I wouldn’t give him the chance to pop up. Why isn’t he unmatched or blocked?Morning ladies, it's a new week and the sun is shining this morningI hope we all have a better happier week
I've had 3 days of silence from Mr Saturday date and it possibly may continue. He may also pop up today with his excuses but we shall see. The saga rumbles on ...
Because on Badoo it doesn't work like that. The option there is to report and block, I can't report him for being a lying waste of space unfortunately. I can delete the conversation with him by putting him in the bin but that won't stop him messaging me. At this point I feel like I'm in control, I am intrigued to see if he reappears and what form his excuses will take. As far as I'm concerned he's in the bin but I'm also curious to see if he does message me.I wouldn’t give him the chance to pop up. Why isn’t he unmatched or blocked?
We’ve got to stop giving these men a way back in. So many times we say ‘I’m done’ and then update that we’ve replied to these idiots or that’s it’s still dragging on.
what excuses do you think he’ll come up with? i get the curiosity, but how will you react if he reappears with a detailed excuse? will you respond? i would love to know what he comes up with given how weird the phone number story was!Because on Badoo it doesn't work like that. The option there is to report and block, I can't report him for being a lying waste of space unfortunately. I can delete the conversation with him by putting him in the bin but that won't stop him messaging me. At this point I feel like I'm in control, I am intrigued to see if he reappears and what form his excuses will take. As far as I'm concerned he's in the bin but I'm also curious to see if he does message me.
have you met men?you can’t come back from arranging a date and then never mentioning it again imo.
Honestly I've no idea what he will say, if anything. He may never return to the app although his profile is still very much there. As always with these situations it's the vanishing act that leaves so many unanswered questions as to why. And he would have to be really really stupid if he thinks I'm going to give him another chance after his behaviour and complete indifference to my feelings. It's crossed my mind a few times, what if I had been really excited to see him Saturday and he did what he did, I'd be soo much more upset than I am. There is nothing I could say to him that would make any difference, I've learnt there is noo point sending a long heartfelt message as these kind of men just don't care. But I am interested to see what his excuse is ...my instinct is he will blame covid, that seems to be the go to these days.what excuses do you think he’ll come up with? i get the curiosity, but how will you react if he reappears with a detailed excuse? will you respond? i would love to know what he comes up with given how weird the phone number story was!
honestly, as said before, i would be surprised if he does because (in the nicest possible way) i think he’s slow faded. you can’t come back from arranging a date and then never mentioning it again imo.
You would think not but many a man has tried - lost my phone; my [insert family member] *died/was ill/got taken into hospital (*delete as appropriate); got called into work at short notice; had to look after my child; I fell asleep on Friday and slept through until Sunday.you can’t come back from arranging a date and then never mentioning it again imo.
I've never had the 'my phone broke' , I have however had the" I lost my phone, I left my phone at work / home and in the car! ' I think we can always give people the benefit of the doubt, I did it recently with Mr Saturday date who apparently lost his phone hence why he was awol all the first weekend of the week we started chatting, however that excuse plus all the other odd behaviour generally amounts to the same conclusion and that's a lying cheat. And my experience phone issues usually means there is a significant other in the picture who is the main reason for inconsistent contact.In mens defefence, I smashed my phone screen on Saturday so it was totally unusable until I got it fixed. The phone repair shop I like to use only work till 12 on a Saturday (and I was busy) then is shut on Monday so I couldn’t go till this Monday. I’ve got it repaired but the way I smashed it, it kept on thinking someone was typing so it’s locked me so I’m gonna have to do a hard reboot. BUT I can’t remember my Apple ID password so I’ve asked for a request but they take a couple of days to be sent, and it’ll be with me on Friday so I’m using an old phone and downloaded messenger to contact family and friends. But in terms of the men I’m talking too? They’re gonna have to wait until I can access my Apple ID password to download WhatsApp, bumble etc and use the back up option for some of them to bring back the chat.
If I was talking to a man and he came back some bull like that as excuse, I wouldn’t believe him!
but luckily, I don’t have my last seen on WhatsApp and don’t use Facebook profile (only messenger!) AND the old phone I’m using is with a PAYG sim and even if I switch sims, I don’t have anyones number saved
So give them the benefit of the doubt to begin with ?
I have another phone with a different number for a number of reasons like my current phone breaks etc. it’s came in handy when I got banned off tinder and wanted to go on it. The minute I no longer tinder, (and can use my current phone!), this phone is going back in the draw!Another thing. When I started all this I got a separate phone for the apps. I just thought it made sense especially back then when I was chatting (being blocked, ghosted, the reappearing ghosts etc) and didn't want all these messages on my friends/work phone. Cheap sim and it worked well. I know though that a second phone is deemed deeply suspicious by many but I was and am definitely single.
yeah phone in the car/home is a bit of a BS excuse but the work I kinda get because the office might not be open 24/7. I would be less critical of that excuse is I guess what I’m trying to say!I've never had the 'my phone broke' , I have however had the" I lost my phone, I left my phone at work / home and in the car! ' I think we can always give people the benefit of the doubt, I did it recently with Mr Saturday date who apparently lost his phone hence why he was awol all the first weekend of the week we started chatting, however that excuse plus all the other odd behaviour generally amounts to the same conclusion and that's a lying cheat. And my experience phone issues usually means there is a significant other in the picture who is the main reason for inconsistent contact.
Thanks, that’s spot on. We’re all different and handle our emotions differently. It’s a process and we do things in our own way and at our own pace. The situation evolved, as did I x@Bagpuss7 My favoured response is no response. I was never really into blocking, despite being blocked myself many times. I kind of like the thought of them checking their phone for once! Also there was a thread of Mumsnet advising dignified silence in these ridiculous games but on occasion I have sent the odd "coward" message as I don't believe letting them think they're irresistible makes me feel better! Of course at the moment none of these situations apply as I got to the end of my tether. I did get contacted during my Covid experience and that was a radio silence.Well done and to @Belle123 sometimes you just have to let time and events evolve to get there!
There’s never an excuse for lacking courtesy, even if you can’t message for a bit. What gets my back up with these sorts is the lack of starting with an apology and explanation. They just try and act normal instead, and hope you’ve had memory loss/are very forgiving. They try and get away with it. If a sincere explanation is offered, coupled with an effort to put it right, then fair enough. Anything less and it’s bullshit! Going to what @boomska said about her phone troubles, I bet you’d explain yourself as soon as you could and lay it on thick. You wouldn’t try and get away with it. It’s how the bullshitters behave that gives the game away, and not necessarily the fact they’ve gone quiet/missed the date or whatever has occurred.I was let down on a date. No phone call or text to explain. A week later a message "Hey babe () how are things? I asked why he hadn't messaged he couldn't make it? "There was an illness in the family & I couldn't exactly message in that situation could I?"
Get lost and no I won't be free again! Babe
Oh yeah totally- I’ll be so apologetic and suggest a date to see them again. And I know the name of someone I’m currently talking to so I could track him on Facebook but think that would be a bit too weird?! And I think this “distance” is doing us good to be honest!There’s never an excuse for lacking courtesy, even if you can’t message for a bit. What gets my back up with these sorts is the lack of starting with an apology and explanation. They just try and act normal instead, and hope you’ve had memory loss/are very forgiving. They try and get away with it. If a sincere explanation is offered, coupled with an effort to put it right, then fair enough. Anything less and it’s bullshit! Going to what @boomska said about her phone troubles, I bet you’d explain yourself as soon as you could and lay it on thick. You wouldn’t try and get away with it. It’s how the bullshitters behave that gives the game away, and not necessarily the fact they’ve gone quiet/missed the date or whatever has occurred.
And i don't know about anyone else but if I had seriously messed up I would call the person and either speak to them or leave a voice mail or even a voice note not a text!There’s never an excuse for lacking courtesy, even if you can’t message for a bit. What gets my back up with these sorts is the lack of starting with an apology and explanation. They just try and act normal instead, and hope you’ve had memory loss/are very forgiving. They try and get away with it. If a sincere explanation is offered, coupled with an effort to put it right, then fair enough. Anything less and it’s bullshit! Going to what @boomska said about her phone troubles, I bet you’d explain yourself as soon as you could and lay it on thick. You wouldn’t try and get away with it. It’s how the bullshitters behave that gives the game away, and not necessarily the fact they’ve gone quiet/missed the date or whatever has occurred.
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