Cleaning with Mario #104 I clean my bin in the shower & my name is my power.. Also

[Caw1982]

Just catching up now with the ugly little scroat.

No one needs to know what you've cleaned you freak show, because newsflash, we all know how to clean our homes
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Middle aged fanny what he is What a way to live.
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I think I'll bleach my arsehole that day. It'll be more exciting
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I'm genuinely confused how he can be so shit at decor, for someone that spends months planning a coffee stayshun. His kitchen looks like one you get at work. I'm half expecting to see an A4 piece of paper stuck on the fridge saying wash your pots, or Babs tupperware with her fucking stinking fish in it ready to cause carnage at 12.30 when she pops the lid.
It's grim.
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How much stuff do you actually even need in the bathroom though!? I have one wee cabinet in mine and that’s enough to store spare bog rolls, a replacement shampoo, body wash and hand wash, cotton buds, a cleaning spray, tampons, and a wee wash bag with stuff I use to wash my face. Then in the shower I have a wee shelf with just the products I actually use while I’m in there. That’s it! At this point his whole hoose is just a storage container

I imagine Maz needs alot of Tampons, the massive fanny.

 

[Badaboom]

Totally thought he was talking to himself there ffs. Also.

 

[menopausalmargrit]

Haud the McGill's bus, ah thought they phoned every driving instructor in the UK and Beirut and none of them had space, even wi Martin's blue tick????

Feck me, this makes my text box editing of pichures look professional, time fur me tae set up a wee bespoke small business oan that app and get sum oaf Deek's petty cash.
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Speaking of which, if Deek slid intae his DMs, does that mean Deek huz an Insta account?

Fab tip? The cunt has never been abroad and here he is like Paisleys answer to Gloria Hunniford!!!

 

[bubbity09]

Kitchen wrap hasn’t lasted long!

 

[Shrekssister]

Here we go. Middle aged twat. And it's "I'll" upload not "al"

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I've put my dinner on also its "microwave meal" in the scent "chilli con carne"

 

[Ferguson]

That voice that he uses for Dully the BeeJong Dug gives me Savile vibes.

Hope you'se are aww cosy and ready for the big reveal also.

 

[Doingitforthegramhuntake2]

Shelve It honestly baffles me how someone can be so fucking thick!!!

 

[Exhausted Pigeon]

Is it really?

Yes it is, so sit the fuck down dickhead.

 

[Madge2022]

The Home Collection by Mario.

For the hunners of millions of you'se that aspire to cuckoo a bedsit on a rough council estate & fill it with cheap plastic tat.

#boujee
#bespoke
#also

The cooncil collection.

 

[Kat__lax]

Trying to be Andrew Wheatcroft yet again with the crass unnecessary vulgarity, acting like brands are tripping over themselves to secure a deal with him. Ok OG in Instagram of 5 years how many paid partnerships have you had? With the exception of ava may how many have been regular and resulted in a healthy return? I’ll wait… also buying the product yourself and pretending it’s an ad doesn’t count!!!

 

[Shrekssister]

Cannae believe you nasty wee cows moved without telling me I was nearly ready to circum to withdrawls!!! Luckily I remembered ma names ma power and that I hud tae get up so it’s fine now

 

[hopethishelpsallthebest]

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I like to call this you’re an idiot

Christ on a bike, he wrote hey, not hay.

 

[Madge2022]

Check oot wee Deek enjoying the quality of a real corner sofa.

Miss Dollleee looks like she's in a hostage situation. Everytime ah see her wi strangler fingers I get silence of the lambs vibes.

 

[Madge2022]

I reckon he's gone to the charity shop to snag another cardi belonging to Great Aunty Mavis before she died.

Aunty Mavis probably died in the one he was wearing earlier
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Oh good god. Fat pig has been eating all day. He rolled home.
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[Ferguson]

54 comments = not even 0.05% of your "followers"

1 order.

Aye definitely the right time tae release your home range.

Amazing.
Nay wunner you're the OG of that app.

 

[Babybail93]

Make it Make sense. Marion the fat slut with a frogs throat, a nose that has more bumps on it than a London road, rotters hair and a nasty selfish personality. Then Domboi who looks nice and isn't unfortunate looking like or wee Marion. Like what is Deek thinking?


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Maybe it was Dom who fucked Derek off because he’s a massive stoner with rank breath caused by the rotting gums. Also, the fact Derek is a massive racist. He’s no a catch

 

[Madge2022]

I bet he sits doon on the staff room sofa, criss, joos, hoosecoat tae read tattle aww cosy every day.

Then gets fumming and starts stomping roon the bedsit having a bitch fit. Wee Deek too stoned to notice.

Asking his polis work colleagues (definitely no pals) oan his 15 minute shift if they kin arrest us, if he shines their truncheons extra speshul.
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Also Also Also Also Also Also

That’s all lovelies ALSO

Ah'm getting quite expert in this editing (adding text box) malarkey, oor resident artist @hopethishelpsallthebest will be livid and calling me her troll

 

[Shrekssister]

Watching your figure what? Expand? Slag

 

[Madge2022]

going through a break up right now so feeling pretty shite about my life, but feeling better now cause all the above apply to me. Got a career, a home and I’m not a drain on society so aye happy F R I D A Y my lovelies also

Oh hen

Just visualize your ex wi a beak like Martin, wearing the honking hoosecoat and smelling like a black orchid wax melt. Lucky escape #soaye

 

[HappyLittleSnail]

He's so predictable.

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Monday moods.

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Autumn in July, Christmas in October. Packing for his holiday NEXT YEAR! He's literally just wishing his life away.