I think for me what I struggled/struggle with A LOT (this isn’t aimed and anyone in particular, it really isn’t), from the onset …. they’re adults nothing to see here. I could say the same as other adults on the thread, I was 17 when I left home (I didn’t want to but had a difficult relationship with my father) so I had to. It was actually quite scary, I was completely on my own in life (not in a relationship) I didn’t leave home to get married, or live with a partner and I would say I was very streetwise but I was still VERY young. When I look at my daughters I think how could HUW, a man of that age, a relatively intelligent one, who’s lived a life and knows the difference between right and wrong. And seen in the world (and reported on it!) what’s good and bad. Yet has still chosen to privately message youngsters and basically mess with them and to me it’s just not right and never will be.
As far as the dress message and this is in no way an attack on anyone, it’s just my viewpoint. I don’t want to try and minimise that young staff member’s experience because I can see it could be quite uncomfortable/intimidating and if the BBC have seen it and stated they felt it was flirting, then to me it was.
There was a lovely Tattler (so sorry I can’t remember your name) that posted about their daughter who was dating a much older man. I think the mother still sees her daughter but the daughter can’t/doesn’t go to their home. I may have this completely wrong (and I apologise if I have) but I assumed it was because of the older man she was dating wasn’t welcome. If it were me and you can find a way to do this, I would welcome them into your home with open arms, so she never feels she has to chose, that way if he’s not right for her there’s more chance she will walk away. I say this because a similar thing happened to a school friend and she ended up having children and then was pretty much stuck with him for many, many, years even though she hated him a few years into their relationship.
We knew my SIL was in a relationship with someone who was feeding her drug habit, none of us liked him, so she was never allowed to bring him to family gatherings, which must have been difficult for her when we were all in couples. So one year to everyone’s horror
![Face screaming in fear :scream: 😱](https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/gh/joypixels/emoji-assets@5.0/png/64/1f631.png)
(and it was our turn to do Christmas) I invited him too. A few months after that she left him for good and came to live with us for a bit. So for me it was well worth having a slightly uncomfortable Christmas. As the saying goes…. keep your friends close and your enemies even closer, obviously don’t let the person know you’re not keen on them
![Winking face :wink: 😉](https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/gh/joypixels/emoji-assets@5.0/png/64/1f609.png)
. In fact I would do the opposite and welcome them with open arms. That way you get to see how they treat your loved one, although I do appreciate they could be different behind closed doors.