The question was posed..."why don't these people just DM me and have a real conversation..." instead of posting here.
Well, to answer that question - because anyone who has a differing opinion or real insight to offer is banned and blocked. That makes having a conversation pretty difficult.
The most successful groups are run by admin who respect that a comment can be made that, whilst differing from their own beliefs, is still valid. Said admin then allow a healthy debate.
Any group leader who sets themselves up as above all criticism and stamps on any freedom of expression incites a sense of moral indignation. Close down the route by which they can talk it over with you, and they find other outlets.
The fact that this thread is ever growing, with more ex members joining, should be cause enough for a pause for thought. Clearly lots of ex members share the same experience.
Maybe unblock everyone, apologize for running what can appear to be a dictatorship and start over. People mostly just want to get along. Recognise the hurt you cause to others by throwing people away because they dare to have an opinion different to your own. Respect works both ways. Instead of victimising yourself, have a moment of self examination.
People feel angered and hurt by injustice to themselves and others. Think about that for a moment. If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, then it's not a chihuahua.
And the biggest take home message...
You can fool some of the people most of the time but not all of the people, all of the time.
Stick around long enough and people see a reality that you may not be comfortable with. If that's the case, stay of social media