Caroline Flack

[iknownothing1]

I think it's more that it seems she didn't throw it directly at him to hurt him, she threw it in his general direction. That in itself is dangerous (and as I said, rightly was seen as abusive behaviour) but it is different to her deliberately hitting him with an item from close proximity (ie: stood above him with a lamp).

can we all just agree that a partner hit another partner with a hard object whilst they were sleeping and the semantics of what it was and the method of hitting them is irrelevant as it is still domestic violence?
---

I find it irritating but not surprising how some tv personalities and celebs get almost canonised after their death. All their antics and behaviours brushed under the carpet after their untimely and sad demise. I get it, I honestly do. But the media didn’t make her kill herself, the media interest was there because she was the high profile presenter of the most well known dating show at the time, a show about finding love, and she courted the press as much as any contestant on the show.

Caroline Flack and Jade ‘The Racist’ Goodie’s obtaining sainthood does my head in.

Don’t say anything though, just ‘be kind’, with a phone/lamp/object to your partners head whilst they sleep and can’t defend themselves.

 

[Whitepillowcase]

I am sorry for anyone who feels so bad that they think the only solution is to take their own life, but I never liked her, she gave off bullying vibes. She was also turning into a mutton dressed as lamb. I will crucified for this no doubt but there you are, thats how she came over to me, but RIP all the same.

Dickhead comment

 

[Renegadedancer]

It’s such a sad series of events. I really feel for her poor mother but I’m not sure her anger is directed at the right people, the police were just following their procedures, the CPS had enough evidence to prosecute so they did. It seems Caroline was in a dark place with her mental health and these events all proved too much. If it’s true that her boyfriend sent pictures of the scene to others , that is unforgivable.

 

[MammaTubbs]

Lamp and/or phone, I'm sure we can agree to disagree that Lewis did not deserve an unprovoked assault whilst sleeping, whether he was directly hit by a lamp or inadvertently hit by a phone.

It's clear that whatever caused Caroline to do either, she was evidently an incredibly troubled person.

And yes it's hard to excuse what she did when up to the last moment her loved ones tried to get her help and she refused, but the reason why she probably refused help was due to her poor mental state.

 

[GrunkaLunka]

Having watched it, I am surprised they made the decision to charge. She had no previous convictions, admitted her guilt and he needed no medical treatment and dropped the charges. I’m not saying what she did wasn’t wrong at all, but I feel a caution could have sufficed in this instance. Having said that, I think she was always a big suicide risk with her mental health problems and it was an ill advised career to go into with such issues.

The decision to charge was made because she had assaulted him with a weapon whilst he was asleep, she did not make a clear admission of guilt when questioned by police, there was a visible head wound and there was enough evidence for a realistic prospect of conviction, even without the cooperation of the victim. It was a much more serious crime than the mum would have you believe. A caution isn't appropriate in such a case.

 

[GalaxyGirl70]

I sadly think that Caroline wasn't emotionally mature enough to cope with the consequences of her actions. And her path was fairly inevitable. Her Mum needs to STFU and stop blaming everyone else - if I thought for one second that one of my children was that close to the edge, I'd be glued to their sides screaming for professional help and not stopping until I had it.

 

[SnoopySnooper86]

The canonizing of her is what I find most bizzare, she was a bang average presenter most widely known for her relationships.

What exactly is her mum trying to achieve? Caroline wasn’t wronged, she unfortunately broke the law and was unable to deal with how the consequences made her feel, putting the blame on her friends is misplaced.

Perhaps misplaced anger at for not showing up herself? I struggle to see how she is going to garner more sympathy in this sad situation.

 

[Miss.Chanandler.Bong]

Probably not a popular opinion but I feel for caroline. She was obviously in a very bad place mentally and seeing those texts clearly triggered something in her, obviously she shouldn't of hit him, but for him to say to her your fucked now and ring the police hes obviously done that out or rage and anger
Does feel like everyone went on a massive witch hunt for her, because lewis himself didnt want to press charges and wanted eveyrhjng dropped.
Seems to me the police and cps then felt it was getting so much media attention they had to act harshly and charge her, which then set the press off and hunted her down until she had no choice but to end her life, all seems very sad she was very clearly a lost sole and struggled massively

Someone correct me if I’m wrong but think under UK law you can’t just change your mind and withdraw charges even if you want to. That’s not how it works

 

[BugglyWuggly]

Listened to the pod. I’m not familiar with Louise at all outside of hearing her speak but I’m not sure what more she could have done for Caroline, bar chain herself to her 24/7 and have no life of her own. She left for a few hrs on a Sunday to spend time with her own family that she hadn’t seen as she was constantly supervising Caroline, and said she felt safe leaving her in the day as it was only night time that tended to trigger Caroline. Her sister was also on her way over. I’m sure too, although she doesn’t exactly state it, that she was tired and fed up with it all and annoyed with Caroline for playing down her attempts and state of mind to the paramedics the night before, who then think she’s fine and don’t admit her. There isn’t a whole lot else she could have done, and fair play to her for not getting involved in any mud slinging towards Caroline’s mother when asked, and be like well where was she when her daughter had made several attempts, refused professional medical help and was left for her friends to deal with? Because I’m not sure I would have been able to hold my tongue.

Very true. If everything she said on the pod is true then she was an incredible friend to her and went above and beyond for Caroline and has handled the backlash from Caroline's mother in an incredibly dignified way.

 

[ahtisyourself]

Also the semantics over the lamp vs phone made me uncomfortable. Again, glossing over the fact that she launched an object at a sleeping person causing an injury, and focusing completely on the wrong point.

 

[Mrsturnerreturns]

I really don’t understand why her family didn’t get her sectioned. They can’t blame her friends for that. Thats on them.

A new thing in the article is that she had slashed her wrists. It was always inferred but I had never seen it written in black and white like that.

The more I read recently, the more I am convinced her mother is being driven by guilt and unfortunately is looking for someone else to blame. Sad

 

[GalaxyGirl70]

It's an interesting take on society that a woman gets charged with domestic violence to a partner and we're all told #bekind.

 

[femmegirly]

I realise that Caroline's mum must still be in pain, but i feel so uncomfortable with her pointing fingers at Caroline's friends.
For balance, I also realise that the mum may be vulnerable and poorly advised or exploited by the tv producers.

Totally agree. I don’t think it was entirely her friends’ responsibility to babysit her either. They had families and young children at the time and responsibilities of their own.

 

[VeniVidiVicki]

I’m not going to watch it because I think it deserves to sink without trace. It’s not a documentary, it’s an editorialised rewrite based on what Christine wants the public to think. And sharing private things which even people who didn't know Caroline think cross a line in order to do that is very low.

 

[Mrsturnerreturns]

In fairness, I think most people do feel for her.

She needed an intervention. Simple as. Her mother has documented that she had been told she had bipolar, multiple suicide attempts since being a young girl, repeated self harm , massive periods of instability. I wouldn’t care how old my child was, if I was at a point where I was actually fearing for their life constantly, I would move heaven and earth to get them the m/h treatment they needed. So has all this now got an element of guilt attached to her mother’s actions. Who knows? But if it was me, I know if I had sat back and my child was no longer here - I would be beside myself.

 

[Boogs]

I wonder if all this has guilt at the root of it. Her mum seems so desperate to blame someone for what happened to Caroline rather than looking at Caroline’s own actions and decisions and what role she could have played. Babying Caroline certainly did not equip her with the emotional maturity needed to regulate her emotions and she didn’t seem to have any resilience. If 40 year old Lewis had woken up 27 year old Caroline by smacking her in the head with something resulting in extensive bleeding you can bet that her mum would be wanting him charged. It’s a sad outcome and I am sure the media could have handled things differently but ultimately everything that happened was a result of Caroline’s actions and choices.

 

[Marshallmum1982]

Interesting how in the article they say it was Caroline's twin who found her and have completely airbrushed Lou and her dad out of the situation when that poor man dealt with Caroline's body first and foremost.

 

[GrunkaLunka]

She found text and threw his phone at him. He made a calculation, knowing how vulnerable she was and told her, 'you're fucked', rang the police and sent humiliating photos of the scene of her self harming to whoever. No doubt she was hard work, but did she have ANYONE who had her best interests at heart in her life other than family?
Despite it all, she still wanted to be with him. She would accept any old shit, she thought so little of herself. Didn't think she was good enough for anything, not even life.
And even in death, all the gory details are printed for no good reason at all. She'd have been so embarrassed.

She didn't "find a text" though did she? She was going through his phone, while he was asleep. This isn't reasonable behaviour, his phone is private.

She hit him over the head with something, hard enough to leave him with a bleeding wound. Hit him over the head while he was sleeping.

He reported a crime. The quoted text in bold makes me feel sick. He phoned the police and reported that he'd been beaten, whilst sleeping.

She might have been vulnerable but that's not his responsibility and doesn't mean she's above the law. She attacked him, and he reported her. Stop blaming the victim for actions taken by the perpetrator.

 

[Bobbiewilson]

If someone is set on ending their life there is nothing anyone can do to stop them. You can’t physically be with someone 24/7 no matter how hard you try and when this person is pushing you away, it’s an impossible situation. If it wasn’t that time, it would have been another. It’s utterly heartbreaking but Caroline and Caroline only caused her death. There are things which may have strongly contributed, but in the end she made the decision to end her life.

I sympathise with her family and friends and understand their grief is causing them to try and find someone to blame. They saw Caroline as a young girl not a troubled 40 year old woman. I don’t think they truly Feel the paramedics failed I just think they are angry and still in early stage of grief

 

[truffletrot]

BIB: tbh, I think that Mum needs to understand that no one could have saved her. Even if she’d been there herself, it’s highly unlikely she would have been able to do anything differently. C was obviously so determined — waiting until she was alone, etc — her Mum would have had to have literally provided 24/7 watch alone. There’s a reason nursing staff work in shifts: no one can do that alone. Until she realises that, though, I’m afraid she won’t find peace and will continue to put “blame” at the feet of people who are alive.

This..


also, in the documentary Caroline’s suicide attempts went back to her late teens/early twenties. She took pills and ended up in a&e after a few break ups and her sister said she was always sort of prepared for this to happen

I know Caroline was an adult and didn’t want to talk at all openly about her mental health, but it wasn’t just an “out of the blue” suicide so her mum can’t really blame her friends when she knew about the past attempts