SCENE: THE COUNSELLOR'S OFFICE
HELEN ENTERS, WEARING A GIANT FUR COAT AND A PAIR OF DIRTY CONVERSE. SHE IS WEARING A LOT OF MAKE-UP - HEAVY BLUE EYESHADOW, BRIGHT RED LIPSTICK AND HEAVY ORANGE BLUSHER. THE COUNSELLOR IS SAT IN A CHAIR, OPPOSITE AN EMPTY CHAIR.
Counsellor: Good morning, Helen
Helen: ORWOOOOOIGHT?
Counsellor: Yes, I'm great thank you, come and sit down
Helen: Ooh, I will, give me a second, I've been at boot camp and it was bum and leg day! Kat 'ad me doin' lunges! Me morning coffee was kickin' in and I made a right stench if ya know wot I mean!
Counsellor: That's not a problem, you can stand if you wa-
Helen: It made me laff though, Fil said last night that I've got a rotten bottom! He's so funny! He was playing on COD and I was 'avin a lovely Lush baff, bit of self-care ya know, and I did a little fart in the baff, and Fil 'eard it through 'is headset!
Counsellor: How funny. So how has your week bee-
Helen: Sorry, do ya mind if I 'ave a quick snack? I nipped into Waitrose on the way 'ere, I 'ad to get some kievs. I'm just gonna 'ave some crisps. Wanna get involved?
Counsellor: No thank you, I've just eaten. So how has your week been?
Helen: Orwoight really. I mean I've been 'avin the same problem though
Counsellor: Ok, do you think it's got worse, better or about the same?
HELEN SITS DOWN AND TAKES A TURKEY, STUFFING AND BACON SANDWICH OUT OF HER BAG, TAKES IT OUT OF ITS PACKET AND PUTS THE SANDWICH ON HER LAP. SHE OPENS A LARGE BAG OF SALT AND VINEGAR BALSAMIC KETTLE CHIPS, OPENS THE SANDWICH AND STARTS LAYERING CRISPS ON THE OPEN SANDWICH, BEFORE REASSEMBLING IT. SHE THEN SUCKS THE CRISP RESIDUE OFF EACH OF HER FINGERS BEFORE TUCKING INTO THE SANDWICH. THE COUNSELLOR GLANCES AT HER WATCH.
Helen: I fink it's worse actually. Like Fil says I'm ovafinkin it, but it's affectin' everyfin I do. I fink everyone is finkin it about me, I can tell everyone is judgin' me.
Counsellor: Do you think I'm judging you for it?
Helen: Well, yeah. I mean, everyone does. But I understand. It's hard for people to just see me for me wivout judgin' me.
Counsellor: I want you to know that I'm not judging you, Helen. Not at all.
Helen: Fanks, but like I said, I get it. It's all people see when they look at me. It's like they can't see the person, they just see "it"
HELEN MAKES A
SIGN
Counsellor: So, you feel like you're just a label?
Helen: Yeah. It feels like I'm not a person wiv feelings. I'm not a successful influencer who works so 'ard ev'ry day. I'm not a loving dog owna. I'm not an amazin' best friend and girlfriend. I'm just one fing that people can't see past. I'm just...
HELEN SIGHS
Helen: I'm just alternative
FIN
now its not my job but im ngl, I'm nearly her age, wear make up alot but im also TERRIBLE at make up but it's cos i can't be bothered practicing. 
