So on this relatively beautiful day of dawn I’ve made it to well known member, I should be absolutely buzzing about this relatively monumental occasion but naw…… this fud has put me on a right Debbie downer… spending his annual leave showing his fans last years xmas decorations…… I just canny
Cleaning with Mario #80 Snakes oan this app, Marion hisses. His new scent is Be Inspired 1,000 Wishes
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Imagine if later he said, sorry lovelies, duck the seasonal shite, me and Deek are off to Benidorm for a week 
nah me neither
nah me neither
There will be a stench of wealth on that train and nae debates. Hope you’ll be sporting a lovely mother of the bride number and clutching your wee neck hen whilst you sit doon getting all warum and cosy
I just saw on Sky news that M&S are giving their staff another pay rise. Marion will be all excited about getting more of Dereks ££££ to spend in B&M.
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And you can already guarantee the shite Marion will buy with the £250 voucher.
Anyone else wondering what he’s been cooking in the Ninja that he SO needed?
Margrit ma lovelie, does this now mean am an influencer? I hope you’ve got some Ugg slippers to wear we that cosy wee hoosecowat.
Who on earth needs christum (new bespoke word) decorations inspiration. He gets it all from b&m, or it looks like he does, it's the same cheap stuff anyone can get anywhere. Deek cut his bleeping head off and stick it in top of the tree, that's what I call innovation.
Don't let that creepy imbecile get to you lovely. He's a nobody
I wish he’s learn to use punctuation correctly. What’s with the question marks when what he’s saying isn’t a question. ‘Right I need to talk Christmas?’ 
I think he'll do his Christmas collab with:
I just don’t understand why anyone is letting this shart stain collab with them. Surely it’s not bringing them in any sales. Even in the world of insta he’s a nobody 
I only know him from tattle and then got hooked on his car crash of a life 
I only know him from tattle and then got hooked on his car crash of a life 
Another mug for the mug ! Seriously …does he think we believe someone gave him that ! I mean for someone who has NO visitors he has a lot of mugs lol
"COONCIL_DINNERS_WAE_MAZDA"
Fine foods from the pauper of paisley
Fine foods from the pauper of paisley
“All in air fryer”.. well it’s literally just frozen food and some wee frozen veg warmed up. He has to be trolling us the naw hens. And amount a that salt 
Half a tonne of salt, jesus, he's going to pickle himself. Could murder a toasted outsider with an inch of butter thou"COONCIL_DINNERS_WAE_MAZDA"
Fine foods from the pauper of paisley
No wonder this cunts on DLA
Jesus Mary and Joseph wit the duck is that muck they’re eating?!?!?!?!?
She cannae wait to share her Christmas shite with us all next well...
She’s pure affronted doing stories in front of Deek yet she’s managed to do a couple tonight sat next to him. Make it make sense
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