Could you marry someone poor/minimum wage?

[littlewonder]

I have an uncle who’s rich. He has a huge indoor swimming pool. Anyway, we used to get knickers and socks from m&s for Christmas

i had a rich relative give me an out of date box of biscuits , clearly from their cupboard 🥲🥲🥲 if I had a rich partner who did that I’d dump them out of embarrassment, it’d have been better to just not give anything!!

(I’m not against gifting nice secondhand things though, me and a couple of friends have it pre-agreed that for presents any clothing/‘stuff’ should be secondhand, anything else should be edible, just because none of us really need gifts and we find thrifting fun)

 

[Lazarus]

Not really and to be quite frank im loving life and

no problem yes asian and half English but born here , my husband is also Asian heritage and you are right there is alot of emphasis often from that culture on doing well , being successful in well paid career etc if that is what you mean.
---

Thanks for answering.

 

[Snippysnips]

I have an uncle who’s rich. He has a huge indoor swimming pool. Anyway, we used to get knickers and socks from m&s for Christmas

Goes with my grandparents who always gifted me socks an bird feed, although one year I did get a birdhouse

Looking back on it now, I'd be absolutely over the moon with it all an respect that they did try their best, they knew I was a animal lover so I can see where they were coming from as an adult now but being a young child you sorta expected toys at Xmas so I'd be like urmmm thanks

 

[Penguinfeet]

some I think may even be on benefits / council housing.

The horror!! Not the council housing!!! bleeping hell

 

[Scorpihoe]

I’m in two minds about this. Please no hate here, I’m sharing a lot of personal feelings and this has caused me to have a lot of dependency issues as an adult.

I thought I’d offer my perspective…I grew up very wealthy, my dad worked a lot and always made sure we lived in luxury. Around the time I was born, my dad was in the height of his career with so much property, he was always so busy, I barely saw him. He actually missed my birth because he was in a meeting, when my mum went into labour, and he refused to leave the meeting. We didn’t see him a lot as kids, but my mums a housewife and she took care of us at home. I’m in my mid 20s but I’ve never paid a bill (not that I would even know how to), never paid rent on any flat I’ve lived in, I still get a monthly allowance to my bank account, from my dad, and the first time I did laundry was at uni, because we always had a cleaner. I am basically an adult child, if you can call it that. I have so much anxiety about actually working, and depend on my parents for everything.

I was taken advantage of a bit in my first relationship. Because money was never an issue, I never looked for it in relationships. My first boyfriend worked but would make me pay for everything we did. My second boyfriend (now husband), came from nothing. His family are in masses of debt and live on credit cards. He was the complete opposite of me and moved out when he was 16. Incredibly independent, and I looked up to him. We were at uni when we met and he would always joke to me that one day he’s gonna make it big. I always laughed at him, because I just didn’t care. I didn’t care if he made it big or not because I loved him and how he took care of me, he taught me how to live life, to cook meals, to change my bedsheets (embarrasing at my age not knowing how to do that, I know). How he could have £3 left in his account but he’d use it to buy me a kinder egg. But he found something he was good at, and now he’s 25 and on a £60k salary.

my point is, if I had narrowed my search to men who are wealthy, who can give me the same life my dad has given me, I wouldn’t have found my absolute gem of a husband, and my soulmate

sorry for rambling but you get the picture

 

[rainbowlemon]

"I don’t need a Ferrari / Lamborghini but I don’t want to go back to having a basic car".

A range rover is pretty basic though. Can you actually afford the Ferrari though?

Also where's the family estate dating back to the 16th century ?

Do you also have connections to the royal family?

I've been around super rich folk. My private school was in central London, but not everyone honestly carried on like this. The richest woman I know personally shops at Aldi and so does my father who retired early at 46 and mainly just does one shift a week. My dad drives a 16 year old Toyota and can choose to do what he wants with his time.

 

[littlewonder]

How he could have £3 left in his account but he’d use it to buy me a kinder egg.

I’m not crying, it’s just raining on my face 🥹

 

[WhatABore]

Tbh, I just think you're someone who wants that lifestyle and you live through the Instagrammers you follow.
95% of your posts on Tattle are questioning how someone can afford the things they show in their life. Or insisting that the people aren't as rich as they appear.
You're obsessed with other people's wealth and whether they're 'rich' or not

Just over a year ago you said you lived in a flat, now own some expensive house and your business was just starting up but within a year, you earn 50k after expenses.

 

[latranla]

Tbh, I just think you're someone who wants that lifestyle and you live through the Instagrammers you follow.
95% of your posts on Tattle are questioning how someone can afford the things they show in their life. Or insisting that the people aren't as rich as they appear.
You're obsessed with other people's wealth and whether they're 'rich' or not

Just over a year ago you said you lived in a flat, now own some expensive house and your business was just starting up but within a year, you earn 50k after expenses.

Correct we lived in a flat which we now rent out and moved to a house and yes to the second point because I like conversations which revolve around money , wealth , life style goals and nice things ! Never once said I was rich ( whatever you all class as rich anyway) or claimed I could by a Ferrari so not sure where these comments are coming from asking me if I can afford a Ferrari or people banging on here about knowing people who are much richer than me .

 

[DaisyDaisy87]

Correct we lived in a flat which we rent out and moved to house ! Yes because I like conversations about money , wealth , life style goals and nice things !

Shouldn’t you be busy shifting your Herbalife or is Monday your ‘day off?’

 

[rainbowlemon]

At this point this seems relevant:

 

[Baby Giraffe]

Correct we lived in a flat which we now rent out and moved to a house and yes to the second point because I like conversations which revolve around money , wealth , life style goals and nice things !

Funny that you want to talk about what you think are nice things which all seem to be wealth and money related but most people think talking about money is somewhat gauche and bragging about wealth is offensive so not at all nice.

 

[Bob93]

My focus is nice and luxurious thanks very much. Has everything a Merc would have just without the fancy badges.

Bet you drive an Audi. (Explains a lot)

Hey I drive an Audi and think OP sounds a right arse

 

[latranla]

Shouldn’t you be busy shifting your Herbalife or is Monday your ‘day off?’

Yuck to that I

"I don’t need a Ferrari / Lamborghini but I don’t want to go back to having a basic car".

A range rover is pretty basic though. Can you actually afford the Ferrari though?

Also where's the family estate dating back to the 16th century ?

Do you also have connections to the royal family?

I've been around super rich folk. My private school was in central London, but not everyone honestly carried on like this. The richest woman I know personally shops at Aldi and so does my father who retired early at 46 and mainly just does one shift a week. My dad drives a 16 year old Toyota and can choose to do what he wants with his time.

Good for him I just would not want to go back to driving a Toyota personally , I simply prefer ranges / Porsche 4x4 cars now even though I said to my husband I really don’t want a big car and was scared to drive them first especially around london ! Really don’t see what the big deal is , never claimed to say I can buy a Ferrari / Lamborghini or wan one, my husband does though as he loves cars and his dad has a Ferrari and spends hours looking at cars and going to car shows together ( that’s nope my thing) , one of his goals to own a super car one day… suppose this will anger the snow flakes in here too !

 

[pinkmug]

I grew up kinda poor, I don't think anybody would imagine it just looking at us but money was a constant cause of stress and many many fights. So many debts, power cut, phone line cut due to unpaid bills etc. That taught me one thing, I don't want to struggle the same way again and I don't want to spend my life with someone who doesn't feel the same way about money.

That doesn't mean I'd pick someone rich that I didn't love over someone broke that I do love. But I found that the approach to money is more important than how much of it you have. What is "necessary", what is non-negotiable, what is a luxury and what is senseless spending? What will be our priorities once we get the bare necessities outnof the way? Does my partner value spending over saving? Is dining out at a nice place once in a while unnecessary for him? Does he prefer spending money on items or experiences? Is it comfort over cheaper prices, or do we decide to slum it in order to spend the money on something better? As long as we're on the same page, I don't think I'd care if he didn't want to become a high executive or didn't earn six figures.

Financial security is very important to me but everyone has a different idea of what it means to be comfortable. I'd want to know that we have our bills, home, health and emergencies covered. I'd want to know we wouldn't be a few bad months away from having our gas or power cut, or being on the streets. I'd want to know that I can trust my partner with priorities and budgeting. Other than that, I don't mind. I have my own income, it's not a High Income™ but I'm content with it, especially since I usually get to leave work on time and my workload doesn't make me want to depend on Adderall or cocaine to cope with 160 hour work weeks. I'm not an engineer or a doctor or a lawyer, I'm not in finance etc so I'll probably never earn big salaries either.

I wouldn't call myself ambitious regarding career or money, I have other needs and wants in life so I don't expect that from a partner either. Actually someone whose entire mental energy is on the next promotion or the next raise would bring me down big time. It'd be amazing never to think about the cost of something I want to buy ever again, but not at the cost of my mental or physical health and I wouldn't want it for my spouse either.

 

[shadowcat5]

Lifestyle business
I’m not saying anymore. I really am not. That says it all!

And much as you think you’re not looking down on people- you very much are. My outfit today would probably horrify you (Primark sweatshirt and top, New Look jeggings) but you know what I’m comfortable and happy with what I’m wearing. I have a hoodie in the wardrobe that cost me £350 from Harrods, and another hoodie that cost me £250 (not from Harrods though) they’re all that’s left from when I was doing better. If it weren’t for the fact that the £350 hoodie has a hole in it and the £250 hoodie is so heavy and warm it saves a fortune on heating I would have sold them too. There are things that are more important than money.

Also you keep banging on that you have a child (we get it hun. More or less every single response you mention that) is it really the best lesson to be giving your child that all you should aspire to is marrying a rich partner?!

totally off topic here but are new look leggings any good? Mine are from primark and they are okay but I want some that are better quality as mine are starting to wear now and I find they start to look cheap really quickly (I wear them every day so understandable and I've got good use out of them for about £2.50). I thought about matalan but wanted to explore other options a well?

 

[Hope96]

Take a shot every time @latranla mentions Toyota... be prepared to be on the floor though.

 

[princessmaire80]

totally off topic here but are new look leggings any good? Mine are from primark and they are okay but I want some that are better quality as mine are starting to wear now and I find they start to look cheap really quickly (I wear them every day so understandable and I've got good use out of them for about £2.50). I thought about matalan but wanted to explore other options a well?

Sorry, I have no idea! I’m wearing NL jeggings today. I buy my everyday leggings from Primark too (I like the £5 high waisted ones) I’m told that Sainsbury’s luxury leggings are excellent but they’re a bit more than £2.50!

 

[WhatABore]

Yuck to that I

Good for him I just would not want to go back to driving a Toyota personally , I simply prefer ranges / Porsche 4x4 cars now even though I said to my husband I really don’t want a big car and was scared to drive them first especially around london ! Really don’t see what the big deal is , never claimed to say I can buy a Ferrari / Lamborghini or wan one, my husband does though as he loves cars and his dad has a Ferrari and spends hours looking at cars and going to car shows together ( that’s nope my thing) , one of his goals to own a super car one day… suppose this will anger the snow flakes in here too !

People thinking you're a snob and judgemental ect doesn't make them snowflakes

 

[miss_americana]

Yuck to that I

Good for him I just would not want to go back to driving a Toyota personally , I simply prefer ranges / Porsche 4x4 cars now even though I said to my husband I really don’t want a big car and was scared to drive them first especially around london ! Really don’t see what the big deal is , never claimed to say I can buy a Ferrari / Lamborghini or wan one, my husband does though as he loves cars and his dad has a Ferrari and spends hours looking at cars and going to car shows together ( that’s nope my thing) , one of his goals to own a super car one day… suppose this will anger the snow flakes in here too !

I’m not a snowflake. I just don’t have time for people who judge others and are arrogant snobs.

(I also love Ford focus’)