Does anyone hate their job? #3

[MrsDoodles]

Hi all,

Is anybody on here a solicitor or had a career change? I’ve been a family solicitor for 5 years and i really hate it. I changed firms recently as i thought maybe it was the employer i didn’t like but i now realise it’s the job. I like helping people but my personality avoids conflict (a bit of a contradiction i know!), my job is so stressful and most days i have bad anxiety. Weekends are spent in turmoil at the thought of the week ahead!

My husband and i want to start a family but the thought of being pregnant whilst doing this job is already unbearable and i know i’d be signed off on sick due to stress. I would also dread returning to work after maternity leave.

I’ve never been in this position before and looking for jobs is a minefield. I could potentially cross qualify in to another area of law but don’t want to have to take a big pay cut. I have been applying for jobs in HR because i have a lot of transferrable skills and think this would be a better fit to my personality and i would enjoy it. I was wondering if anybody works in HR and has any advice or thoughts on whether this type of transition is an option or whether i would need further qualifications such as CIPD to stand a chance. I had looked at Civil Service but, to be honest, i struggle to decipher what the role actually entails from the job description and whether it would be a good fit for me, also heard the application process is difficult.

I am at a loss with what career direction to take but I know i can’t stay much longer in my current role. Any help would be really appreciated

 

[saltandvinegarcrisps]

Hi all,

Is anybody on here a solicitor or had a career change? I’ve been a family solicitor for 5 years and i really hate it. I changed firms recently as i thought maybe it was the employer i didn’t like but i now realise it’s the job. I like helping people but my personality avoids conflict (a bit of a contradiction i know!), my job is so stressful and most days i have bad anxiety. Weekends are spent in turmoil at the thought of the week ahead!

My husband and i want to start a family but the thought of being pregnant whilst doing this job is already unbearable and i know i’d be signed off on sick due to stress. I would also dread returning to work after maternity leave.

I’ve never been in this position before and looking for jobs is a minefield. I could potentially cross qualify in to another area of law but don’t want to have to take a big pay cut. I have been applying for jobs in HR because i have a lot of transferrable skills and think this would be a better fit to my personality and i would enjoy it. I was wondering if anybody works in HR and has any advice or thoughts on whether this type of transition is an option or whether i would need further qualifications such as CIPD to stand a chance. I had looked at Civil Service but, to be honest, i struggle to decipher what the role actually entails from the job description and whether it would be a good fit for me, also heard the application process is difficult.

I am at a loss with what career direction to take but I know i can’t stay much longer in my current role. Any help would be really appreciated

What about a contracts role in some sort of industry? Reviewing client contracts, assessing risk and liability.

 

[MrsDoodles]

Thank you for replying, i’ll definitely have a look, it sounds like something i’d enjoy doing!

 

[Libertine1975]

Hi all,

Is anybody on here a solicitor or had a career change? I’ve been a family solicitor for 5 years and i really hate it. I changed firms recently as i thought maybe it was the employer i didn’t like but i now realise it’s the job. I like helping people but my personality avoids conflict (a bit of a contradiction i know!), my job is so stressful and most days i have bad anxiety. Weekends are spent in turmoil at the thought of the week ahead!

My husband and i want to start a family but the thought of being pregnant whilst doing this job is already unbearable and i know i’d be signed off on sick due to stress. I would also dread returning to work after maternity leave.

I’ve never been in this position before and looking for jobs is a minefield. I could potentially cross qualify in to another area of law but don’t want to have to take a big pay cut. I have been applying for jobs in HR because i have a lot of transferrable skills and think this would be a better fit to my personality and i would enjoy it. I was wondering if anybody works in HR and has any advice or thoughts on whether this type of transition is an option or whether i would need further qualifications such as CIPD to stand a chance. I had looked at Civil Service but, to be honest, i struggle to decipher what the role actually entails from the job description and whether it would be a good fit for me, also heard the application process is difficult.

I am at a loss with what career direction to take but I know i can’t stay much longer in my current role. Any help would be really appreciated

I'm the same. Private Client lawyer, there is a shortage of us and there is so much work. Clients don't understand the pressures we are under with the awful public bodies we have to deal with and don't understand why things take as long as they do. It's so frustrating.

I want to do something else but can't take a massive pay cut as I'm single with no other income.

 

[tomato_paste]

I'm the same. Private Client lawyer, there is a shortage of us and there is so much work. Clients don't understand the pressures we are under with the awful public bodies we have to deal with and don't understand why things take as long as they do. It's so frustrating.

I want to do something else but can't take a massive pay cut as I'm single with no other income.

The "golden cage" of these types of situations I know all too well. I'm in tech so I earn a really good wage; have wanted to do something else for years now but I can't afford my mortgage otherwise - single too, and no other income either. Only got worse with the CoL crisis too. Everything that appeals to me is either paid really tit or would need loads of experience to earn well.
I've decided to pivot into a related field (Cyber Security) that still contains some of the stuff I still like about tech (the challenges and puzzles) but also has something that I'm super interested in (psychology and behaviour). I've started a Master's degree online. Might take me a few years to get there and it's expensive AF but the longer I wait the harder it's gonna get.

Maybe that's an option for you too? What do you enjoy about your field? Can you find something that still contains that, but allows some distance from the tit parts maybe?

 

[Codiaeum]

The "golden cage" of these types of situations I know all too well. I'm in tech so I earn a really good wage; have wanted to do something else for years now but I can't afford my mortgage otherwise - single too, and no other income either. Only got worse with the CoL crisis too. Everything that appeals to me is either paid really tit or would need loads of experience to earn well.
I've decided to pivot into a related field (Cyber Security) that still contains some of the stuff I still like about tech (the challenges and puzzles) but also has something that I'm super interested in (psychology and behaviour). I've started a Master's degree online. Might take me a few years to get there and it's expensive AF but the longer I wait the harder it's gonna get.

I relate so much to the golden cage that is Tech. I enjoy the puzzles, the weirdness of some of the projects, the funny findings and the feeling you get when you have truly made something new and it helps people. But there are a lot of aspects I don't enjoy so much, but they pay is too good. The longer you work in that industry, the harder it seems to get out of it.

 

[WeepingCassandra]

So desperate to not return to the NHS post maternity leave I'm considering PIP assessor roles.

Pros - same pay as my old hours, but on my new ones (I'm dropping from 4 days to 3), work from home so no commute or parking issues, maybe I could be a positive change, keeps my registration and skills going
Cons - very unstable, would be soul destroying, hate the idea of selling myself out to PIP, literally no-one has anything nice to say about it either from an assessor or an assessed person point of view.

 

[MrsDoodles]

I'm the same. Private Client lawyer, there is a shortage of us and there is so much work. Clients don't understand the pressures we are under with the awful public bodies we have to deal with and don't understand why things take as long as they do. It's so frustrating.

I want to do something else but can't take a massive pay cut as I'm single with no other income.

It’s a really tit situation isn’t it, completely understand the pressure private client solicitors are under too! I wish someone had told me the truth about being a solicitor before i qualified. I am constantly looking at jobs but nobody seems to be considering me I’m thinking of registering with a recruitment agency to see if they can find me something!

 

[ThisIsMyDragName]

So desperate to not return to the NHS post maternity leave I'm considering PIP assessor roles.

Pros - same pay as my old hours, but on my new ones (I'm dropping from 4 days to 3), work from home so no commute or parking issues, maybe I could be a positive change, keeps my registration and skills going
Cons - very unstable, would be soul destroying, hate the idea of selling myself out to PIP, literally no-one has anything nice to say about it either from an assessor or an assessed person point of view.

I’ve taken people to PIP assessments in the good old pre covid days where you had F2F appointments. A good PIP assessor was worth their weight in gold and then some. It’s a really anxiety ridden thing for the applicant. A good assessor makes them feel at ease and makes it easier for them to talk about their health and their ‘worst days’, and means they don’t feel so horribly deflated when they leave. My understanding is it then goes into the hands of a decision maker, and that’s the rubbish part!

 

[WeepingCassandra]

I’ve taken people to PIP assessments in the good old pre covid days where you had F2F appointments. A good PIP assessor was worth their weight in gold and then some. It’s a really anxiety ridden thing for the applicant. A good assessor makes them feel at ease and makes it easier for them to talk about their health and their ‘worst days’, and means they don’t feel so horribly deflated when they leave. My understanding is it then goes into the hands of a decision maker, and that’s the rubbish part!

I'm really good at talking to people and listening to their worries. I think that I would be good at coaxing the right information out of them (from what I'm reading online, a lot of the problem is that you need to say certain things to get the award and avoid saying others?) but I don't want to do a job that screws others over for the sake of targets and cost saving.

That being said, a lot of my anxiety about returning to work is to do with parking, the commute and the area I'm going into. Working from home eliminates all of that. But then it's all agency work, so you can be dropped at the slight of a hat if you're not meeting their targets and it sounds like there's too much work and not enough people. With a toddler and hoping to have a second baby in 2025 I don't know if I can afford to be in an unstable position. But if the pays good enough that I could save as hard as possible (...with a toddler, ha...) and fund my own maternity leave? I dunno.

I've spoken to a friend of a friend who did it and she said it was awful and soul destroying but good pay and good benefits in that it was WFH/setting her own hours (outside of appointments). She's very similar to me in character too. :/

 

[ThisIsMyDragName]

I'm really good at talking to people and listening to their worries. I think that I would be good at coaxing the right information out of them (from what I'm reading online, a lot of the problem is that you need to say certain things to get the award and avoid saying others?) but I don't want to do a job that screws others over for the sake of targets and cost saving.

That being said, a lot of my anxiety about returning to work is to do with parking, the commute and the area I'm going into. Working from home eliminates all of that. But then it's all agency work, so you can be dropped at the slight of a hat if you're not meeting their targets and it sounds like there's too much work and not enough people. With a toddler and hoping to have a second baby in 2025 I don't know if I can afford to be in an unstable position. But if the pays good enough that I could save as hard as possible (...with a toddler, ha...) and fund my own maternity leave? I dunno.

I've spoken to a friend of a friend who did it and she said it was awful and soul destroying but good pay and good benefits in that it was WFH/setting her own hours (outside of appointments). She's very similar to me in character too. :/

It’s just such a shame that it’s like this. It shouldn’t be at all. Not from the perspective of the applicants or the assessors. Urrrrg, life sucks.

 

[Stillwater]

Solidarity. New boss in a very happy functional team, ruined it. Wanna leave.

Can anyone tell me if this is an actual fact or a splitting of hairs please? I’d be grateful as I am perplexed>>

His Day 8, he told me I don’t have a 40 hour job so being shunted other stuff - fine I guess. Today, I quoted that back but said he had said I didn’t have a full time job - he corrected to 40 hour and said there was a difference? Is there?

And can someone just say you don’t have a 40 hour job? Or should that go through a process?

 

[tomato_paste]

Solidarity. New boss in a very happy functional team, ruined it. Wanna leave.

Can anyone tell me if this is an actual fact or a splitting of hairs please? I’d be grateful as I am perplexed>>

His Day 8, he told me I don’t have a 40 hour job so being shunted other stuff - fine I guess. Today, I quoted that back but said he had said I didn’t have a full time job - he corrected to 40 hour and said there was a difference? Is there?

And can someone just say you don’t have a 40 hour job? Or should that go through a process?

What hours are in your contract? He can't simply reduce your hours without a change of contract - if he's unwilling to schedule you, you should seek legal advice.

From the UK gov website:

> There is no specific number of hours that makes someone full or part-time, but a full-time worker will usually work 35 hours or more a week.

 

[Stillwater]

Thank you - in fact yes I am on 35 hours. I had a right day of it all yesterday- on the one hand told I don’t have a full time role meanwhile he’s allowing someone to totally tread on my toes with the activity I do have. Baffling.

i am going to do some tentative finding out re advice.

 

[50degreesnorth]

I left tech FT when I was asked to indicate in my booked holiday leave whether I was “only available by phone and email, or working as normal”. Nope to the nope.

It’s been 10 years now and I do a bit of freelance stuff and have had some fun with machine learning. Every couple of years I get the twitch and apply for tech jobs then realise that the stress isn’t worth the £££.

I was on the last thread - quit my job (PT tech) and just started my new salaried job on Monday. Something I’d never have aspired to (zero education required), but I’m absolutely loving it. Caveat - I lead a simple life and don’t need much money.

So the job I quit… I thought my attitude towards the job radiates from every pore - but at my exit chat, my manager said he’d hire me back anytime and just to say the word.

The word is “no”.

 

[LifeOfMog]

I left tech FT when I was asked to indicate in my booked holiday leave whether I was “only available by phone and email, or working as normal”. Nope to the nope.

It’s been 10 years now and I do a bit of freelance stuff and have had some fun with machine learning. Every couple of years I get the twitch and apply for tech jobs then realise that the stress isn’t worth the £££.

I was on the last thread - quit my job (PT tech) and just started my new salaried job on Monday. Something I’d never have aspired to (zero education required), but I’m absolutely loving it. Caveat - I lead a simple life and don’t need much money.

So the job I quit… I thought my attitude towards the job radiates from every pore - but at my exit chat, my manager said he’d hire me back anytime and just to say the word.

The word is “no”.

Do you have any recommendations / help for those looking to get into tech??

Been trying so hard for years, but I'm on a higher salary for my age and I kinda need it (house deposit, 4 legged son & a shopping addiction) so I'm finding it hard for companies to take on someone with no prior experience, and a £38k salary

 

[Codiaeum]

Do you have any recommendations / help for those looking to get into tech??

Been trying so hard for years, but I'm on a higher salary for my age and I kinda need it (house deposit, 4 legged son & a shopping addiction) so I'm finding it hard for companies to take on someone with no prior experience, and a £38k salary

It really depends what type of tech job you're after. There are a lot of jobs in the industry that aren't actually very techy, but that still pay well and often better than a similar job in a non-tech company (Program Manager, Ops Managers, Technical Writers, etc). If you are looking to get into software engineering, machine learning, data science, my recommendation is to make sure you absolutely are on top of your interviewing game: ensuring you can answer coding question or science-y questions during the interview, do live (leet)coding, all while talking the interviewer through your thought process. It doesn't need to be 100% perfect, the aim is to check how you work through a problem and what questions you ask to define the problem and for whom you're making the solution.
Also read up on company values and weave that into your answers. With tech, most of it during interviews is explaining relevant stories and walk through them in a systematic manner, regardless of what job you are applying to, you need to tell a coherent story.

Referrals, if you can get one, are also really important and seem to be getting more so. The sheer volume of applications is insane, doesn't even matter for which role.

 

[Norfolking Good]

I had a funny one today. My manager emailed me in a strop because I’d missed my appraisal meeting. Turns out she set it up as a meeting in Outlook and not Teams and didn’t invite me. Evidently my psychic powers are failing me haha

 

[keepyourpeace]

So my big boss is out this week (thank the lord) but my direct manager has had it in for me all week. Everything I've said has been shat upon. Shouts at me in the office. Ignores me when im asking work related questions. Pulls me up on the smallest bleeping things.

I just want an out and applying like mad but not getting anywhere and I'm too scared to go sick because I'm worried about future employers plus I know my current job will duck up my pay.

 

[WeepingCassandra]

It’s just such a shame that it’s like this. It shouldn’t be at all. Not from the perspective of the applicants or the assessors. Urrrrg, life sucks.

It is, isn't it.

I have acquired a parking permit now so about 75% of my stress and anxiety about returning to work has been relieved. I am really struggling with going back to a different role though, I feel so angry and bitter about losing my old job (I was working in a specialist team before pregnancy, I dropped one day and the team has decided that they can't support my new hours so I've been bumped to a team that I have no interest in and no experience in). I've been looking for other roles in the field that I loved and was passionate about but it's a very niche part of healthcare and without giving too much away, there is only my hospital and two charities in my county that have my previous job role. One isn't hiring any time soon (I worked very closely with the girl who has that job) and the other is hiring at the moment but turned me down after an absolutely awful interview a couple of months ago. Despite readvertising the post and contacting them again to try and convince them to give me another shot, they won't budge and now 5 years of experience and passion has gone up in flames.