Cleaning with Mario #123 Denek & Manio Costa Teguise, Lanzarote Spain. Also

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Ahhhhh I need to catch up on the dots of doom, but I’m having a wee pint in the sun with pals, so don’t wanna be rude, but managed to catch safeguarding………. Has he been reading ofsted reports or something???? Where’s he learnt that???
 
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His lack of confidence is from trying to keep up with everyone on that app that isnae his joab, his joab is his joab and not that app. The people trying to break him are the people on the app that influence him to try and keep up with the people in the app that isnae his joab!

He thinks we are the bad guys but we are the ones who see through the damage the influencing gang do to your mental health and your bank balance!
 
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I’m new to this pair so sorry if this has been asked before, what’s the obsession with perfumes? I’ve never known someone to take so many on holiday 🫠
Youse ur in fur a treat hen when youse see his make up collection and his buckled shelves

I highly recommend the wiki, then look at the most liked posts. Never fails to make me laugh. #factual
 
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The noticeboard in the polis station??
 
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Ma luvly, ahm chanting you oan fae the rooftops, ah kin smell yer wealth fae here! You huv safeguarded that expense wae the toddler leftovers, so brave, so inspiring.

Me maself, ah was at Stravaigin last night wae MrMac (IYKYKIYDKGTK) and today am having some fine dining egg in a cup (also! IYKYKIYDKGTK) fur ma lunch. Aw aboot that balance, ma lovely
 
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Fine dining? He hasn't ever eaten fine dining. He had an Indian, a full English, a waffle and a steak. Bog bloody standard. I supposed compared to Castlevecchi that's an improvement but fine dining it is not.
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I think I'm gonna have a fine dining lunch, marmite on toast anyone?
 
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Mario “basic food is naw fur me, I like to go out and experience fine dining”. Marion also goes for pizza, steak, Italian
 
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He’s got some cheek saying the hotel food is basic, we’ve aw seen your cooking attempts hen. They love to dine oot and love fine dining at home? Where? The chippy?

Also loved the wee motivational speech at the end for those with disabilities - do not let it hold you back! I, Mario can confirm you will be catered to in this hotel and Lanza as a whole. Fuck me he made it sound like a dementia village the way he kept saying you canny get lost.
 
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And after that rambling about their high food standards. Posts a pic of a fry up.

Yeh couldnae make this muppit up.
 

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If that’s what he classifies as “fine dining” then I’m scared to ask what he would consider “normal” food! 🫣

Sorry had to edit “Deek knows his coffee”??! Umm he looks like he knows the difference between coffee and pond water but that’s about as far as it goes
 
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Manio, ma wee oxygen thief, they dinnae do self catering. Ah know ye didn’t know so av got ye tae know, wae that wee boujie small business Jet2.
 
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Fooking hell.



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The hotel probably didn't have a trough of chips for the pig to eat through every meal.

I've been to this hotel (a long time ago) and what I remember of the food it was a lot of Spanish dishes like paella etc....ya know local dishes that he's probably never heard of coz he's an uncultured wee freak that eats fry ups and chinese take aways 7 days a week.
 
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Too much to decipher from his dots of doom, went inclusive tae safeguard, but ate oot as he's a fussy eater, likes fine dining at hame ....spoons breakfast, pizza crunch at the chippy and jam jars serving Tesco frozen veg mix with every meal. Got a bus all by themselves and didn't get lost, even though they had never been to island before. Hotel cater for all disabilities and even gave Beak a full bib so he didn't spill anything on his OOTD, also.



Definitely didn't want to sit about all day at reception, saved that for night time.

Ah need a drink before looking at remainder of dots of doom.
 
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Probably social work reports when he moved into wee Deek's bedsit, wit wi wee Deek being a vulnerable person.
 
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EXPERIENCE OF FINE DINING? OK... Castle Avicci, Spoons, Jamjar, M&S Cafe..

FUSSY PERSON? Diet consists of pizza, chips, and everything else beige.

ITS BASIC AND STANDARD SO HE DIDN'T LIKE IT? - Never out of his local chippy the fat slut and frequents spoons on the daily.

NOT DRINKERS? - Owns a drinks trolley in a 1 bed flat, not to mention the endless sangria he buys by the litre not the glass, cocktails, kopparbergs and vodka cokes/malibus on this holiday

THE HOTEL WASN'T FOR HIM FOOD WISE? - then the next slide on his wee video shows us two bog standard fry ups from a cafe

Who the fuck does he actually think he is though? he has to be a parody?
I'm dead my lovelies.

PS, the way he is banging on as if none of us have been on a holiday telling us that people with disabilities can have a ground floor room and there is a room to store your suitcases... probably the same as every hotel I've been to.

Anyway,

Costa Teguise in Lanzorate
New York in America
Paisley in Glasgow, Scotland.

Also.


Edited to add i still have the dots of doom playing and he is still BANGING ON ABOUT FOOD!!!!!!!
 
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