Gender Discussion #28

[kittenattack]

Now imagine that monstrosity lying opposite you in a hospital bed whilst you're being examined, cleaned up, in pain, using the commode, exposed and vulnerable etc. I thought post natal was bad enough with all the vacant eyed, bored partners sitting around trying to catch an eyeful of breast feeding, but at least you're not ill and can close the curtains and move around.

 

[Notworthy]

From what I've observed, parents now do massively mollycoddle their children. I noticed this years ago when I was dropping/collecting my now 18 year old when he was in Year 5. We weren't even allowed to drop them at the school gates. It was all very restrictive and I hated it because it all felt so babyish. I also noticed Year 6 parents and grandparents collecting their children directly from school how they were going to manage at secondary was beyond me.

My eldest was going to and from school by himself at age 7 and was travelling abroad by himself at 17.



Another monstrosity

I expect he's doing it to gain access to the ladies changing rooms

So true, my Son went to Secondary School at 10, He's 27 now) He got the train and bus, if I picked him up I waited in the car park having a chat with other parents, move forward just 4 years and all the parents were standing right outside the door like it was infants or something. Working at my local station I would see a boy going to the same school as my son did but his Mum went on the train with him and sat with him. My Son would've gone apeshit If I'd even been in the same carriage When my Son ended up at the wrong station he managed to figure it out for himself and get home.

 

[nothanksbabes]

So true, my Son went to Secondary School at 10, He's 27 now) He got the train and bus, if I picked him up I waited in the car park having a chat with other parents, move forward just 4 years and all the parents were standing right outside the door like it was infants or something. Working at my local station I would see a boy going to the same school as my son did but his Mum went on the train with him and sat with him. My Son would've gone apeshit If I'd even been in the same carriage When my Son ended up at the wrong station he managed to figure it out for himself and get home.

This is quite shocking. I was walking to primary school (lived in a village, probably half a mile walk?) at 7 or so, and everyone got the bus to secondary school about three or four miles away.

And the school was open all day so you could come and go as you pleased. We'd walk into town for lunch. And to scuttle off to smoke tit weed at a pal's house . As far as I recall nobody was kidnapped or murdered.

This was late 90s/early 2000s.

 

[Notworthy]

This is quite shocking. I was walking to primary school (lived in a village, probably half a mile walk?) at 7 or so, and everyone got the bus to secondary school about three or four miles away.

And the school was open all day so you could come and go as you pleased. We'd walk into town for lunch. And to scuttle off to smoke tit weed at a pal's house . As far as I recall nobody was kidnapped or murdered.

This was late 90s/early 2000s.

At my infant school the playground was just a patch of tarmac in the middle of a common, no fences but absolutely none of us stepped off that tarmac ever

 

[Vanelope]

For those of you with adult children - was there so much knowledge about predatory adults and children with knives? I lived close to school so walking wasn’t an issue but was out working nights in a bar as a glass collector when I was 17. I wouldn’t let my kid do what I did - (as I was exposed to creepy predatory adults and hadn’t a clue).

*Im not judging what anyone has done, but getting a balance between safety and independence is hard and I am struggling with it.

 

[Ekathrina]

I honestly find it really hard to look at that photo of a fat middle-aged man surrounded by a load of young women because I just can’t fathom how he’s not thoroughly ashamed and embarrassed. A pathetic, useless specimen.

 

[klarakluckbag]

Now imagine that monstrosity lying opposite you in a hospital bed whilst you're being examined, cleaned up, in pain, using the commode, exposed and vulnerable etc. I thought post natal was bad enough with all the vacant eyed, bored partners sitting around trying to catch an eyeful of breast feeding, but at least you're not ill and can close the curtains and move around.

It's interesting that you mention postnatal wards. We tend to think of "vulnerable" women in hospital as those who are elderly and/or sick.

My hospital introduced overnight stay permits for partners on our postnatal ward several years ago. We provide reclining chairs for the partner, and they are absolutely not permitted to use the patients' toilet or bathroom facilities, they can use the public toilets, and they need to go home to wash and change etc, this applies to partners of either sex (some women have their mum or sister with them, and of course, we have female partners staying too)

The new mums like having their partners there, but inevitably, we have had problems with men using the toilets and showers, men being aggressive when challenged on their behaviour, and with men generally being loud and annoying on the ward. There have been instances of men trying to take their baby away from the mother because their mother (baby's grandmother) can "look after it at home". We have had two men arguing over paternity, we've had men walking around in their underpants, or topless.

When it was first introduced, I protested strongly to anyone who would listen*. I have always thought, and still do, that women on a postnatal ward should not have to continuously have to share their space with men who are strangers to them. These are women who are, or have been unwell during or after their delivery, or who have had surgery, possibly of an extremely intimate nature. It's fine for men to come in during visiting hours, but I don't think it's appropriate to have them there all day and night.

*Not that anyone did. They had to listen to Covid though

 

[Morphine]

It's interesting that you mention postnatal wards. We tend to think of "vulnerable" women in hospital as those who are elderly and/or sick.

My hospital introduced overnight stay permits for partners on our postnatal ward several years ago. We provide reclining chairs for the partner, and they are absolutely not permitted to use the patients' toilet or bathroom facilities, they can use the public toilets, and they need to go home to wash and change etc, this applies to partners of either sex (some women have their mum or sister with them, and of course, we have female partners staying too)

The new mums like having their partners there, but inevitably, we have had problems with men using the toilets and showers, men being aggressive when challenged on their behaviour, and with men generally being loud and annoying on the ward. There have been instances of men trying to take their baby away from the mother because their mother (baby's grandmother) can "look after it at home". We have had two men arguing over paternity, we've had men walking around in their underpants, or topless.

When it was first introduced, I protested strongly to anyone who would listen*. I have always thought, and still do, that women on a postnatal ward should not have to continuously have to share their space with men who are strangers to them. These are women who are, or have been unwell during or after their delivery, or who have had surgery, possibly of an extremely intimate nature. It's fine for men to come in during visiting hours, but I don't think it's appropriate to have them there all day and night.

*Not that anyone did. They had to listen to Covid though

I don’t think I’d have been arsed about being in post natal with just the other mothers so long as my partner had been there for the birth but oh my god if there are other men allowed to stay then I’d 100% want mine by my side. I was abused by a previous partner and I get skittish around some men and I couldn’t cope with strange men I don’t know around feeling vulnerable without him. Which I guess is a big part of the issues you’ve had, they’re allowed to be together so we should too.

also I’m kinda shocked at having to literally pick the kids up from school, when I was at school as far as I remember the parents didn’t come inside the school gates? Everyone who was picked up was collected from outside. I started walking to school with my friend and her mum when I was about 8 and by the time we were in year six we all walked together without our parents. I caught the school bus to secondary school in another town when I was 11. This would have been around 2002.

i think - whoever said it, was right about trans being a serious case of late capitalism and should be more of a warning than anything. I remember hearing other people on a different forum I use reffering to it as a new religion, some people just need a faith and community to be in and people don’t rely on faith as much anymore so they’ve found something new - I wonder if the trans movement will be the Catholic Church scandal of the modern day.

i find it interesting that there keep being sub cultures popping up where people are heavily rejecting modern day convienences and looking for more humble ways of life, getting into gardening, keeping chickens, thrifting, less screens more family time and board games etc (there’s a girl I watch who does YouTube shorts called crunchy mom which is all a parody of these things). Seeing the way things like the trans movement have operated online and groomed people and the negative effects that social media and the abundance of technology has had on peoples lives I do wonder if it some point there will be a backlash and people will start to reject it

 

[Scotch Mist]

I don’t think I’d have been arsed about being in post natal with just the other mothers so long as my partner had been there for the birth but oh my god if there are other men allowed to stay then I’d 100% want mine by my side. I was abused by a previous partner and I get skittish around some men and I couldn’t cope with strange men I don’t know around feeling vulnerable without him. Which I guess is a big part of the issues you’ve had, they’re allowed to be together so we should too.

also I’m kinda shocked at having to literally pick the kids up from school, when I was at school as far as I remember the parents didn’t come inside the school gates? Everyone who was picked up was collected from outside. I started walking to school with my friend and her mum when I was about 8 and by the time we were in year six we all walked together without our parents. I caught the school bus to secondary school in another town when I was 11. This would have been around 2002.

i think - whoever said it, was right about trans being a serious case of late capitalism and should be more of a warning than anything. I remember hearing other people on a different forum I use reffering to it as a new religion, some people just need a faith and community to be in and people don’t rely on faith as much anymore so they’ve found something new - I wonder if the trans movement will be the Catholic Church scandal of the modern day.

i find it interesting that there keep being sub cultures popping up where people are heavily rejecting modern day convienences and looking for more humble ways of life, getting into gardening, keeping chickens, thrifting, less screens more family time and board games etc (there’s a girl I watch who does YouTube shorts called crunchy mom which is all a parody of these things). Seeing the way things like the trans movement have operated online and groomed people and the negative effects that social media and the abundance of technology has had on peoples lives I do wonder if it some point there will be a backlash and people will start to reject it

Yes I think you're right. The days are gone when predatory men entered the Catholic Church to get them access to vulnerable women and children.

Now they can follow the trans cult instead.

 

[Notworthy]

For those of you with adult children - was there so much knowledge about predatory adults and children with knives? I lived close to school so walking wasn’t an issue but was out working nights in a bar as a glass collector when I was 17. I wouldn’t let my kid do what I did - (as I was exposed to creepy predatory adults and hadn’t a clue).

*Im not judging what anyone has done, but getting a balance between safety and independence is hard and I am struggling with it.

Yes, my Son had to go through Croydon to get to school. He didn't have a smart phone as he didn't need one and I felt it would be more likely to make him a target, proven by how many of his friends got mugged. Predatory adults have always been around, we've all known that, in fact when I was in Secondary School we had the Police in for assembly to provide guidance as there had been some sex attacks in the park near our school and a pervert exposing himself on the train. We actually weren't supposed to walk through the park on our own but one boy did as he had been to the dentist and was late, rather then take the long way he cut through and was raped. That definitely made us aware. I think the biggest difference between now and then is that although it's much more in the news now, we were far better prepared in the past, probably because we were allowed so much more freedom plus although we had more freedom we usually had atleast 1 parent at home. It's also important to realise that 97% of attacks on children happen within the home and/or by someone known to them.

 

[Cassandra333]

When I was a kid, we stayed out all day and I spent a lot of time in the local 'woods'. They weren't really woods, they were part of a local farm and a herd of cows grazed there. We weren't allowed to go in there but I loved playing along a stream there so they couldn't keep me out. You had to run if the farmer saw you but that rarely happened. My mum stopped walking me to school at about six and I went on my own for the rest of school.

But when my kids were little, my mother became neurotic over their safety. She constantly berated me, saying it wasn't like when I was a child, and it wasn't safe for kids to go out playing. I used to roll my eyes but I did keep a close eye on my kids and they definitely never had the freedom that I'd had.

It dawned on me years later that for all my mum went on about how safe it had been when I was a kid, I was born just after the Moors Murders. Infamous murders which happened not too far from where we lived.

 

[kittenattack]

For those of you with adult children - was there so much knowledge about predatory adults and children with knives? I lived close to school so walking wasn’t an issue but was out working nights in a bar as a glass collector when I was 17. I wouldn’t let my kid do what I did - (as I was exposed to creepy predatory adults and hadn’t a clue).

*Im not judging what anyone has done, but getting a balance between safety and independence is hard and I am struggling with it.

Yeah, we all knew about predatory adults, but we lived in a safe area and both my kids knew the rules about strangers. There was no school knife crime or anything like that going on. I think it was easier having boys as I worried less about sexual harassment or assault. If anyone had tried it on with my eldest they'd have ended off worse

 

[Baby Giraffe]

When I was a kid, we stayed out all day and I spent a lot of time in the local 'woods'. They weren't really woods, they were part of a local farm and a herd of cows grazed there. We weren't allowed to go in there but I loved playing along a stream there so they couldn't keep me out. You had to run if the farmer saw you but that rarely happened. My mum stopped walking me to school at about six and I went on my own for the rest of school.

But when my kids were little, my mother became neurotic over their safety. She constantly berated me, saying it wasn't like when I was a child, and it wasn't safe for kids to go out playing. I used to roll my eyes but I did keep a close eye on my kids and they definitely never had the freedom that I'd had.

It dawned on me years later that for all my mum went on about how safe it had been when I was a kid, I was born just after the Moors Murders. Infamous murders which happened not too far from where we lived.

There have always been dodgy people about but it wasn't talked about so much. The two biggest things that have changed since I was a kid in the 70s is that there is an awful lot more traffic on the roads and because more kids are taken in cars then there is less safety in numbers. I used to often walk the long way round as it meant being with my mates for longer and I enjoyed chatting to them as I walked. Was thinking the other day, the biggest danger I was aware of as a kid was taking the shortcut over the railway line (not a major one but still), we all did it and nobody seemed to think it was a worry - note that this was in primary school too so guess we were about 8 or 9ish maybe

 

[Scotch Mist]

I can't remember if this video was posted before but it's worth a watch. Piers Morgan being a twit and Kellie Jay having none of his crap.

I love Zuby on this channel. He's a fabulous ally who states that all the people in the public eye going along with this cult are cowards.

 

[Glortard]

When I was a kid, we stayed out all day and I spent a lot of time in the local 'woods'. They weren't really woods, they were part of a local farm and a herd of cows grazed there. We weren't allowed to go in there but I loved playing along a stream there so they couldn't keep me out. You had to run if the farmer saw you but that rarely happened. My mum stopped walking me to school at about six and I went on my own for the rest of school.

But when my kids were little, my mother became neurotic over their safety. She constantly berated me, saying it wasn't like when I was a child, and it wasn't safe for kids to go out playing. I used to roll my eyes but I did keep a close eye on my kids and they definitely never had the freedom that I'd had.

It dawned on me years later that for all my mum went on about how safe it had been when I was a kid, I was born just after the Moors Murders. Infamous murders which happened not too far from where we lived.

Even now my partner's mother will phone me when my eldest who is nearly 21 visits her about just over a mile away to let us know he is leaving and to remind him to phone her when he's home. As my partner says when she was 16 and her sister was 18 her mother moved to South Africa and left them on their own. My daughter always cracks up as well as she likes her independence and to walk along to visit her gran....but she will often basically come and collect her sometimes.

Personally I think we where a bit OTT with our children's safety and was hoping that college our two oldest have went for the last 2 years would have helped them. Sadly Covid largely put paid to that.

 

[Ruby’s mum]

Ignore the Lionesses 8-0 victory last night, we have an even more stunning and brave person playing women's football

Meet Cheshire FA's new trans champion who was once banned from playing

Pippa Henry 'was male for 47 years' and at one point was banned from playing football

www.cheshire-live.co.uk

Lived 47 years as a man and then, at 52, playing on a women's team.

View attachment 1410933

Help me out here, I’m having difficulty spotting the stunning and brave one

 

[klarakluckbag]

Help me out here, I’m having difficulty spotting the stunning and brave one

We'll give you a clue. It's the one wearing glasses. And size 11 boots

 

[GladiatorReady]

She's still not having it.

 

[Ruby’s mum]

We'll give you a clue. It's the one wearing glasses. And size 11 boots

He’s got the boobs but sadly the male pattern baldness is a bit of a give away.

 

[fizzyjerk]

She's still not having it.

Well it's true. That documentary was mildly amusing, if a little unbalanced, but totally undone by his complete and utter glee at Roe v Wade being overturned.