Thank you - I cant quote your post but leoladyxo that is gaslighting.
tskiry56 I will definitely take a look at your blog. I am not experiencing any physical abuse nor do I think I ever would. This guy is actually an all right nice guy (I know thats how narcissists usually present) but yeah during arguments he will always say its me and I am the reason he behaves how he does etc. Says i am too over opininated - I literally cannot say anything without him accusing me of moaning or being argumentative.
Not read the full thread but based on just this post I'd say get rid. I've just seen briefly another post that you've been together five months, time for him to go.
It'll only get worse unfortunately. Please don't put up with this behaviour.
Him saying you're too opinionated is his way to erode at your confidence, bet you have been second guessing yourself right? The fact he says it's your fault too that he behaves that way is bullshit, he behaves like that because he's an idiot, not because of you. He's passing the blame on to you. Not good.
Sorry if my post is a bit harsh, I don't intend it to be but whilst you're still early on in the relationship you can get out without kids or marriage being involved.
it’s having a massive effect on my mental health etc. I am an emotional person and quite an anxious person anyway so all this just makes me 10x worse. He keeps saying he will only reply to me if I’m nice etc but I am nice. I’m just never allowed to say anything that calls him out on his behaviour. I know I need to get out but I feel like I can’t because I don’t want to but deep down I know I need to if that makes sense. I feel so weak x
The reason he doesn't like being called out on his behaviour is because he knows he's being an asshole. It's emotional abuse the silent treatment you're being given when you're apparently 'not being nice'.
He's training you to not question him, to never call him out on his behaviour and to do as he says. This is not right. It's emotional abuse.
I was with a man very similar, he would give me the silent treatment after an argument or heated discussion, I was too scared to call him out on his behaviour. He would say things like 'I'll come see you only if you're a good girl' which meant not to question his behaviour. It was horrible. It affected my mental health and on the days where he was ignoring me I'd be going crazy with anxiety. I thankfully saw the light and fucked him off after 6 months of it.
You deserve so so much better. How amazing will you feel when you don't have to worry about this man? You won't need to worry about stepping on eggshells around him, you can be free of his pathetic behaviour. Please consider leaving him. You will thank your future self.