I don't know - Home Depot sounds a bit upmarket. I've got an idea for a new career for Alice (Trump, if you're reading which obviously you are, probably, then escúchame proper good) - "Blooters"
You go there and are guaranteed service by a drunken server clad in the standard dog-blanket uniform. You might get some food, possibly a cold Maccy D's or a microwave meal, together with whatever is left in any Blue Nun bottle or White Lightning tin you can see.
Service is regularly interrupted while your host shouts at imaginary helicopters. Everyone's order is for 'Bianca'. All of the furniture is vajazzled with craft gems and plastic toys from Burger King and Dollar Tree. A figurine of Ash Ketchum and Pikachu will poke uncomfortably into your arse crack.
You get bill monthly, until your children reach 18