Childfree by choice #6 Sleeping well at night, petition for childfree flights

[Saddlesoap]

Like why did those two users even venture into this thread in the first place. I know the Boddler topic came up, but how did they know

I wouldn't consider going into the TTC thread, or New Baby threads

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

There's a thread on Mumsnet at the moment about how mental health problems are exploding in the 30-35 year age group because people are being encouraged to delay adulthood. It mentions in particular, women being encouraged not to have children in their 20s which 'robs them of their focus, because having a family is a nice focus'.

I actually think I’d likely have mental health problems if I was to get pregnant. I’ve just always had this feeling that if I was to get pregnant and have a baby that the hormone changes and mental stress would actually push me into a breakdown. I struggle enough with my hormones as it is!

 

[Jane Porcupine]

There's a thread on Mumsnet at the moment about how mental health problems are exploding in the 30-35 year age group because people are being encouraged to delay adulthood. It mentions in particular, women being encouraged not to have children in their 20s which 'robs them of their focus, because having a family is a nice focus'.

 

[Blond3g1rl]

Saw this and thought of this thread

 

[shadowcat5]

Thread on reddit you folks will be interested in - someone has posted asking if others have noticed more parents bringing kids along to events.

I can't post a link but here is what she has written:

"Over the past few years I’ve noticed more and more other parents bringing their kids along to events that would normally be adult only.
I’ve been too a few dinner parties over the last few years where a couple will bring their kids along and then spend the whole time fussing over them. Celebratory dinners too for new jobs or whatever. My husbands friend brought along his two year old on a night out in Newcastle and then to watch Forest play the next day back in august. Im not talking about hosts of these events I mean guests just turning up with their kids. Saw a coupe refused entry to a wedding last summer because it was a child free wedding but the guests thought two kids wouldn’t make a difference.
This brings me on to what made me ask this question. On Sunday I’m going on a hen do, an air bnb with spa days, adults indoor play and then night events which includes raunchy games and sexy waiters. Not child friendly activities. Well, two of the party have announced they will be bring their kids along. One woman has a one year old she’s bringing and the other has a 3 and a 4 year old. What a way to ruin the two nights away!
I’m 38 so have been to loads of events over the years and no one brought their kids until the last few years!"

I have a lot of opinions (shock!) but mostly, I cannot possibly fathom why you'd want to bring a child to a hen party. I don't even want to be at a hen party!

 

[judgejohndeed]

I think it’s different just reading a thread? Sometimes I’ve gone into the pregnancy or baby ones out of morbid curiosity and always ended up reaffirming my choice not to have kids wouldn’t post though

 

[newtoyou]

I just came here to share this too

I loved these bits
From seeing everyone in my life who’s had them, the question should actually be “why the fuck do you want kids? Are you insane? It looks awful!” In a recent interview, I actually answered the question by saying “no one makes it look that fun, to be honest”.

If you’ve got kids, I can see why you want other people to join the club. It’s a bit like when my friend Ryan moved to Australia when I was 19 and spent the next three years trying to convince everyone else to go there not because it was great but because he realised he’d made a mistake and wanted strength in numbers. It was a trap!

 

[Pebbleybeach]

Where are you all apparently finding these mums?! Haha. I absolutely enjoy a bubble bath once baby is in bed and often have a hot coffee in the morning while he has breakfast. I also have an abundant supply of various hair bobbles.

Different life choices don’t mean you have to have so much hate towards people who live life differently to you. If you’re child free by choice I think that’s a great decision! It would be boring if everyone were the same. We’re all humans making the best of our lives so let’s co exist happily without all the animosity. Peace out

I don’t find them, they’re everywhere. I work with loads of them, they’re all over the internet, they write articles in the paper. I’ve literally said it’s baffling to me because my mum, the mums in my family and the mums I choose to be friends with aren’t like that, so I’m unsure why some mums choose to have ‘mummy martyr’ as a personality. Maybe you missed that part, but you don’t need to defend yourself/your hair bands to me.

I’m confused where you think the hate and animosity is?

 

[shadowcat5]

it’s just crazy.

I usually have no interest in anyone have a kid, but these two ex friends of mine from school just shocked and worried me. They were both quite cruel people, here’s hoping being a mum changed them and they don’t rub off on their kids!

not child related but it always baffles me when I see people from school who were absolute demons go into jobs that involve some kind of caring like nurses or teachers

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

I live round the corner from an ikea so I can go in the week late at night just before closing. Which is great because there’s usually no kids!

I wish restaurants did adults only times. When I was a kid (90’s/00’s) I was never taken to restaurants. That was something adults did . I went to wacky warehouse on occasion, but that was it.

 

[shadowcat5]

There’s way too many high school kids now that get dropped off at school because they can’t possibly walk.
It’s utterly ridiculous. We’ve become a lazy nation seriously.

It's funny how times have changed, when I was in high school being dropped off by your mum was the worst thing ever

 

[gossboss215]

My sister in law recently had a baby. I’m really happy for her and he is super cute but when she sends pictures of him in the family group chat she speaks as the baby it really annoys me when people do that

 

[Millais]

Your lives sound terrible.

 

[judgejohndeed]

I find it so funny how people who have kids then think 'all that free time' is a bad thing, when most of them are also always moaning that they don't have any time to themselves? Like which is it, do you think we're all bored and lonely because we don't have a sprog or are you the busiest and most tired ever because you have no time? I will be the first to say I adore having spare time. I have had a weird career/made a big career move a couple of years ago so I spent a very long time at university getting four degrees (inc a PhD). I don't miss working 7 day weeks and all evenings and holidays at all. My job now is demanding, but I have mostly complete control of my diary and I love taking days off just to do nothing. I love being lazy sometimes to be honest. The horrors! The absurdity! Imagine a whole day sitting on the sofa washing trash TV and not getting up at the crack of dawn to feed a child then run round after it all day until you're so exhausted that you don't get the evening to do anything anyway. No thanks, literally nothing appealing about that to me at all.

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

I do feel like manners have slipped and when people are having kids, they aren’t teaching them to be polite & respectful.

I remember I was on a bus a few years ago (thank god I can drive now) and I was eating a chocolate bar as I had low blood sugar (not diabetic, but I suffer with hypoglycaemia). This kid turned around and looked at me and then said to her mum “are you allowed to eat on the bus”. And the mum was like “not really no”.

she knew the kid was on about me! If that was my mum she would have gone mad at me for being rude!

 

[cc_2013]

I’ve had to leave the Elle Darby / Elle Swift threads, as she’s pregnant and EVERYONE is just discussing their own pregnancies/children and being unable to get pregnant etc etc. Like make your own threads for that please

 

[peachesandcreamz]

One of my annoyances is that around this time of year you log on to Teams and Every. Single. Day it's "poor little X has got a cold today, bless her" or "Y has a sniffly nose and an earache, so best if I stay home with him today" Like I get that they need to tell us that they'll be WFH but it's just so boring because it's every day and then you have to be like "Ah sorry to hear that, hope little X / Y gets better soon" and then you lose track of which kids are sick and which aren't Some of my colleagues' kids are sick CONSTANTLY.

Exactly, everyone's kids are sick ALL the time, and then of course they have to work from home, leaving everyone else in the office covering for them for things like phone calls and post. Why am I taking on extra work almost daily because your kid got sick? Because you undoubtedly took him to a party/the park/an activity where they went and licked windows and caught something?

I've always thought it's a bit strange how people are allowed to be off work if their child is sick. Why is it up to the employer to make allowances for that? They are hiring YOU, not your family? You chose to have this kid, shouldn't you be sorting out childcare?

 

[paulpercy666]

To be honest, my favourite is when the parents come on here to say they totally relate to us, cos they hate everyone else's kids, they only like their own. Like every parent ever, but they think they are so UnIqUe

I know, it’s such a bore. Ok hun, I hate your kids and other people’s kids

 

[rosemarina]

Or the one further up who “will definitely have kids one day” but identifies as childfree. Erm…

 

[HiyaCath!]

Hi, new poster to this thread (sorry but I am going to give you my life story).
I wanted kids when I was a kid, (in the future, when I was older obviously). That changed when I was about 20.
I've always liked kids, did voluntary work at a day nursery aged 13, and also at a special needs children daycare, then did work experience at my old Primary school at 15, I like kids, generally speaking.
But at 20ish I realised that although I like kids, not the little brats (not on them, it's their shit parents). That I did not actually want my own kids.
Some of it comes from that I have mental health issues, I wouldn't like to pass that on. (MH issues are rampant in my family) , also my MH issues would not make me a good mother, even if I did want kids.
My brother has a son and daughter, and I LOVE THEM, my beautiful nephew and niece.
But I do not want kids, not just because of MH issues, I just don't want them. It's not for me.
I have a truly wonderful husband, and a dog, and I'm happy like that. I'm a daughter, a sister, a wife, an aunt, and a dog owner! That suits me just fine.