Ioan Gruffudd & Alice Evans #128 From the cover of Hello to a PRO!

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Looks like Malice got the Turd message on stocking up on snacks and wine. She’s not going to go to court - she’s coming to join the party and spend the day Tattling!
 
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Yeah I felt quite anxious looking at her. I’m five eight and between two kids under five, lockdown baby and stress eating through my husband’s nervous breakdown I am 12 stone to 12 and half stone and feel awful about myself. I hope I don’t look in a way that people think i look like a badly dressed wahle. I do feel oddly sorry for her today. I also think her approach to court explains theit wedding photos. I bet she talked an huge and enormous game, pissed people off and then left it beyond the last minute to pull it together.
Don’t feel awful about yourself. Ever.
The best advice I ever received was to treat yourself as you would your best friend. Would you make your friend feel awful? Insecure? Upset and anxious? Of course you wouldn’t. So show yourself the same love and compassion as you show those around you. And remember that ‘all shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well’.
 
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You know I’ve been known to buy a box of wine in my time. And that’s a bloody big box or that’s a small trolley. Is this the whole everything’s bigger in America thing?
It's not an actual wine box, it's a cardboard box wine bottles come in. From the interior shot, I think someone in Trader Joe's heard her loudness and recognized her, it may not even be a pap just a 'citizen journalist' or someone who works at/knows that outlet, but it definitely isn't something Alice arranged because even she isn't that stupid to come out with a huge cardboard box with wine when Ioan's TRO specifically mentions his concerns about alcohol
 
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Height: 5'10"/178cm
Weight: 210-220lbs/95-100kg
BMI: ~31-32

PS. If you're wondering, I've measured around a couple thousand patients in my time.
I actually hate BMI as a measurement of health. It was devised by a Belgian polymath who was trying to identify the average white European male. Not for women, not for other ethnicities, not for Black women or people of colour, yet it’s used as a common metric for health insurance in the US.
Seriously, though, if Alice went to rehab and knocked off the booze, she’d lose several stone at least.
 
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I’m not a body shamer either but she has cankles for crying out loud. That’s when you know things have got bad.
I'd say she more than a UK 16/18. I'm just under 5"10 and a UK Size 14 in most things, sometimes a 12, depending on the brand. This is me in a 14 dress, which didn't give me much breathing room! I'd say she's probably an 18/20, based on these recent photos, but it could be because what she is wearing is so unflattering!
 
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Is there a song called Chickens Coming Home to Roost?

Ioan has been playing Things Can Only Get Better on a loop for the last 18 months. He is moving on to The Long and Winding Road now.
I’ve got the intro of ‘Eye of The Tiger’ stuck in my head!! 🤣🤣 RAWR!!!!
 
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It’s 2.45pm here down under on August 2nd soooo:

Happy bleeping birthday Ms Evans!

Now that you are 54
Act your age, you’ve become a bore
Get to rehab so you can live for more
You’re definitely NOT someone we adore
So pick your drunk ass off the floor
Zip your mouth and close your jaw
Obey your PRO we implore
Coz no, we don’t want bleeping more!
Here’s a cake, you earned it - RAWR!

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I love this! 🤣👏😁

Inspired hat-tip to @sevenyearbiatch


In court was a woman named Evans
To the evidence, she said “Oh heavens!”
That couldn’t be me
I’m abused, you see
So surprised! and at sixes and sevens!

The judge calmly asked her for proof
She blustered and hit the court roof
“THERE’S NO NEED!” she erupted
“YOU’VE ALL BEEN CORRUPTED!”
And turned on her red-ribboned hoof

Now she quietly seethes in a cell
They’ve taken her laptop as well
Her socks have been busted
She couldn’t be trusted
Oh poor Alice, in DIVORCE HELL

Happy PRO day, Turds! 🥰
This is brilliant! 🤣😆👏

Thanks Sisturds for your fab poems on PRO day! 😍🤣🥰

:poop::poop::poop::poop::poop:😘
 
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Well I'm in Qld Australia... The waiting for the start of karma is driving me bonkers , won't be til late Wednesday shinola starts hitting the fan for our Big Al here 🤞🤞🤞
 
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You know I’ve been known to buy a box of wine in my time. And that’s a bloody big box or that’s a small trolley. Is this the whole everything’s bigger in America thing?
I was working wondering same, big box or small trolley?
 
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Why the scarf & sweater? Isn't it hot in LA?
Yes and the friend is in a t-shirt and shorts, big Al must be melting.

The only thing that makes me think the person with Alice even knows her is Alice seems to have plonked one of her scarfs on her. Apart from that she looks like she came to do the windows and was roped into going shopping with her, so either she’s some kind of paid help or she’s connected in that way. 🤷🏻‍♀️ 🤷🏻‍♀️
Maybe she was brought to lift the case of wine into and out of the Prius?
 
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Greetings all,

Happy birth PRO day to Alice! Based on those photos, looks like she’s planning to rosé all day 🍷🍷🍷 I wonder if she filled out a job application when she was at Trader Joe’s? 😄

PS: As a cishet female, what makes a person attractive to me is self-confidence in accepting who you are, along with kindness and thoughtfulness. Alice has none of those qualities.
 
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When she’s not doing the manical rictus grin.

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I believe Malice dressed like a little girl to make others believe her lie about her birthdate. She didn’t want to be seen as five years older than Yo because she already knew that the timing of their relationship was suspect so didn’t also want to be seen as robbing the cradle. That and the world’s tackiest fashion sense. 🤭
 
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Please no one worry about their weight, I am 86kg and 5’5 and should be like 68kg 😭. Mr P likes some jiggle in the trunk though so it’s ok 🤣

I don’t think Alice is even obese, she looks like a menopausal woman she does look bloated and pale though and it gives her a really sickly look

Im sure none of us wear diner table cloths or white winkle pickers and don’t dye their hair luminous yellow (unless you are into that kind of thing 🤣)
BIB these are almost my exact stats! Twinning!
 
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I have to say, speaking as an alky, I'm stunned that she so brazenly shows so much booze in her trolley! Christ, subtlety woman? Try to mix up the shops a little, one bottle at a time?

Needs a GFM, picks up a duck tonne of rose. Have you no shame woman?!?! Oh ... it's Alice, course not.

On a personal note (can't believe I'm doing this on PRO day), tonight will be the first night in a long time when I'm not having a drink. There's none left in the fridge, Mr JuneBug is under strict orders not to buy me any. I'm going for it! Wish me luck darlings. Even if it's just one night, it's a start.
You're so brave talking about this, good luck sweetheart, 🥰 you got this 💪 baby steps! 👣 👏 😘
Much love, ❤ xxx
 
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Well it's 8:30pm here. I am not caught up on the threads but I'm dead tired and need to go to bed. I have a busy day tomorrow so it will be all over, red rover by the time I get back on here tomorrow evening (that's about 24 hours away). Happy tattling! I'll have some reading to do tomorrow after work!
 
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Edited to add that I have two size 16 dresses in my wardrobe too!I think it depends on where you shop and your body size, cos I range from 12 to 16, so go figure 🤷🏼‍♀️
I'd say she more than a UK 16/18. I'm just under 5"10 and a UK Size 14 in most things, sometimes a 12, depending on the brand. This is me in a 14 dress, which didn't give me much breathing room! I'd say she's probably an 18/20, based on these recent photos, but it could be because what she is wearing is so unflattering!
 
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Three hours at least till we know if she has shown for the DVRO AGAINST her.
I am here for consequences.
I am here for all the people stuck in an abusive marriages and who stay longer because of the children.
I am here for the children being abused by their own mother.
I am here for Bianca who escaped an abusive marriage herself and stands by Ioan.
I am here for Ioan.

I wanted to write something silly and funny, that will come later, I really hope she sees consequences today. duck Alice.
 
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