JAR21
VIP Member
I did go away and I'm going away again towards the end of June for a couple of weeks xThank you, Jar!
Last I remember you were on a holiday or about to leave for one? Hope that went well!
- Notice
Doodlebug005
VIP Member
Very common- we lost our 15 year old one eyed shihtzu last year- my shadow🥹-
hubby has 2 big dogs that hang out with him in his workshop and I love them, I do but I don’t love them like I did my little munchkin- people keep showing me little dogs in rescues- I know there is room for a little dog to potter after me- fill the void but I just can’t commit- The right thing to do is get an animal out of a rescue, I know that but it would feel like replacing her- we have had many animals over the years but the loss of this one hurt a lot- 12 years was a long time to have your Zippy- You will never forget of course- and Inky is a different species so you can convince yourself that “technically” you didn’t replace Zippy- ( irreplaceable) but you have some left over love to pass on to Inky
DanDanTheIceCreamMan
VIP Member
Hopefully you won't be in too long @Miscanthus and treatment doesn't get delayed by much xx
DanDanTheIceCreamMan
VIP Member
How's everybody doing?
The sun has finally come out here and the garden has gone into full bloom all at once (about bloody time!)
The sun has finally come out here and the garden has gone into full bloom all at once (about bloody time!)
JAR21
VIP Member
Pretty earrings! xHope you're doing better, @Miscanthusmy favourite lab tech usually gets the brunt of them nowadays
That's a beautiful bloom, @DanDanTheIceCreamMan!
I'd thrown in a few Lupin seeds a few times, nothing ever came of it. Although something ridiculous happened this year. As I've complained before, we've been going through a massive heatwave (40C+ day temperatures), crossed 50C in the national capital. People and plants dying. So I was quite pleased that my gomphrena that I'd sown a few months earlier were growing - they're pretty and quite sought after by artists as inclusions so I figured maybe a bit of commercial success? I'd made some cute earrings with flowers I'd bought from a craft supplier, was excited to use my own. Anyway, this was my first time growing gomphrena, but I could tell something was off. When the first bud bloomed, I realised that it was a zinnia. Which I'd last sown I think three or four years ago, and had never sprouted. It's a bit eaten up, but it's nodding its head around
Lots of mites, aphids, little orange-y bugs and lots more pests. I hate mealy mouth the most though. Every day twice a day I have to wash certain very spiky plants and scrub the leaves and get rid of the bloody creatures one by one by hand. And they're so icky!!! I'm very squeamishCan't apply any sort of repellant because it's too hot and the plants will burn. So physical removal it is
Physical health is bleh - heatstroke and almost-pneumonia at the same time, mum's usual stuff, caught dad in some lies so I'm dealing with that (financial stuff, not anything else), super-hectic at work, haven't crafted in months so withdrawal symptoms, TV and air conditioner and other gadgets keep dying or aren't working at their best so the cost plus the boredom. And the dog bit me again.
But we have ice and cold drinking water, I can afford to buy non-alcoholic beer (the malt saves my kidneys from giving up), I'm actually contributing at work and learning stuff, weather might start improving soon, the cricket world cup is beginning this weekend, and my material manufacturer told me that we're in the correct weather for crafting so I just need to be a little less exhausted. And I love my seedlings and the ginger lily is sprouting and the Pup likes me sometimes.
So lots of silver linings.
I'm also planning to buy some fun makeup for exhibitions to push myself for some self-care
I can definitely complain
Anyway, here are my gomphrena earrings. Not a very good photo, but it will do. Tried doing a photo with the flowers but it really confused the camera
View attachment 2963704
ETA: I'd read that mealy mouth etc are attracted to lush green gardens, so I left my dried out Fenugreek plants in the containers - not much is growing anyway in this heat. Seems to have worked. Mealy mouth and others are a daily nuisance, but not as bad as previous years even though conditions are ideal for them right now. Worth a try, maybe, to leave some dried grass in?
Doodlebug005
VIP Member
Good idea! Report us all!! It was quite bad last time- her own house must have been full of smoke too- hopefully she won’t do it again- am sure by the time hubby is up & about he will forget to say it to her- he is not the confrontational type anyway. I was thinking of printing off the blurb about the burning fine and sticking it in her letterbox but again she only has a house either side-
Zippy2000
VIP Member
Yup and they are sharp lol am already covered in scratchesAbsolutely gorgeous! And look at those claws!
Doodlebug005
VIP Member
Hope all well @Miscanthus 
JAR21
VIP Member
Sorry you're having to put up with such a self absorbed person. How old is she?
wisebutwild
VIP Member
Hope you’re feeling OK @Zippy2000. I posted on the H&M thread yesterday about you having to give up Inky and how sorry I was for you and then I kept waking up during the night thinking about you. As you know I am a fellow IBS sufferer and stress can make it a whole lot worse so I hope you are coping with all that is happening in your life at the moment. Take care of yourself and try to chill out as much as possible ….. oh and stick to the Fodmap diet ridgedly ….. boring I know but it does help.
Doodlebug005
VIP Member
You are so interesting! I will be googling “ havans” later! They won’t accuse me of racism - one of my family is married to a girl whose grandparents were from India- their kids are often here after school & overnight- My hubby has a huge industrial fan in his workshop- I can’t imagine him pushing it up the path to send the smoke over the fence
Hopefully it won’t come to that
Doodlebug005
VIP Member
I did think about it but really there is no one living near that a fire would bother- only us either side- anyone passing by wouldn’t be near enough to know what the smoke could be - ( smokey bbq etc) I think she would figure out one of us made the complaint.
JAR21
VIP Member
I don't know what I'd do. Like you said, if you report them, then it will be obvious who's done it. All you can do is speak to them and they will probably ask what the hell it's got to do with you!
Doodlebug005
VIP Member
Lol we have plenty of rain in Ireland lovely @ChaoticArtist
- I can’t complain about them- we live in the countryside- 3 houses all in a row- the middle house are burning rubbish- if I complain then it is obviously going to be me or our other neighbour🫣 ….
ChaoticArtist
VIP Member
Thank you, Jar!
Last I remember you were on a holiday or about to leave for one? Hope that went well!
ChaoticArtist
VIP Member
Lol we have plenty of rain in Ireland lovely @ChaoticArtist
Yeah no I meant a drizzle to fizzle out the fire right now. Can't accidentally water their yard either, I guess.
About the complaints, thought one option was to do a general (anonymous) report and get everyone investigated, so it wouldn't be a "you reported us" thing?
Q
Doodlebug005
VIP Member
Ya it is tricky- i felt for our elderly neighbour she had 2 lines of sheets/ duvet covers drying when the last fire was lit- not fair- Will see how things go- Hubby who is unwell atm says when he sees her he will let her know there is a €5,000 fine for burning rubbish🫣 - You may see a post in the future saying that I am moving
ChaoticArtist
VIP Member
That's quite troublesome. Wish you could have someone who could do something about it (an official of some sort) over for tea when they're burning stuff so they could take suo moto notice.
Inconsiderate neighbours are the worst nightmare. One would rather have ghosts
I suppose I could only suggest lighting some beeswax/soy wax candles - they really help mitigate the effects of pollutants at least inside the house. We were surrounded by neighbours who were chainsmokers, and most families here still perform havans (prayers with sacred bonfires) every day, plus people smoke 24×7 at the bus stop the city has built right below my window. The candles help a lot. Maybe large portable fans outside to keep the smoke away from your yard? If they complain, you can say it's for "this weird stench"/bugs.
ChaoticArtist
VIP Member
Apologies, @Zippy2000, I'd typed out a reply to you a couple of times, but neither felt really right, especially since you'd had the allergic reaction.
I'm still debating posting this in case it just randomly brings up your pain. Maybe I'll put it in a spoiler and you can read it when you need to?
Nothing major going on nowadays, except for mum narc-ing as usual and dealing with the fallout of everything that has been happening, on top of being sick and things being hectic at work while we enter a heatwave (can't tolerate these). Got one of my taxation forms from office today and it just made me so angry because I wouldn't have had to pay any tax this year (salary was well within limit) if not for my bloody relatives who are still enjoying investments in my name (no way to remove them unless I go the legal route, which mum agrees to then backs out). Makes me angrier because thanks to them my income goes up into a might higher tax bracket so the tax I have to pay is also much higher than I'd have had to, even if my salary had been high enough to be taxed.
I'd saved up these last couple of months so I could spend a bit on equipment for the new medium I'm working with. Have had a couple of carts ready to go for the last almost two months, but I'm so hesitant to checkout. A few good designs went out of stock while I was waiting and I could have used this time for crafting (missed Mother's Day sales and am all itchy from not crafting), but I've got this massive mental block that it's a huge amount, I've not earned much from my art anyway, we could use the money for something else (many things around the house/for parents) etc.
Mum says I should start being selfish, it's my earnings etc, but at the same time she not-so-subtly guilts me for spending money/not amping up her savings (which she is still pretending that she doesn't have). If I put the money in my savings, I know she'll find a way to take it from me, so I might as well invest it in my hobby. Or I could buy a new (budget) smartphone since both of mine are old and don't work that well, but they work enough. I'm hoping to hold off on that until my taxes are done (in July).
I'm just very up in my head, and I guess I need someone to tell me to pull the trigger if only I had a guarantee that I would sell something! Even an astrology-based prediction
The guilt is I guess normal. You'd probably feel the same way about a human being you've loved.
I have a different approach, because I'm used to most people I love and care about leaving me. Whether they actually ever cared about me or were just faking it to get whatever they wanted (that has been true in most cases). But then I've always had someone new come in their place, even if they later leave If I let myself feel guilty about loving the next person, I'd just be robbing myself, because even if it's for a day or year, they're making me feel good too.
With the dogs I know that their love was genuine, and I haven't truly felt them be gone. They're definitely a part of me still, in how I behave and love. And I feel them like a comforting, protective presence. They send me signs when I need them.
Any guilt I feel just stems from not doing more. Not being more present (school and stuff got in the way), scolding them for something or the other (mischievous lot, all of mine), not giving them more (material comforts, though I've always gone above and beyond budget etc).
And the only negativity around getting a new dog was the same as being around a new human - trying to close off my heart a bit so it wouldn't hurt so bad this time. Of course that's a stupid thought where animals/birds are concerned because they're here for such a short time and they love with their whole hearts so deserve that back too. And they'll take it from you whether you want to or not
One thing is 100% sure. That our animals/birds would want us to always love and be loved wholeheartedly. Even if they were jealous and possessive AHs when they were with us I don't think my first would have sent us the next one otherwise. Or the one they sent to us after that. Or the Pup. God knows what someone else might have done to him, but we're what he needs and he is what we needed, even if it results in some blood being drawn every other day!
It is also 100% okay to let go if you realise that a pairing is not a good fit. Our dogs literally chose us. The second one didn't and he was very angry about being sent to us (his owner basically lied and kicked him out too young), so it took us all a lot of time and patience to become a family. Maybe if we hadn't been grieving the first guy and so desperate for another, we couldn't have done it. Same with the Pup. Love at first sight but almost every day is a challenge sometimes. Difference is that we are three people, so there's always someone to take care of him or a specific need of his when others can't. And I also got a job just in time otherwise we would have had to give him up. I honestly didn't even want to bring a pup home because I was severely depressed and knew I couldn't take care of one, and I knew my parents wouldn't. They do a few things, but there are so many things that I have to pick up the slack on.
So it's okay either way. Have a pet, don't have a pet, rehome a pet because you can't care for them the way you would like to/they need, that's actually pretty selfless. If anyone gives you shite for it, they're the crappy ones.
And also, allergies can develop suddenly due to illnesses or stress or reactions to vaccines etc (mum's Caeliac developed as an adult that's why it couldn't be diagnosed for more than a decade - docs here were used to it being a paediatric disease), you had no way of knowing before you got Inky.
I have a different approach, because I'm used to most people I love and care about leaving me. Whether they actually ever cared about me or were just faking it to get whatever they wanted (that has been true in most cases). But then I've always had someone new come in their place, even if they later leave
If I let myself feel guilty about loving the next person, I'd just be robbing myself, because even if it's for a day or year, they're making me feel good too.With the dogs I know that their love was genuine, and I haven't truly felt them be gone. They're definitely a part of me still, in how I behave and love. And I feel them like a comforting, protective presence. They send me signs when I need them.
Any guilt I feel just stems from not doing more. Not being more present (school and stuff got in the way), scolding them for something or the other (mischievous lot, all of mine), not giving them more (material comforts, though I've always gone above and beyond budget etc).
And the only negativity around getting a new dog was the same as being around a new human - trying to close off my heart a bit so it wouldn't hurt so bad this time. Of course that's a stupid thought where animals/birds are concerned because they're here for such a short time and they love with their whole hearts so deserve that back too. And they'll take it from you whether you want to or not
One thing is 100% sure. That our animals/birds would want us to always love and be loved wholeheartedly. Even if they were jealous and possessive AHs when they were with us
I don't think my first would have sent us the next one otherwise. Or the one they sent to us after that. Or the Pup. God knows what someone else might have done to him, but we're what he needs and he is what we needed, even if it results in some blood being drawn every other day!It is also 100% okay to let go if you realise that a pairing is not a good fit. Our dogs literally chose us. The second one didn't and he was very angry about being sent to us (his owner basically lied and kicked him out too young), so it took us all a lot of time and patience to become a family. Maybe if we hadn't been grieving the first guy and so desperate for another, we couldn't have done it. Same with the Pup. Love at first sight but almost every day is a challenge sometimes. Difference is that we are three people, so there's always someone to take care of him or a specific need of his when others can't. And I also got a job just in time otherwise we would have had to give him up. I honestly didn't even want to bring a pup home because I was severely depressed and knew I couldn't take care of one, and I knew my parents wouldn't. They do a few things, but there are so many things that I have to pick up the slack on.
So it's okay either way. Have a pet, don't have a pet, rehome a pet because you can't care for them the way you would like to/they need, that's actually pretty selfless. If anyone gives you shite for it, they're the crappy ones.
And also, allergies can develop suddenly due to illnesses or stress or reactions to vaccines etc (mum's Caeliac developed as an adult that's why it couldn't be diagnosed for more than a decade - docs here were used to it being a paediatric disease), you had no way of knowing before you got Inky.
I'm still debating posting this in case it just randomly brings up your pain. Maybe I'll put it in a spoiler and you can read it when you need to?
Nothing major going on nowadays, except for mum narc-ing as usual and dealing with the fallout of everything that has been happening, on top of being sick and things being hectic at work while we enter a heatwave (can't tolerate these). Got one of my taxation forms from office today and it just made me so angry because I wouldn't have had to pay any tax this year (salary was well within limit) if not for my bloody relatives who are still enjoying investments in my name (no way to remove them unless I go the legal route, which mum agrees to then backs out). Makes me angrier because thanks to them my income goes up into a might higher tax bracket so the tax I have to pay is also much higher than I'd have had to, even if my salary had been high enough to be taxed.
I'd saved up these last couple of months so I could spend a bit on equipment for the new medium I'm working with. Have had a couple of carts ready to go for the last almost two months, but I'm so hesitant to checkout. A few good designs went out of stock while I was waiting and I could have used this time for crafting (missed Mother's Day sales and am all itchy from not crafting), but I've got this massive mental block that it's a huge amount, I've not earned much from my art anyway, we could use the money for something else (many things around the house/for parents) etc.
Mum says I should start being selfish, it's my earnings etc, but at the same time she not-so-subtly guilts me for spending money/not amping up her savings (which she is still pretending that she doesn't have). If I put the money in my savings, I know she'll find a way to take it from me, so I might as well invest it in my hobby. Or I could buy a new (budget) smartphone since both of mine are old and don't work that well, but they work enough. I'm hoping to hold off on that until my taxes are done (in July).
I'm just very up in my head, and I guess I need someone to tell me to pull the trigger
if only I had a guarantee that I would sell something! Even an astrology-based prediction