You are not selfish or a failure my love. None of us has ever been through something like this before - how are we supposed to feel/react? We all handle things differently and no one is right or wrong. This is a legitimately very scary time for all of us, we have no idea what is going to happen and when life will be ok. How you are feeling is so so normal and understandable. I am a mental health worker and honestly this situation has shaken myself. I have had hours in bed having a good cry about it. I have 11 week old baby twins and I am terrified. I don't know when I will see my partner again. It hurts. But we will all be ok. Breathe, focus on the little things, set yourself a little challenge (e.g I will read a new book a week) limit the news you watch - I now no longer watch any of the news, I may sound stupid but if something important changes I'll see it on social media or friends will text. Remember it is ok to feel how you feel! You don't have to come out of this some rockstar who's nailed 1000 new hobbies. Have a good cry and binge TV if you need to!!! Your partner sounds absolutely lovely. Stay strong I am sending lots of virtual hugs. If you need anyone to talk to throughout the day all I'm doing is constantly feeding babies so I am more than happy to listen xxxI’ve been posting in the generic C group (I refer to it as C because I don’t like typing or saying it). I came here because I’m so petrified of C. I’ve been signed off work, admin NHS so I feel so bad I’m not helping, but the surgery is a hot clinic for people with symptoms and I can’t even fathom going back Monday in the state I’m in. I’m seeking mental health support but it’s all taking so long. I am trying various other sources like online stuff to help. But it’s not helping. I’m so petrified- I’ve developed a phobia and huge overwhelming fear of C. My partner is so supportive and she is helping me. I have fleeting thoughts of wondering how I’ll continue living knowing it’s not going away anytime soon, I’m usually a very stoical 40yr old woman but this has paralysed me with fear. I’ll speak to my GP tomorrow but they have said they have nothing they can help me with other than my usual medication and that I need to keep at the mental health thing. The only reason I haven’t had to call crisis lines is because my partner is amazing- she’s working though so I’m home alone a lot. Are there any words of wisdom that will help my head click back to normal? I feel selfish and a failure and I’m struggling.
I know what you mean about waking up and you feel ok for 10 seconds then it’s like I’m living a nightmare. I am so petrified of life right now
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Thank you so so much x hope you and twins are well x
Thank you. I sent you an email
It’s a persistent cough that you need to be looking for , this means coughing a lot for more than an hour, or 3 or more coughing episodes in 24 hours (if you usually have a cough, it may be worse than usual)
Been a bit more anxious today.spoke to my GP who signed me off for two more weeks.
I just keep hearing there will be more waves of C (I don’t type whole word-freaks me out). My partner keeps prompting me to stop reading news on my phone- she means so well but I find it hard.
Spoke to mental health earlier and they are calling me next week. Spoke to GP and she prescribed beta blockers for anxiety. But now I’m like- omg what if they affect me and I end up with an issue that will make C worse if I get it. See the way my mind works!
I miss my family so much- but so does everyone and I feel selfish writing that. I have 8yr old niece and I used to hang out with her almost daily. She’s like a daughter to me- I’m 40 with no kids so she defo is the child of my heart. I see her on FaceTime daily but it’s like a punch in my stomach that I can’t see her. But like I say everyone is the same.
I’m an hour away from family now as I’m at my partners since we are both keyworkers so made sense that I moved in because then I wasn’t risking my elderly parents health. But I guess even if I was 10mins away from them I still couldn’t see them.
Sorry this is like me just blurting my thoughts out- waffling. Hope everyone is doing ok x
I just keep hearing there will be more waves of C (I don’t type whole word-freaks me out). My partner keeps prompting me to stop reading news on my phone- she means so well but I find it hard.
Spoke to mental health earlier and they are calling me next week. Spoke to GP and she prescribed beta blockers for anxiety. But now I’m like- omg what if they affect me and I end up with an issue that will make C worse if I get it. See the way my mind works!
I miss my family so much- but so does everyone and I feel selfish writing that. I have 8yr old niece and I used to hang out with her almost daily. She’s like a daughter to me- I’m 40 with no kids so she defo is the child of my heart. I see her on FaceTime daily but it’s like a punch in my stomach that I can’t see her. But like I say everyone is the same.
I’m an hour away from family now as I’m at my partners since we are both keyworkers so made sense that I moved in because then I wasn’t risking my elderly parents health. But I guess even if I was 10mins away from them I still couldn’t see them.
Sorry this is like me just blurting my thoughts out- waffling. Hope everyone is doing ok x
I’m the same- every time my partner clears her throat I freak out but I think if it is a C cough then it would be more obvious- more persistent.
Got it. Will reply ASAPThank you. I sent you an email
Ahh i feel so tit and exhausted yet cant sleep at all. I just feel so confused - like I don't know what to think. I keep doing stupid stuff but I don't care and feel like I can't stop myself. I had wrote a long post but just deleted it.. feel like I'm being annoying or posting too much sometimes. I don't know why I find it easier sometimes to post on tattle than text a friend but then I don't wanna seem selfish posting so much about myself or triggering if I mention something that upsets other people on here.
Don’t be silly, post as much as you like. I hope you slept in the end x
Still awake lol but hopefully be sleeping soon. I wish I was someone who can write to the point and concise but I always write huge paragraphs about absolutely everything.
thank you though might post something again people have helped me before on tattle and been really nice but I am always scared of being annoying or people disagreeing with what a say and just having a go at me. I know everyone has the right to their opinions I'm just super sensitive xxHonestly don’t worry but also feel free to privately message if you need to. Often writing it all down gets it ‘off your chest’ and helps xStill awake lol but hopefully be sleeping soon. I wish I was someone who can write to the point and concise but I always write huge paragraphs about absolutely everything.
Exactly this- it’s 5.34am and I just woke after 3hrs sleep with a terrible nightmare- the type where you are frozen when you wake and can’t move- the nightmare was horrific.
I know exactly what you mean- I tend to blurt my thoughts on here- but feel like I’m just “me me me”......I don’t think anyone minds when we blurt our thoughts here as it’s a support thread- keep posting- get it all out of your mind. I’m listening. I’m crap with advice as I’m not functioning at moment but I am listening.
I can’t go on for months like this
....I need to get to a point where I can cope better.Anyway I hope everyone is ok on this thread- sending hugs to all
I just don't know if it should really be on this thread too - because most of it isn't Coronavirus related directly it's just that the lockdown is making already difficult things more difficult. Although i think alot of people can relate to that. I really wouldn't want to upset anyone else either. I know some people write "trigger warning" at the start of start of quite sensitive topics but sometimes it still catches your eye when your scrolling past a post talking about something you'd want to avoid and it can make you feel worse.Exactly this- it’s 5.34am and I just woke after 3hrs sleep with a terrible nightmare- the type where you are frozen when you wake and can’t move- the nightmare was horrific.
I know exactly what you mean- I tend to blurt my thoughts on here- but feel like I’m just “me me me”......I don’t think anyone minds when we blurt our thoughts here as it’s a support thread- keep posting- get it all out of your mind. I’m listening. I’m crap with advice as I’m not functioning at moment but I am listening.
I can’t go on for months like this
Anyway I hope everyone is ok on this thread- sending hugs to all
Awh I'm not great with advice either, I feel like I try my best but it's difficult to know what to say in some situations. It just helps knowing your not alone sometimes - sorry your struggling too, sending hugs back
I hope you get to a place soon where you feel more able to deal with this awful and difficult time xxxOh I'm sorry to read this, I've been struggling, too, so wanted to reach out. Are you worried about one thing in particular or are you generally scared and anxious? I'm incredibly anxious and almost dont want to leave the house as I'm scared to be near anyone. Went out early yesterday and someone was coughing in the queue behind me and I can't stop thinking about it, worrying I'll catch the virus, but I did have my scarf by my face and moved away a bit, but it's hard when you're in a queue. I woke with a bit of a sore throat, so I'm worried about that and it's never ending.
If you want to chat privately, just message. Take care. 
xxHello.thankfully I haven't had too much anxiety regarding the virus itself but a lot of my anxiety surrounds the lockdown and my university work. really struggle working from home and have multiple large assignments coming up that are super important and I Can't find any concentration to get them done.
Being stuck in really isn't helping. It's actually just make me realise how little friends I really have as it doesn't feel much different to usual... which is getting me down.
Just catching up on some posts and I wanted to say I'm remote working from college and was supposed to work on my assignments over easter but haven't done anything, been too anxious and just wanted to curl up and do nothing. Need to get a piece submitted by Monday, so I'll make a start later, just dont have much motivation... 
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Awh thank you and sorry to hear your struggling too.Oh I'm sorry to read this, I've been struggling, too, so wanted to reach out. Are you worried about one thing in particular or are you generally scared and anxious? I'm incredibly anxious and almost dont want to leave the house as I'm scared to be near anyone. Went out early yesterday and someone was coughing in the queue behind me and I can't stop thinking about it, worrying I'll catch the virus, but I did have my scarf by my face and moved away a bit, but it's hard when you're in a queue. I woke with a bit of a sore throat, so I'm worried about that and it's never ending.
I have anxiety, depression & ptsd so I struggle with my mental health and this year has been particularly hard as a whole even before the virus situation. Lol at the end of 2019 I was totally thinking 2020 was going to be the year things got better for me and it's been one of the worst times I've had in a long time. Lockdown has made it more difficult but then if we werent in this situation I'd still be finding things really hard right now but it just adds to it. Last week I was feeling how you are now so worried. About catching it, thinking any symptom I had meant I had it even just a little cough, wasn't going to leave the house at all just getting food delivered but lately I just don't care as much. I don't know why. I'm more concerned about the things I've been dealing with for years. I feel like I've suddenly went from being scared to catch it and die to not following the "rules" as much like I wasn't getting any unnessary packages incase they were contaminated but now I've ordered things online, I wasnt getting ordering takeaways for worrying about who was cooking them and I've had four this past week, stopped smoking because I was so scared after seeing a woman in hospital saying if you smoke stop because it will be so much harder to fight this virus now ive started again and I've been outside the past few days walks and shopping. Not breaking the official "rules" though but I want to and I feel guilty saying that, I just want to go see a friend or that, im sure i won't though cos I don't want to put anyone else at risk. But people are telling me it's good I'm less anxious and being a bit more relaxed but it's only because I feel like I don't care if I die anymore 
xx
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Danielle, nobody is going to have a go at you for posting on here.Awh thank you and sorry to hear your struggling too.
If you are feeling that way perhaps you need to give your GP a call.
I don’t like to think of you sitting at home alone having thoughts like that but I also don’t feel qualified enough to give you proper advice.
Is there anyone you can confide in? Have you explained to them why you’re feeling less anxious now? They need to know, they wouldn’t want you to be feeling like this alone.
xx
I feel like I've pushed a lot of my friends away. When I was feeling anxious I asked people when they call me not talk to me about the news because it was making me feel worse. Then they kept doing it and I understood that they may have just forgot but I'd be more stressed coming off the phone to them than before so I just gave up with speaking to them. Im only talking to two friends the now in a group chat with them and one of them is struggling a lot herself with her own issues the now. The other friend I am close to her but she's 19 I'm 22 and since we met I feel like I'm the one that looks out for her and she'd really not know what to say/do if I spoke to her about all this. I got paid £343 yesterday and next get paid on the 1st April and have £70 left not even paid my wifi and phone bill yet, didn't even buy much food when I went shopping I've spent it on fags, gave money to my friend and ordered her food too cos when I said I was getting pizza she said that sounds good so I just done it, I spent money on a live stream chat but the money was being raised for the NHS so it's a good cause but I couldn't really afford how much I gave to it. It's just like I wanna make my situation worse and I know I shouldn't but I can't stop myself from doing it. I went through all my Facebook and deleted all embarrassing posts and photos off instagram that I didn't want to be online forever just felt like I had to do it incase I do die. I have issues with some of my family especially my mum and she tried to contact me on Facebook on Mothers Day about how she wanted to fix everything now. Although I went into foster care because of abuse she put me through, then I ended up going back to hers at 16, then I ran away and ending up homeless and I've told her so many times to stop messaging me and blocking her then she makes another account few months later. I'm always scared to leave the house incase I see her usually and the one time I know I won't because she's self isolating I can't even just enjoy being outside. I have went to the GP before for my mental health I should go and call them but I don't. It was my Case Worker at the homeless shelter that dealt with it all before she'd phone them and take me and since now I got my own house I just haven't done anything myself. It's hard going from having that support to not. Sorry this is so long xx
I know I need to either try to help myself andbsort my life out or just accept that I can't and that's that be a mess and don't care. But I keep thinking differently all the time I can't keep up with it anymore. but thank you @50sGirl I do appreciate you and everyone else on here that's replied and tried to help me xx
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@Danielle1 For emotional support you can call the Samaritans 24-hour helpline on 116 123, they are a listening ear, and will be able to help and advise you. As said before your GP will help you also, please get the courage to make that call.
There are a few issues that you have and they need to be broken down separately. Delete Facebook would be the first, it’s a terrible drain whilst you concentrate on yourself and getting your mind straight. Try a podcast on rewiring your brain, it really helped me in a short time. Things will get better, and you’ll feel proud to have reached out to help yourself. Make that call to gp and then ring to the samaraitans for support
There are a few issues that you have and they need to be broken down separately. Delete Facebook would be the first, it’s a terrible drain whilst you concentrate on yourself and getting your mind straight. Try a podcast on rewiring your brain, it really helped me in a short time. Things will get better, and you’ll feel proud to have reached out to help yourself. Make that call to gp and then ring to the samaraitans for support
Oh sweetie I’m so sorry you feel like this- I kinda do too. But I’ve got safety nets of people I could never let down. My partner works in the police and told me about the shout text message service. Google it. I’ve used it as I can’t talk to people much as I can’t explain or end up being so upset the person on the phone can’t understand me. Shout is texting so I found that helped.
Just try try try to find something to focus on- it’s so hard I know- this time in life sucks so much. Just come on here and write whatever you need to please- this thread does seem supportive. Just write whatever you need to x sending big hugs- I like to think of a day in the future when we all get through this and we message on here about all our new plans and happy things!
https://www.giveusashout.org/Awh thank you and sorry to hear your struggling too.
That’s the website for shout text message service. I wanted to post it so it’s easier for you to find.
Absolutely no one should feel guilty about letting their feelings loose on a support thread. That’s precisely what it’s there for. Better out than in after all. Hope everyone is managing okay.
I’m finding I have a couple of ‘okay’ days where I can sort of keep myself on an even keel, I don’t feel great but I don’t feel awful either, and then I have a really hard day where I feel totally fed up and depressed. Took a comment on another thread personally due to my mood and feel like a complete dick head. Everything is getting to me today, so I think I’m going to try and ‘be kind’ to myself, run a bath whilst my partner looks after the children, and hope that helps me feel better.
I’m finding I have a couple of ‘okay’ days where I can sort of keep myself on an even keel, I don’t feel great but I don’t feel awful either, and then I have a really hard day where I feel totally fed up and depressed. Took a comment on another thread personally due to my mood and feel like a complete dick head. Everything is getting to me today, so I think I’m going to try and ‘be kind’ to myself, run a bath whilst my partner looks after the children, and hope that helps me feel better.
@Danielle1 I can’t add to the advice already given. Please make those call/texts and post here as much as you need to xx
@Bitofthebubbly it’s so easy to take things personally on a forum. Happened to me the other week when I had a snide reply to my post. The typed word is so easy to misconstrue. Don’t feel like a head and enjoy your bath xx