Food and Drink #32

[Hollaaa]

Hi ninnies - jumping into this thread because I think you’re all so smashing and kind and I am seeking advice.
Basically I drink too much but can’t admit to myself I’m an alcoholic, but while pissed the other night I got it into my head I’d do a dry October. I did this back in 2018 for Dry January and enjoyed it so much I lasted over three months without a drink (maybe that shows I’m not an alcoholic?!).
My motivation this time round is to lose a little weight, sleep better, and feel better too - I’m sick of waking up feeling like tit and doing the bare minimum at work all day.
Anyway the advice I’m asking from Frauen is because I know I have good intentions but inevitably I’ll be tempted to get trashed and I wonder if any of you have methods of stamping down on that or convincing yourself you mustn’t drink. I can’t chuck out all the drink in my house because I live in a dry country so the booze we have is precious and needed for parties! Sorry this is probably a rambly post and yes I am hungover but I really want to do at least 31 days without a drink and you’re all so fab about this in the JM threads. Kisses

Distract distract distract yourself.
Lie and say you are on antibiotics if you are out and people are pestering you to drink, it's just easier and I think it's socially accepted shorthand for duck off x as far as drinking is concerned now.
Chat to the ninnies on here.
Podcasts/films.
Clean your kitchen or bathroom.
Stupid games on phone.
Cup of tea and phone call to friend/relative.
Read.
Knit/crochet/sew/draw - busy hands.
Big walk.
Make morning plans. Weekly supermarket shop on a Saturday at 8am = have to get up and about, can't buy drink (Scotland, anyway).
Do it as part of a sponsorship thing if that floats your boat (it doesn't really motivate me) or any other organised campaign. One Year No Beer do challenges that are less than a year long.

 

[Witchfinder Sargeant]

Hi ninnies - jumping into this thread because I think you’re all so smashing and kind and I am seeking advice.
Basically I drink too much but can’t admit to myself I’m an alcoholic, but while pissed the other night I got it into my head I’d do a dry October. I did this back in 2018 for Dry January and enjoyed it so much I lasted over three months without a drink (maybe that shows I’m not an alcoholic?!).
My motivation this time round is to lose a little weight, sleep better, and feel better too - I’m sick of waking up feeling like tit and doing the bare minimum at work all day.
Anyway the advice I’m asking from Frauen is because I know I have good intentions but inevitably I’ll be tempted to get trashed and I wonder if any of you have methods of stamping down on that or convincing yourself you mustn’t drink. I can’t chuck out all the drink in my house because I live in a dry country so the booze we have is precious and needed for parties! Sorry this is probably a rambly post and yes I am hungover but I really want to do at least 31 days without a drink and you’re all so fab about this in the JM threads. Kisses

Have plenty of alternatives in - ingredients for nice mocktails, kombucha, AF beers if you can get those where you are. Even just water. Anything to break that "there's nothing to drink, I'll just go to the shop for wine."
Change your routine - if you normally come in from work and pour yourself a drink, come in from work and do 15 minutes of meditation or yoga or something else instead, to break that association.
If you have a glass of wine while cooking, have an AF drink instead.
Take a selfie now, in all your hungover puffiness and then take another one at the end of October so you can compare the two.
Sobriety tracker apps are really good, watching that streak develop and not wanting to break it, and the little dopamine hits from achievement "badges".

 

[Whaa?]

Try putting the booze someplace inaccessible so it would be a faff to go and get it. In garage if you have it, loft space, under a pile of other storage. Then get in alternatives as others have mentioned so there is always something on hand.

 

[SmolWarrior]

What a nasty, vicious canal of trolls you all are
Thanks so much. Great ideas there and I will implement them. I like the selfie suggestion. I’ll keep this mithering little corner of the internet updated!

ETA Now duck off! x

 

[Sideboard Bob]

@Sideboard Bob I'm getting all the love from my Pooh. It's Caturday night.
View attachment 1618022

Yay! What a sweet, loving face. I don’t care what anyone says, cats really do know when you need some extra love, they can be so caring. Happy Caturday Night to you both

 

[Witchfinder Sargeant]

What a nasty, vicious canal of trolls you all are
Thanks so much. Great ideas there and I will implement them. I like the selfie suggestion. I’ll keep this mithering little corner of the internet updated!

ETA Now duck off! x

drink lots of water - it will help with the bloating and puffiness and dehydration.

 

[ForgettyBetty]

Sorry for not doing a separate thread for this but wondered if I can get some advice from you bunch of ninnies?

Spoiler: Mental health

for a very long time, at least 10 years, I have felt ‘low’ like I’m just never really happy or free from an internal burden of negative thoughts. I am constantly in a low level of anxiety and frequently have suicidal thoughts (no plans, just a feeling of I’d rather be dead than alive if that makes sense.) I’ve had ‘proper’ diagnosed mental health problems previously when I was younger and have had a tonne of therapy which has been helpful to a degree but I just feel kinda stuck now. Like my life isn’t impacted by the way I feel in the sense that I am very physically active, I have a decent diet, I sleep well, have hobbies, can work, see friends etc etc but I just have this constant weight over me all the time. So I feel like I don’t have depression or anxiety because it’s not about anything specific and I have spoken to the GP and they just prescribe me medication without any hesitation but I don’t like the idea if medication because if I feel like this all the time then am I going to have to be medicated for the rest of my life?! The main impact this whole thing has on me is that I can be quite grumpy and overwhelmed because I’m so in my head all the time and to be in my head but also try and be present is absolutely exhausting sometimes.

Sorry that’s so long, I was just wondering if any enlightened fraus might have an idea of what the heck is wrong with me and what I can do about it?!

I want to be able to, although I'm deeper in the pit myself these days (due to reasons). I have some ideas, and will try to get back with them soon- didn't want you to feel alone in the meantime x

 

[kachoochoo]

Spoiler: twitter merail

just popping in to say that there's a bit of weirdness on twitter, but I am not in that conversation and I have reported a certain person's tweets where they've posted my pictures from here. idgaf if that makes me a hypocrite. If you don't know what I'm talking about, please ignore me

 

[Toffee finger]

Spoiler: twitter merail

just popping in to say that there's a bit of weirdness on twitter, but I am not in that conversation and I have reported a certain person's tweets where they've posted my pictures from here. idgaf if that makes me a hypocrite. If you don't know what I'm talking about, please ignore me

Spoiler

It’s not strange to have a laugh and post photos with your online friends about a mutual interest. It does make me laugh that those posting on twitter think they’re somehow better than those posting on forums. I mean, whatever our reasons are, we’re clearly all invested in tattle/MT/fraus. Tweeting frequently isn’t more superior than posting here. I know once you post something online it’s there forever but it’s still unnecessary to take a photo like that and post it elsewhere IMO.

 

[Hollaaa]

@kachoochoo I've just remembered that it's Midnights month. I'm excited!

 

[bowiethesdmn]

Distract distract distract yourself.
Lie and say you are on antibiotics if you are out and people are pestering you to drink, it's just easier and I think it's socially accepted shorthand for duck off x as far as drinking is concerned now.
Chat to the ninnies on here.
Podcasts/films.
Clean your kitchen or bathroom.
Stupid games on phone.
Cup of tea and phone call to friend/relative.
Read.
Knit/crochet/sew/draw - busy hands.
Big walk.
Make morning plans. Weekly supermarket shop on a Saturday at 8am = have to get up and about, can't buy drink (Scotland, anyway).
Do it as part of a sponsorship thing if that floats your boat (it doesn't really motivate me) or any other organised campaign. One Year No Beer do challenges that are less than a year long.

All great advice, and it seems people care a lot less about what others do or do not drink these days than early in the 00s. Good luck, am doing my own Stoptober too albeit not for booze. And it starts tomorrow because I didn't realise today was the first. So err...

Finding it hard to catch up due to doing a massive phone chaos and ending up with a Windows phone for which support ended in 2019 so all I can do is look around online, phone and text people. It routinely throws a shitfit and crashes Tattle so I just wanted to thank whichever Frau it was who recommended the Lidl canned vegetarian chilli a thread or so ago! Had a can the other night and it was lovely, wouldn't even have crossed my mind as summat to look for if you hadn't mentioned it so once again, thank you wise mystery Frau

 

[KebabGirl]

Spoiler: twitter merail

just popping in to say that there's a bit of weirdness on twitter, but I am not in that conversation and I have reported a certain person's tweets where they've posted my pictures from here. idgaf if that makes me a hypocrite. If you don't know what I'm talking about, please ignore me

Spoiler: Reply

It's a very odd thread. Saw part of it when I was awake in the night and couldn't quite process / understand a lot of it. I hope you are ok, it's just a weird thing to do.

 

[HotesTilaire]

@Mcm sorry to hear about your Dad, the journey will be brutal but worthwhile.

@veryfondoftea

Spoiler: reply

I think I will be on AD’s forever, but I’m ok with that. Better than feeling like tit and getting suicidal, for me. What leapt out at me from your post is that you say you feel grumpy and overwhelmed. I’m no qualified counsellor but I used to be grumpy and overwhelmed because I probably have ADHD.
I’m not saying that’s what you have, just that I could never get out of people pleasing/overwork/over effort then crash/burnout/dissatisfaction because I didn’t know what the problem was. I was constantly overwhelmed by life. And grouchy. I found out that I was effectively jogging on the spot, whereas others were standing. No wonder I kept crashing!
I think it would be worth you looking at getting psychotherapy to try and work out what the underlying issue is. There is some issue going on, would be my guess, and you wouldn’t necessarily know what it is.

And praise be, we live in enlightened times! When I started counselling I had a whole CBT course on trying to stop being a perfectionist/high achiever. I might have looked like a perfectionist, but actually I’m not. I’m just trying to do a half decent job that doesn’t result in disappointment, because if it’s half cocked and I have to revise something, I get lost in it and make it worse.

 

[kachoochoo]

@kachoochoo I've just remembered that it's Midnights month. I'm excited!

I know! excited too! Taylor's looking like she's gonna set her hat on fire here, like

Spoiler: reply to other stuff

i'm fine lads. those tweeters are just really weird and wrong about everything and I'll leave it there now

 

[Switchstreetz]

I haven't seen what you're referring to but I'm sorry you're having to deal with that Kacha

I always understood the "keep it on tattle" rule as:

1/. Not making an account in same username on a different website and using that to harass the subject of the threads

2/. Not coming on here posting screenshots being like "look what I said to them on twitter/insta/whatever"

Basically not to paint this site as a trolling hub - the press already do a good enough job trying that.

I don't think FOI requests/providing info to podcasts undermine this - it's great that newspapers and podcasts etc are starting to pick up on Jack's grifting, she can dismiss us and people on social media as trolls but the more momentum the truth gains, the less she can cover her ass with lies and changing her story.

I do think it's a shame the amount of animosity between Twitter users and tattle users though - we all have the same end goal and I don't know why or when it started to feel like we're all so at odds with each other.

I closed my twitter down, and nearly deleted my tattle account, a few months back after I received a DM on Twitter that was basically like "you're going to get banned if you keep posting on twitter so make a choice" even though I barely used Twitter and never interacted with Jack.

I took it as a threat/controlling behaviour and my initial thought was just kind of fine I'll stop using both then but then I cooled my head and realised actually I'd miss the canal, so I came crawling back To be fair I never bothered to reply to see what that person's intentions were I just immediately shut the account down so I probably acted too rashly.

Life without Twitter doomscrolling really is so much better for your sanity though, so they did me a favour, whether it was deliberately or not lol.

Spoiler: Just a suggestion but

I think if someone takes posts off here from a user and puts them on tiktok/twitter/Instagram etc and the tattle user is uncomfortable with that then they should take them down.

Maybe any tattle posts put on Twitter/wherever could also be squiggled like we do for them?

At the same time, if we put something on here from a squig who's not a blue tick/famous and they indicate on their social media that they're not ok with it we should respect that and take those posts down (even if squiggled) and avoid screenshotting/discussing that user in future. I know these are both public forums so nothing is stopping either side taking each other's posts, but that way we're both respecting each other.

Edit: just realised I sound like her sorry

 

[LennyBriscoe]

Sorry for not doing a separate thread for this but wondered if I can get some advice from you bunch of ninnies?

Spoiler: Mental health

for a very long time, at least 10 years, I have felt ‘low’ like I’m just never really happy or free from an internal burden of negative thoughts. I am constantly in a low level of anxiety and frequently have suicidal thoughts (no plans, just a feeling of I’d rather be dead than alive if that makes sense.) I’ve had ‘proper’ diagnosed mental health problems previously when I was younger and have had a tonne of therapy which has been helpful to a degree but I just feel kinda stuck now. Like my life isn’t impacted by the way I feel in the sense that I am very physically active, I have a decent diet, I sleep well, have hobbies, can work, see friends etc etc but I just have this constant weight over me all the time. So I feel like I don’t have depression or anxiety because it’s not about anything specific and I have spoken to the GP and they just prescribe me medication without any hesitation but I don’t like the idea if medication because if I feel like this all the time then am I going to have to be medicated for the rest of my life?! The main impact this whole thing has on me is that I can be quite grumpy and overwhelmed because I’m so in my head all the time and to be in my head but also try and be present is absolutely exhausting sometimes.

Sorry that’s so long, I was just wondering if any enlightened fraus might have an idea of what the heck is wrong with me and what I can do about it?!

Spoiler: Reply

I just wanted to send you lots of love. I could have written the part about carrying on but still feeling low. I’ve had depression for a lot of years, I’ve never really had therapy as such but CBT didn’t work for me however I have come to terms with the fact that I probably will be medicated forever. Not everyone is the same though. Because I do take anti-ds (Amitriptylene) my mind kind of says to you “just think how much better you’d feel if you did take them”.

I always think as well you need a good GP who you can talk to about the best one for you, what you should expect to see happen/side effects etc. I would recommend trying them, just to see if your head gets lighter and you don’t feel so physically and mentally tired all the time. What you’re describing is a pretty big impact - you don’t have to be unable to get out of bed every day for it to be ‘bad’ and you deserve to be happy.

And life evolves - you may feel you don’t need them at some point but if you do decide to go for it, try and not think about the long term. Try and think a day at a time and in 6 months time say, the nights will be getting lighter again, the weather will get better and you can see how you feel? (That’s assuming of course you’re in Britain which).

Good luck

 

[traumatised sideboard]

I actually saved the perfect Sabrina meme this morning before knowing we had hats. I've been experiencing an unusual amount of coincidences recently but this is the first one that's actually been useful. Praise beans!

Spoiler: smol me-rail update

The new medication isn't really helping yet other than making me both very hungry and very tired. I've got phone calls from the crisis team over the weekend and on Monday I'll be referred to a team whose specific purpose is to prevent hospital admissions by providing more intensive support. I'm also going to have a review with a doctor to look at meds again. Feeling very slopgoblin-esque as I even had a malicious welfare check from the police (it was the mental health team who called them, in a non-malicious way, the same way you might break someone's bones (potentially obscure other thread reference)). Writing this I realise things look pretty wild, maybe I should be panicking more? Nobody needs to worry about my safety btw, it's all in hand. Thanks for listening, you horrid faceless ninnies.

 

[Falkor]

I know we're a thread of cat lovers, but can I show you how delighted Senior Dog is with her jumper? It's a tiny bit snug, but for warming her up for 10 minutes after a wet walk it does the job beautifully and I hope will stretch over a couple of wears. Will try the next size up for the next one, but that's probably going to be huge on her!

 

[CabalofBolorneaise]

I think what confused me was when I posted about the possibility of contacting an organisation associated with Jack to complain my post was deleted. Again, I'm not hating on you, just a bit confused.

Was the org working with Jack? I know previously it seemed like the distinction between contacting podcast hosts who weren't working with Jack and an org who was was that contacting the org was effectively (indirectly) contacting Jack.

But I agree the lines on the latter have become a bit more blurred recently - the FOI requests directly asking about work with her ie the ONS, the questions to the TT, even the veganuary/viggle stuff.

 

[Emmapism]

I think anything that's done in the name of information gathering is more than reasonable. It's all about the motivation behind it tbh.

I think with a lot of Jack's brand partners or talk organisers.......that's on them. If they haven't done their due diligence and hired her then we (very rightly) should have nothing to do with that.

The ONS stuff is just fact checking. I do think there was a point when people were saying they were gonna do freedom of information requests on every little thing. Even stuff that you wouldn't FOI