coffee, bright orange red with sweat dripping off her

I know what is she thinking! Like a little hot orange sweaty granny by the pool

 

[#ad#aff]

I forgot she was still on holiday. GOD SHE IS SO BORING.

 

[Sticky One]

How many drink boomerangs are we at so far?

 

[Snoopsmcgoops]

Has she even been to the beach?