Elle Darby #3 Greasy Con-Artist loves Elles cash, size up Angelll we can see your.....

[Fearne]

I've watched the video, when she starts reading the message in the card it does sound like their Mum has written it and there is some lovely words in there, although, they do rhyme and its too much like it has been taken from a poem or reading, but, as Elle carrys on reading and mentions lockdown and how their mum would get Elle to take her to the garden centre it sounds as if Elle has written it.

Even though their mum wasn't well towards the end she would have known what was to come and I wouldn't be surprised if she had written a card but the mentions of lockdown makes me doubt that.

If Elle has written the card she'll never admit this.

 

[ChubClubThug]

Her mum may have known that she wouldn't be present for Katie's next bday..I have read about parents with terminal illnesses leaving their children cards and a diary for each year that they grow. If Elle has planned the whole thing with the gift etc, I think she's honestly lost the plot. Her heart probably had good intentions but the way she did it was a bit of a clencher moment for me. She could have just said to Katie, even when mum was really poorly she thought ahead and thought of you as you were her special girl. Katie would have understood that rather than be treated like a 3yr old. Grief is such a personal thing so I hope what she has done has come from a good place. As I said earlier I think she's struggling and just ignoring it all and trying to be the strong brave one. Dear me, what a mess.

 

[HonestUnicorn]

To be fair it doesn’t even matter who wrote it. but It should have never ever made it to bloody Youtube!

Fair enough she wanted to record it for the future, but that did not need to be shared with the internet. Keep that private and tell the ‘vlog’ that she got an emotional card thats it.

It’s so cruel to poor Katie, do not know what she was thinking...

 

[Loulou_23]

To be fair it doesn’t even matter who wrote it. but It should have never ever made it to bloody Youtube!

Fair enough she wanted to record it for the future, but that did not need to be shared with the internet. Keep that private and tell the ‘vlog’ that she got an emotional card thats it.

It’s so cruel to poor Katie, do not know what she was thinking...

Completely agree, I don’t think anyone thinks Elle’s heart wasn’t in the right place she obviously thinks it’s a nice thing she’s done. Personally I’ve always thought Elle was patronising and fake so have never brought her fake nice act. However the way she went about it by posting it for views and using her sister was wrong don’t care what anyone says.

 

[Nellyellie]

Regardless who wrote the card- Elle or her mum that is a private moment, of a vulnerable girl that should not have been recorded and shared for the world to see!

Some honesty even if it was her mum- ‘Mum wanted you to have something special so arranged this before she died’.

I lost my dad last year, I’m in my early 30’s so I know how much it hurts to lose a parent prematurely, a video like this would not have helped me through my grieving process.

As for Con and the hair, he turns my stomach, absolute head

 

[ChubClubThug]

I wonder what the family think of her doing this. Surely they can't agree with everything she does.

 

[idk2]

I wish I had read this thread before watching the video. I suspected what was about to happen when Elle put on that *voice* and handed the bag over. I did think it shouldn't have been filmed at all. I cry watching other people cry, I won't even know them and I'll start crying too so I was a mess watching it. I really hope Elle's mum had told her to organise something for Katie's birthday to be from her esp as she most likely wouldn't have had the strength to do so herself towards the end. Elle mentioned they knew she only had weeks to live so I can imagine how many difficult conversations were needed. Even so, that should not have been filmed or put on the internet for thousands to see.

 

[Socks221]

Also it did make Katie feel special, but if Elle did write it, it’s unobtainable and unfair. If Elle was lucky enough to be able to get pregnant and for instance was in hospital with the baby over Kate’s future birthday and unable to get a card and present how would she be made to feel on that particular birthday etc? I just don’t think this behaviour helps her in the long run all it does is rack up views and bank balance

She is a young girl who’s lost her mum I think she’s just trying to do what feels right by her sister, there isn’t any rules to it. I am 33 and I wouldn’t know what’s right in that situation however I would understand mine and my sisters relationship and how we personally deal with things. I don’t know to much about the disability Katie has but she has a job and what seems like a fairly independent life which would lead me to believe she would understand life/death how it work etc so I personally took the video as if she was kind of being sarcastic (in a nice way ) about it coming from an angel.

 

[Fairypop]

To be fair it doesn’t even matter who wrote it. but It should have never ever made it to bloody Youtube!

Fair enough she wanted to record it for the future, but that did not need to be shared with the internet. Keep that private and tell the ‘vlog’ that she got an emotional card thats it.

It’s so cruel to poor Katie, do not know what she was thinking...

Absolutely. I think the idea (on the whole) is lovely & it might be something they might like to look back on in the future - but like you said, it doesn’t mean everyone needs to see it. I can’t help but think that Katie goes along with pretty much everything Elle says, so even if she does “consent” to these videos, I do think she’s heavily, heavily influenced by Elle.

 

[Secretadmirer]

Nah sorry I can’t be ok with what she’s done. Filming her grieving sister in a really personal moment and making a video, uploading it online because she knows it will pull on heart strings/get the views so she can make money out of it. Nope

 

[Loulou_23]

She’s had 74k views on it only went up 5 hours ago too! I’m sorry but she knew exactly what she was doing here!

 

[HinchythetwattyGrinchy]

I get she is grieving whatever, there is no correct amount of time for grief. Some people get over death quicker than others however I don’t know what I think about that video. My grandad passed away 4 weeks before my 21st, he knew he wouldn’t see my birthday and as much as he’d have LOVED to have wrote a letter, he just didn’t have the time / energy. Instead, he just gave me all of my deceased Nana’s jewellery in an envelope with my name on and I’d have never, ever shared my reaction with anyone / for the world to see. I think some things like this are for shock factor / rake the views in, but who knows? I do think Katie is such a sweet girl and it really wasn’t fair of Elle to do that to her.

 

[Gee_whip]

I’m not sure if Katie would believe that her mum left it just because she has a learning disability...I know everyone is different, but she seems to have a good level of understanding to me. My uncle was starved of oxygen at birth and has a learning disability, but he’s bright as anything.

I know what you mean. But whether she believes it was literally her mum or her mums ghost/angel I think its wrong, because we simply don’t know how much Katie understands. And exploiting that and treating her like a child for views is poor taste. Elle wouldn’t make that type of video with a mainstream young person, so why do it to Katie? I think Elle’s lost the plot in terms of her content

 

[Hugo123]

I’m sure Ellie’s said at one point her mum didn’t want to know anything about her illness so didn’t know how bad it was so I’d only assume that because she got so poorly quickly she wouldn’t have been able to write a card

 

[Nellyellie]

I get that sometimes signs of a loved one can help. I find white feathers all the time at home- I have a feather duvet and my cushions in my sofa are all feathers, but I tell myself every time it’s my dad visiting me.... however, I’m not 22, with a learning disability, being filmed and it posted online.

Even if I try to justify it by thinking Katie might find it quite cathartic and doesn’t genuinely believe it was her mum as an angel dropped it off at the door step but that it helps her to think her mum has visited- it should never have been filmed. Keep it private!!

 

[idk2]

I’m sure Ellie’s said at one point her mum didn’t want to know anything about her illness so didn’t know how bad it was so I’d only assume that because she got so poorly quickly she wouldn’t have been able to write a card

No, she said Katie didn't know the full extent. They all knew except Katie and hid it until they couldn't anymore

 

[Lucycarmella]

No, she said Katie didn't know the full extent. They all knew except Katie and hid it until they couldn't anymore

I know they did hide it from Katie but Ellie did say in a video that her mum didn’t want to know anything about the illness and wouldn’t even go to any of the scans Ect ..Ellie would go in with her mums previous partner . And she said they all respected her wishes about her not wanting to know anything about it ..

 

[uMmMmM]

I’ve never commented on one of these threads before, more just read from a distance, but I lost my dad in December to cancer (multiple brain tumours) so I’ve followed Elles journey as I feel it’s something I can really relate too, however, something really didn’t sit right with me watching Katie being exposed like that, the emotions of grief are so complex, and raw, for anybody, let alone someone who already has specific needs like Katie does, some things should just be left off camera.

 

[clairecfm]

I left a comment under the video saying I felt it was exploiting Katie as a vulnerable adult. (It was deleted immediately) I similarly feel Lucy’s video was exploitation. The issue is whether Katie has actual capacity to consent to being in these videos which are published to the general public. Given that is unable to live/work independently or without supervision it would be seriously questionable as to whether she holds such capacity. In which case Elle has exploited her privacy and used her vulnerability. Given that she makes profit from her YouTube channel and as well as from her fanbase - this can only be viewed as another video to attract views/likes/subscribers for her own personal gain which is likely both legally and morally wrong. At the very basic level this is a moment which should be kept private to protect the dignity and vulnerability of Katie.

 

[Gee_whip]

I left a comment under the video saying I felt it was exploiting Katie as a vulnerable adult. (It was deleted immediately) I similarly feel Lucy’s video was exploitation. The issue is whether Katie has actual capacity to consent to being in these videos which are published to the general public. Given that is unable to live/work independently or without supervision it would be seriously questionable as to whether she holds such capacity. In which case Elle has exploited her privacy and used her vulnerability. Given that she makes profit from her YouTube channel and as well as from her fanbase - this can only be viewed as another video to attract views/likes/subscribers for her own personal gain which is likely both legally and morally wrong. At the very basic level this is a moment which should be kept private to protect the dignity and vulnerability of Katie.

exactly what I was thinking. How do we measure consent for a young person with additional needs? Does Katie grasp consent or understand it the way a mainstream person would? I don’t think we can say with full confidence that she does. Therefore involving her and particularly making this recent video with the birthday card gimmick doesn’t sit right with me. If she didn’t cry enough was Elle going to scrap the video? Just weird