Unpopular opinion alert - I know we don't deserve doggos etc etc but I can't stand dogs. I find them filthy (I'm always nice to my friends' dogs because I'm not an hole but truly, I can't stand dogs, I just tolerate them).
The thought of one licking my mouth makes me almost as nauseous as Helen eating her ear pickings.
Still feel more sorry for the dog in this situation, though.
Edit: To elaborate further - they smell awful, ruin nice walks by barking non-stop and running up to me and put their paws on me, only for their dumb owner to be all "it's okay, he's friendly", I get so sick of seeing their tit on the pavement and I used to live next to one that barked all day and night. Yes, it's the owner's fault that these things happen, but the dogs still do them, and I can't stand them as a result. Like mosquitos, my world would be a better place without them.