Ioan Gruffudd & Alice Evans #111 Hey Alice, get a job and go fund yourself!

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I took a week off from reading about Alice’s shenanigans because my head began to ache. I was thinking how much calmer IG must feel since he’s been gone from Alice.

He’s gone from A to B
‘from one’s starting point to one’s destination’

I think that has a nice ring to it.

 
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18) The infamous ‘Marjorie’ video exists online and nobody in their right mind would hire her
 
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@ReturningthePearls I love what you have written about the need to be able to identify and express negative thoughts, feelings and emotions.

I have just bought a book of poems called "how the heart can falter", the description of the book reads it is "the story of the experiences that build us, of the people whose actions are the tools that carve us, of the unflinching hope of a child’s love, of the constant friction of a life lived in grief."

I bought it not only because the poems are beautiful (and if you Google the poet you will find her website where she reads some of own works) but because I was also prompted by reading her online work into thinking of how under-estimated the power of words, the ability to express all those negative thoughts and feelings, are in the road to personal recovery after experiencing bereavement, loss (of any kind) and grief.

It reminded me also of the book of Psalms, and the "difficult" to read Psalms - the imprecatory ones where David or the author is expressing anger and bewilderment towards their deity because of what is happening in their life. These were included in the book as well as the praise psalms because it was recognised that at times of grief and despair someone may struggle to put into words what they wanted to express, and it was/is important to express them rather than bottle them up and become ill from what we now know can happen through unexpressed grief, stress, anger.

Using the written words of others is a "safe" and creative way of identifying and expressing our own thoughts, feelings and emotions.

And you, dear RTP, often express for us in beautiful and creative ways - not only with your thoughts and words but also with your art - and we appreciate it.

(Apologies for the waffling )
 
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Am I right in thinking Alice has actually set up a GoFundMe account to pay for legal representation in her divorce?!

I’ve not really been keeping up with developments past the RO he was granted and the dossier of evidence he presented with more to follow in court which I presume has been pushed back until later in the year.

I saw there was some ruckus about the eldest being taken out of a private school because of the fees. Has this happened? Her maid/nanny no longer works for her and they’ve sold the marital home and downsized. Presumably this has reduced overheads quite considerably, and she must have some savings from the sale of the property.

Why is she claiming poverty? Why is she unable to get a job if both children are in school full-time? Am I missing something here? Apologies if this has all been explained but these threads do move at a pace!
 
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She says it's for the divorce but then references the August 2, hearing which is meant to decide if the temporary restraining order still in effect becomes permanent. We don't know if the child was actually re-enrolled for the coming school year. Ioan said he couldn't afford it and Alice claimed not to have money, but it hasn't been addressed. The house has not yet been sold and the divorce itself is proceeding quite slowly as she has not filed the requisite paperwork now it is going into litigation vs. the collaborative process that had been in place (but from which she withdrew). She claimed in February that Ioan had "fired" the nanny/housekeeper but she appears to still be working for Alice. No idea how or who is paying for it. She was also busted over the weekend for spending on many purchases on Ebay during the time she claimed to be broke.

She's claiming poverty because she believes Ioan should pay for everything forever with no downward adjustments. It's unrealistic. She also claims she can't work (see various excuses given upthread). She claimed over the weekend she owes $30k in unpaid bills, which seems ... untrue? A house like that and their lifestyle doesn't seem like it equals $30k in outgoings in a short period of time. Basically, she thinks no fault divorce is a scam and thinks she should be looked after for the rest of her life.
 
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Very quick summary

She lies - a lot!

She's still squatting in the family home

She lied about the maid, tripped herself up and had to admit Gloria is still working for her

Claims to be destitute, unable to feed the children etc, but is buying on eBay and eldest child has claimed to have very expensive concert tickets (unknown who bought them, we're guessing mAlice)

No sign eldest child has left very expensive school

mAlice is now claiming she has been saddled with 30k of debt this last few weeks because her ex has dared to close down the joint account she apparently still had access to.

You couldn't make it up, but she desperately tries.
 
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I don’t think IG will go for sole custody.
I don't either. This is where I have some side eye with Ioan, that he has left his kids with an unstable alcoholic - he has already been called because she is 'dying on the couch' and she 'collapsed in the shower' and the girls had to help her. How much more have those poor girls been exposed to that Ioan is already aware of? IMO it was enough for an emergency application or an psych assessment. I know there will be a chorus of 'he is going the legal route' but I think he could have raised issues with her previous behaviour and drinking. I don't think he wants full custody.
 
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I will be very unsettled if he doesn’t, a blind man can see how damaging that environment is for those girls.
I don’t think he has a choice. What judge presiding over the divorce is going to award her any type of custody? She refuses to play ball, she is irresponsible and reckless in every way from generating income to looking for a new place to live and even appointing and maintaining representation. The raging substance abuse problem coupled with addiction to social media and shopping PLUS A PRO? Don’t forget the multiple violations and the continued and prolonged PA. Yeah sure. Fantastic candidate for shared custody lol
 
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Am I right in thinking Alice has actually set up a GoFundMe account to pay for legal representation in her divorce?! YES

I’ve not really been keeping up with developments past the RO he was granted and the dossier of evidence he presented with more to follow in court which I presume has been pushed back until later in the year. YES - TO AUGUST

I saw there was some ruckus about the eldest being taken out of a private school because of the fees. Has this happened? WE THINK SO Her maid/nanny no longer works for her and they’ve sold the marital home and downsized. NO AND NO Presumably this has reduced overheads quite considerably, and she must have some savings from the sale of the property. NO

Why is she claiming poverty? SHE IS A LAZY ENTITLED MADAM Why is she unable to get a job if both children are in school full-time? EXACTLY Am I missing something here? NO Apologies if this has all been explained but these threads do move at a pace!
 
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He might have little choice at this point with how inept Alice is being at taking responsibility. I don't think he wants full custody, no. He'll also be taking into account the impact of it on his relationship with B and, more importantly, her MS. It is not going to be a peaceful custody arrangement if it happens. I feel so much for little E as I'm sure she would love to be reunited with her dad but would feel so conflicted about her mum too. Big E would find it the worst thing in the world at this point in time. Bianca will be at the sharp end of their emotional turmoil. Alice could have done so much better with this for the girls. She's infuriating.
 
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Interested to hear everybody’s thoughts on what would be the best outcome at the end of this?
And the worst?
I posted my best, healthiest possible outcome a page or two ago and my worst is Alice is jailed or becomes totally unhinged and tries to do something that the PRO is trying to prevent.
 
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Bianca is involved with a man with a famously volatile ex and 2 alienated kids - she should take this into account and if not, she should bow out. She got into the relationship with her eyes wide open and he was aware of her illness. If Ioan does let his kids go in favour of Bianca so as to not affect her MS, I know what I would feel about Ioan.
 
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This struck a chord with me, I was the same I wouldn’t sit in my living room because my neighbours were so loud all the time, I’d panic.
I closed myself up in a room upstairs at the back of the house.
I’m a bit better now but honestly it was a real phobia.
I hope you can start to heal a bit, you deserve to be happy and calm, I wish that for you
 
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Interested to hear everybody’s thoughts on what would be the best outcome at the end of this?
And the worst?
The best outcome is that Ioan is financially solvent, the kids have a safe, loving place to live & therapy for what they've been through, and everyone can move forward with their lives. I don't care what happens to Alice, she can get in the bin.

Worst outcome? That the children grow up to be dysfunctional adults who perpetuate the dysfunction on their own children.
 
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its a difficult one because one is estranged (and likely cant have sole custody for a number of reasons( and one inept. I would not like to be the judge of this case.
 
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Bear in mind he now has two seriously alienated kids. He may want full custody and he may ask for it. But the reality is he has one child who has already hacked into his social media and threatened to call CPS on him. The other apparently refuses to take his calls. What he wants and what is best for all concerned may be two different things. I doubt he is weighing them solely against his relationship with Bianca, though that would factor in.
 
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