Ex - Slimming World Disordered Eating Recovery

[JustWonderingIf]

Following a discussion on Slimming World #4
This is a thread to talk about with like minds who are leaving SW for good and switching to more sustainable and healthy diets.

Many of us who have done SW know it promotes unhealthy eating habits and fear foods. The aim of this thread is to create a space for ex members to rant and ask for advice and support in undoing SW habits.

Whether your lingering issues are -
- fear foods (i.e olive oil)
- constantly looking at food as synful
- still measuring cereals, bread and cheeses and scared to break the habit.
- blaming yourself when you have a gain
- scared of exercise due to a consultant telling you it stops you losing weight.
Or any number of ways SW may affect still affect your diet after you've left..

Feel free to share what you are struggling with or what has helped you take back control of your diet.
Together we can put syns in the bin for good.

 

[Robbie09]

Following a discussion on Slimming World #4
This is a thread to talk about with like minds who are leaving SW for good and switching to more sustainable and healthy diets.

Many of us who have done SW know it promotes unhealthy eating habits and fear foods. The aim of this thread is to create a space for ex members to rant and ask for advice and support in undoing SW habits.

Whether your lingering issues are -
- fear foods (i.e olive oil)
- constantly looking at food as synful
- still measuring cereals, bread and cheeses and scared to break the habit.
- blaming yourself when you have a gain
- scared of exercise due to a consultant telling you it stops you losing weight.
Or any number of ways SW may affect still affect your diet after you've left..

Feel free to share what you are struggling with or what has helped you take back control of your diet.
Together we can put syns in the bin for good.

This is a great idea and hopefully will be a huge help

 

[Snippysnips]

I couldn't do slimming world, my mums been on an off for years with it but I done it once an was like nope, I found myself starving most of the time, getting angry because I wanted somthing but it was too many syns an I couldn't, feeling guilty because I had went over a syn or two then fully blaming any weight gain because of that

What I couldn't understand either is how some foods would be classed as "free" an I could eat as much as that as I wanted but others were a syn an yet there was little to no difference in calorie intake if I ate a ton of free food compared to somthing that was syns

In the end I just went to counting calories an watching what I took in compared to what I burnt off, started to enjoy food again an I never stopped myself from having what I wanted, I just limited how much of somthing that was high calories at any one time, dropped all the weight in a slow an more healthy way an have kept it off

 

[JustWonderingIf]

In the end I just went to counting calories an watching what I took in compared to what I burnt off, started to enjoy food again an I never stopped myself from having what I wanted, I just limited how much of somthing that was high calories at any one time, dropped all the weight in a slow an more healthy way an have kept it off

CC is definitely the way to allow yourself foods banned on SW.
You mention your mum has been on and off for years, the longer people do SW the harder it is to leave the habits and mindset behind.
Its difficult to go from eating unlimited potatoes for example to having to weigh and measure them.
To get out of the mindset cooking oil is the devil.

Its great you switched to CC but I feel you found it easier because you never really got on with SW.
Unfortunately some people don't find it so easy.

 

[Snippysnips]

CC is definitely the way to allow yourself foods banned on SW.
You mention your mum has been on and off for years, the longer people do SW the harder it is to leave the habits and mindset behind.
Its difficult to go from eating unlimited potatoes for example to having to weigh and measure them.
To get out of the mindset cooking oil is the devil.

Its great you switched to CC but I feel you found it easier because you never really got on with SW.
Unfortunately some people don't find it so easy.

I feel like the more you deny yourself somthing the more you are eventually going to cave an binge it

It was a few months I did SW for so probably found it easier to just ditch it, ironically the only time my mum did lose weight is when she was off it an done the CC with me for my brothers wedding as we both wanted the weight off, when she stopped she put it all back on again an out all the years she's done SW on an off she's constantly been heavy throughout it all

 

[smooth_operator33]

love this thread - thank you

 

[Tove_drew]

I didn’t do SW but I did do WW twice. Once as a teen when frankly I was at a slim weight but my mother brought me along as I wanted to lose weight. Looking back I can’t believe she did that but lot of the ethos and habits were around me from childhood.

I went again when I was in my early 20s as I had gain around 2 stone. That time I was only there for 6 months some of which was maintence but what I learnt lingered since as I often returned to the habits/ tips. It definitely warped my relationship with certain foods.

The community itself was quiet toxic and reinforced disordered eating. Everything was about tricking the system and big losses each week. I stupidly went along with it all and lost weight at a fast rate. I was effectively pushed out of the meetings towards the end. While in queue for my weight in, another person saw me and began to loudly criticise me for being there as I was “slim enough” and my mere presence was mocking her. She told the woman leading the meeting I needed to stop losing weight and it wasn’t right that I was even there. Without asking me how I felt the leader then immediately told me “you’re not going to lose any more, you’re on maintence from now on”. This was in front of everyone. Now I wasn’t even at my goal weight and my goal wasn’t to be underweight but bam in the middle of my BMI. Years later I know BMI is often meaningless but I felt so hurt that day for not being respected. After a few more meetings I left mostly because I didn’t feel welcome by the other members. I felt bad for making that member uncomfortable but I needed support also. I ended up skipping meals desperately trying to keep it off.

More than a decade later, I have tried many ways to repair my relationship with food. I was vegan for nearly 5 years because I thought it would take out some of my guilt around food. Eventually I got seriously ill with covid and suddenly craved meat. I began seeing an intuitive eating specialist last year and it’s been great for me to focus on how my body feels with different foods and movements.

My goal now is to lead a healthy balanced lifestyle where no food is off limits by listening to my body. It’s hard because I still wish to lose weight and I know long term I will balance out where I should be. I began to calorie count in the last few months which I know is a slippery slope but I’m learning basically what recipes work and listening to my body because my long term hope is to forget cals.

I would really recommend initiative eating to any other SW/WW disordered eaters.

 

[Mab1994]

“you’re not going to lose any more, you’re on maintence from now on”. This was in front of everyone.

What

 

[Tove_drew]

What

Thank you!!! I was made to feel like a little girl that the grown ups had to disciple. It was the opposite of body empowerment! I did try and explain I’m not on goal yet and I am small framed etc but she just tried to win me over by suggested I submit my new goal status (by I guess resetting the goal) to the weight watcher magazine (not in a million years pal).

 

[Ups27]

I remember one of my friends was a veggie, but ate meat she didn’t want in Nando’s because of the syns in veggie wraps

 

[JustWonderingIf]

I didn’t do SW but I did do WW twice. Once as a teen when frankly I was at a slim weight but my mother brought me along as I wanted to lose weight. Looking back I can’t believe she did that but lot of the ethos and habits were around me from childhood.

I went again when I was in my early 20s as I had gain around 2 stone. That time I was only there for 6 months some of which was maintence but what I learnt lingered since as I often returned to the habits/ tips. It definitely warped my relationship with certain foods.

The community itself was quiet toxic and reinforced disordered eating. Everything was about tricking the system and big losses each week. I stupidly went along with it all and lost weight at a fast rate. I was effectively pushed out of the meetings towards the end. While in queue for my weight in, another person saw me and began to loudly criticise me for being there as I was “slim enough” and my mere presence was mocking her. She told the woman leading the meeting I needed to stop losing weight and it wasn’t right that I was even there. Without asking me how I felt the leader then immediately told me “you’re not going to lose any more, you’re on maintence from now on”. This was in front of everyone. Now I wasn’t even at my goal weight and my goal wasn’t to be underweight but bam in the middle of my BMI. Years later I know BMI is often meaningless but I felt so hurt that day for not being respected. After a few more meetings I left mostly because I didn’t feel welcome by the other members. I felt bad for making that member uncomfortable but I needed support also. I ended up skipping meals desperately trying to keep it off.

More than a decade later, I have tried many ways to repair my relationship with food. I was vegan for nearly 5 years because I thought it would take out some of my guilt around food. Eventually I got seriously ill with covid and suddenly craved meat. I began seeing an intuitive eating specialist last year and it’s been great for me to focus on how my body feels with different foods and movements.

My goal now is to lead a healthy balanced lifestyle where no food is off limits by listening to my body. It’s hard because I still wish to lose weight and I know long term I will balance out where I should be. I began to calorie count in the last few months which I know is a slippery slope but I’m learning basically what recipes work and listening to my body because my long term hope is to forget cals.

I would really recommend initiative eating to any other SW/WW disordered eaters.

I think intuative eating is something that is brilliant if its right for you and is one of the most psychologically healthy ways to eat. Food should be guilt free and enjoyed without shame.


However, I also think its something to approach with caution if you don't have a grip on binge eating or emotional eating.
If you're in a emotional or binge eating mindset it can be easy to convince yourself that you're 'listening to your body' by eating a 12" pizza, cheesy chips, chicken nuggets and a tub of ben and jerrys in one sitting.
When really you're still in a binge cycle and those feelings of guilt will come back as you know you've over ate.

 

[Tove_drew]

I feel like the more you deny yourself somthing the more you are eventually going to cave an binge it

I saw a dietitian recently online say when it comes to her kids, if they get fixated on say “Mars bars” she’ll actually create unlimited access to them and finds they usually run out of interest in a few weeks.

Knocking “treats” off their pedestal really does seem to help. I have that with dominoes pizza which would end up with ordering dominoes only to get pain due to the large amount of lactose/gluten.

I recognised this pattern and how it would not only knock me back in mood but literally gave me indigestion for days. So now I go every Monday to get a big slice (or two) of pizza at a really great place near me. It’s completely stopped my dominos fixation!!!

 

[JustWonderingIf]

I remember one of my friends was a veggie, but ate meat she didn’t want in Nando’s because of the syns in veggie wraps

That is the worst example of the toxic SW mindset i've heard in a long time.
Being so scared of syns that they were willing to compromise their vegetarian principles....just wow...really awful place to be mentally.

 

[Tove_drew]

I think intuative eating is something that is brilliant if its right for you and is one of the most psychologically healthy ways to eat. Food should be guilt free and enjoyed without shame.


However, I also think its something to approach with caution if you don't have a grip on binge eating or emotional eating.
If you're in a emotional or binge eating mindset it can be easy to convince yourself that you're 'listening to your body' by eating a 12" pizza, cheesy chips, chicken nuggets and a tub of ben and jerrys in one sitting.
When really you're still in a binge cycle and those feelings of guilt will come back as you know you've over ate.

I think it’s definitely a trust fall. The first few weeks of COMPLETE FREEDOM was crazy, trying all the “banned foods”.

However I was takes notes of how I felt. That’s when I realised gluten was not my friend! I could only handle so much and the same for dairy. I still mess up and over do it here or there but when the focus became how I felt not just during but after eating, I saw a big improvement! I noticed if my lunch didn’t have enough fat, I had no energy that afternoon etc.

It’s been a process. Yes my weight did go up but now it’s going down and I don’t feel the same fear with food or lack of trust in myself.

i think it also really helps to have a professional to guide us

 

[JustWonderingIf]

I saw a dietitian recently online say when it comes to her kids, if they get fixated on say “Mars bars” she’ll actually create unlimited access to them and finds they usually run out of interest in a few weeks.

Knocking “treats” off their pedestal really does seem to help. I have that with dominoes pizza which would end up with ordering dominoes only to get pain due to the large amount of lactose/gluten.

I recognised this pattern and how it would not only knock me back in mood but literally gave me indigestion for days. So now I go every Monday to get a big slice (or two) of pizza at a really great place near me. It’s completely stopped my dominos fixation!!!

There is something to this. When i've been really in a bad place with my emotional and binge eating I eventually feel 'takeawayed out' and just don't fancy them anymore.
One time I stuck to SW ridgidly for 6 months and lost 4 stone. Then I had a takeaway and it was like giving a alchoholic a pint in all honesty I was back to binging them within a week and gained 5 stone back eventually.
I find CC better as I can allow myself to find balance and not deny myself for months on end which leads to binging.

I think it’s definitely a trust fall. The first few weeks of COMPLETE FREEDOM was crazy, trying all the “banned foods”.

However I was takes notes of how I felt. That’s when I realised gluten was not my friend! I could only handle so much and the same for dairy. I still mess up and over do it here or there but when the focus became how I felt not just during but after eating, I saw a big improvement! I noticed if my lunch didn’t have enough fat, I had no energy that afternoon etc.

It’s been a process. Yes my weight did go up but now it’s going down and I don’t feel the same fear with food or lack of trust in myself.

i think it also really helps to have a professional to guide us

This sounds really interesting. Do you have any books you recommend?

 

[confusedlady]

have been a yoyo dieter for years and did join SW and WW at different points of my late teens and early 20s, i am almost 30 now and have been recovering from disordered eating for about 3 years and i just wanted to throw some tips that really helped me (these may not work for everyone and i'd love to see other tips so i can continue my journey!):

• joining therapy!
  • this is incredibly privileged as i pay for my therapy and i have no children and don't pay an extortionate amount to live because of where i live. i tried a few therapists through the NHS and CBT really did not gel with me, i needed to address the roots of my issues.
  • i didn't join therapy initially for food related issues but once i was there it just came about that a lot of my emotional eating stemmed from not knowing how to cope with emotions (even positive ones!), i still sometimes emotionally eat now as i know ultimately it's just food and if i'm having a really hard time i deserve to cope and get through it in whatever way i can.
• not engaging in diet talk with others
  • in the midst of my disordered eating i needed to distance myself from diet talk wherever possible and working in an office it's literally impossible to do that, if someone talked about their diet and mentioned a meal i would focus on that meal and create a conversation around it.
    "oh for my diet i made sweet potato brownies"
    "oh i didn't know you liked to bake?"
  • this was a super good way to distance myself from the diet itself but let the other person indulge a bit in what they want to talk about
• intuitive eating
  • this will not work for everyone but it worked very well for me. i read the book and the very basic principle is initially you just let your body have whatever it wants and my god was i ravenous. i think for about a year i just consumed and consumed and consumed and granted i gained quite a bit of weight, but then my brain just settled and all i wanted was a big load of veggies
  • once you stop depriving yourself of food and labelling food as good and bad you can start understand what food actually makes you feel - if i eat pizza 2 days in a row i feel really low energy and sluggish, so i try to increase my veggies the next day! it helps because i am listening to what my body wants and i want my body to have energy and i want to feel upbeat, so i'll learn what works for me and what doesn't
• exercise!
  • one of the things that frustrates me about weight loss accounts is the ENTIRE focus is on weight loss and that means it's just about calories and a lot of the time there isn't a mention on exercise, i've never been an active person even from when i was a child and then i decided one day to go for a run and something just clicked? i kept running and like oh my god the mental clarity it gave me!
  • the benefits of exercise tend to boil down to what it can do to your weight but my weight hasn't really shifted but i feel a gazillion times better when i am consistently moving my body in a way that is fun for me
• my weight and what i eat do not affect my moral compass
  • understanding that whatever diet i've done and whatever i put into my body and whatever shape my body is does not affect who i am as a person is huge to me. in life your body will change because of literally everything and anything, and that does not mean you're a better or worse person because of it
  • when i used to binge i felt so shameful and guilty and sad and now if i slip up and binge i just look after myself, i deserve to heal and just because i ate 3 meals does not make me a bad person and does not change me inside

sorry for the long post, i know how hard it is to be all consumed by these dieting programs and to know that your weight can affect so much - i hope this post is even a little bit insightful?

 

[JustWonderingIf]

have been a yoyo dieter for years and did join SW and WW at different points of my late teens and early 20s, i am almost 30 now and have been recovering from disordered eating for about 3 years and i just wanted to throw some tips that really helped me (these may not work for everyone and i'd love to see other tips so i can continue my journey!):

• joining therapy!
  • this is incredibly privileged as i pay for my therapy and i have no children and don't pay an extortionate amount to live because of where i live. i tried a few therapists through the NHS and CBT really did not gel with me, i needed to address the roots of my issues.
  • i didn't join therapy initially for food related issues but once i was there it just came about that a lot of my emotional eating stemmed from not knowing how to cope with emotions (even positive ones!), i still sometimes emotionally eat now as i know ultimately it's just food and if i'm having a really hard time i deserve to cope and get through it in whatever way i can.
• not engaging in diet talk with others
  • in the midst of my disordered eating i needed to distance myself from diet talk wherever possible and working in an office it's literally impossible to do that, if someone talked about their diet and mentioned a meal i would focus on that meal and create a conversation around it.
    "oh for my diet i made sweet potato brownies"
    "oh i didn't know you liked to bake?"
  • this was a super good way to distance myself from the diet itself but let the other person indulge a bit in what they want to talk about
• intuitive eating
  • this will not work for everyone but it worked very well for me. i read the book and the very basic principle is initially you just let your body have whatever it wants and my god was i ravenous. i think for about a year i just consumed and consumed and consumed and granted i gained quite a bit of weight, but then my brain just settled and all i wanted was a big load of veggies
  • once you stop depriving yourself of food and labelling food as good and bad you can start understand what food actually makes you feel - if i eat pizza 2 days in a row i feel really low energy and sluggish, so i try to increase my veggies the next day! it helps because i am listening to what my body wants and i want my body to have energy and i want to feel upbeat, so i'll learn what works for me and what doesn't
• exercise!
  • one of the things that frustrates me about weight loss accounts is the ENTIRE focus is on weight loss and that means it's just about calories and a lot of the time there isn't a mention on exercise, i've never been an active person even from when i was a child and then i decided one day to go for a run and something just clicked? i kept running and like oh my god the mental clarity it gave me!
  • the benefits of exercise tend to boil down to what it can do to your weight but my weight hasn't really shifted but i feel a gazillion times better when i am consistently moving my body in a way that is fun for me
• my weight and what i eat do not affect my moral compass
  • understanding that whatever diet i've done and whatever i put into my body and whatever shape my body is does not affect who i am as a person is huge to me. in life your body will change because of literally everything and anything, and that does not mean you're a better or worse person because of it
  • when i used to binge i felt so shameful and guilty and sad and now if i slip up and binge i just look after myself, i deserve to heal and just because i ate 3 meals does not make me a bad person and does not change me inside

sorry for the long post, i know how hard it is to be all consumed by these dieting programs and to know that your weight can affect so much - i hope this post is even a little bit insightful?

This is a brilliant post with lots of great tips, that i'm sure will help many!

 

[Damocles]

I follow slimming world, and doing so I have lost 13st.

I have thought about stepping aside from it, but I honestly dont know what to do about it.

For the last 3 years, all I have done is follow sw to the letter. I've taken my own burgers to BBQs, my own packed lunch to parties... I'm not gonna say that sw has given me a bad relationship with food because anyone that was almost 28st and eating food out of the bleeping bin isnt on the best of terms with food to begin with.

Time and again we see people lose weight with sw, then stop and before you know it...theyre a
butter mountain again.
I've had 3 "off plan meals" (a term I bleeping loathe) in the last 3 years.. for the most part I've enjoyed it, I love cooking from scratch but being as honest as I can be, I am petrified of stopping and not knowing what to do going forward. I was sat in group last night and for the first time I said to myself, "why am I here, I dont need to be here anymore"

advice is welcomed

 

[ATV2021]

I developed BDD after slimming world and have struggled with disordered eating since I did it in 2012. I'm getting better and signed up for a nutrition course at my local gym which looks at improving the relationship with food. The CBT I had for the BDD was USELESS as I don't think the therapists knew what it actually meant and their attempt to change my mindset was basically to make me force eat foods I do not like. I definitely don't like them now .

I do now exercise regularly - can't say it's changed my weight but I definitely feel better for doing so. I'm hoping to get out of the "good and bad" food thoughts and just realising that no food is good or bad. Its just food. Some has a higher calorie content but its not bad.

 

[JustWonderingIf]

I follow slimming world, and doing so I have lost 13st.

I have thought about stepping aside from it, but I honestly dont know what to do about it.

For the last 3 years, all I have done is follow sw to the letter. I've taken my own burgers to BBQs, my own packed lunch to parties... I'm not gonna say that sw has given me a bad relationship with food because anyone that was almost 28st and eating food out of the bleeping bin isnt on the best of terms with food to begin with.

Time and again we see people lose weight with sw, then stop and before you know it...theyre a
butter mountain again.
I've had 3 "off plan meals" (a term I bleeping loathe) in the last 3 years.. for the most part I've enjoyed it, I love cooking from scratch but being as honest as I can be, I am petrified of stopping and not knowing what to do going forward. I was sat in group last night and for the first time I said to myself, "why am I here, I dont need to be here anymore"

advice is welcomed

What were your eating habits like before SW? Did you emotionally eat or binge eat?
What petrifies you about stopping? Accidently over eating or just not having the restrictions in place that syns give?