100% - we are not free of guilt in involving the kids, even by accident or frustration. I feel for them so much and - as an example - I was making tea for them all the other night and agonising over whether I was being mean for what I was serving them... then remembered I give my kids the same thing every week! But the whole situation has me analysing everything we do just in case. It’s so bloody hard and really it’s always the kids that lose. It breaks my heart. And it’s why I feel for the kids with cheater and cheater. It all just feels so toxic.Oh totally! yes I know you can't say one narrative fits all situations, and my mums experience was extreme,what I posted was the tip of a truly horrific iceberg.Ultimately it is always the child that is affected regardless of what side they end up living on isn't it? xx