I don't think the comparison between ant and CF can be used either. Whilst it was despicable and it irks me when I see Ant on family tv shows the public view that as a mistake (of his own making) rather than violence. Kirsty Gallagher didn't crash but was pissed driving to collect her kids at 11am and (whilst she wasn't as famous as CF) the media attention was minimal and hasn't completely ended her career. https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/4386173/kirsty-gallacher-drink-driving-ban-latest-stress-marriage/
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I never see Kirsty on TV anymore though I am not really sure what she is doing, I imagined she would be covering for Lorrainne Kelly or on the Jeremy Kyly show but I never see her on mainstream TV.
I agree. I think the mother is making a fool of herself, it’s understandable that she is upset about her daughters death but the police are not to blame. Her daughter made some poor, poor, decisions and was about to face the repercussions and could not handle the consequences of her actions. The police did what was needed, violent people should be held accountable and there really are no excuses.
Caroline was privileged enough to have the ability to seek top class medical treatment for her issues but instead chose fame, drink and drugs and that’s the unfortunate reality.
Hindsight is 20:20 and I’m sure her mother wishes she would have forced her daughter to seek treatment but Caroline was an adult woman making stupid decisions and faced her fate.
Still
I wonder if being 3 times over the limit at 11am was due to caning it the night before - or pouring vodka on her cornflakes at breakfast time? That's an awful lot of booze.
I'm actually shocked by the standard at which people are holding a grieving mother. Jesus. Made a fool of herself? 
I heard that Sky didn't renew KG's contract due to 2 episodes of drunkeness, firstly she was slurring on air just before Christmas about 4 years ago and then the drink driving incident. So she probably was punished for her actions, what really annoys me about her is her whiny attitude that her divorce is to be blamed for everything. SHE chose to leave her husband and end the marriage.
Whilst I accept CF’s mother is grieving, no one seems to stop and think about the poor PC who’s being told she’s to blame. She’s human too and this will no doubt play on her mind for the rest of her life.
I think the issue was also that the men she went for didn’t seem to want to settle down or be monogamous and that hurt her. Not to be an armchair psychologist but if she was insecure (and the very sad excerpts from her autobiography that someone shared suggest she was) then seeking to accomplish a successful career and lifestyle that isn’t available to most and bagging an attractive guy 10+ years younger than you would be ways for an insecure person to self-validate, even subconsciously.
I know, Caroline's mother sounds like she just blames everyone and cannot think straight I hope she sees things differently after she has had time to grieve properly
This is my concern. A policewoman is a professional who cannot release her emotions publicly like Caroline’s mum but most people with any sensitivity and compassion would be deeply moved and distressed at being accused of pretty much single-handedly driving a person’s suicide. The policewoman may be a mother too, she may have mental health problems herself or she may have had family members/friends who have committed suicide - there could be all kinds of trigger points that we don’t know about because the policewoman is by profession a private person. Now the policewoman has to face her colleagues, family, friends and neighbours because her name has been all over the media. It just didn’t sit comfortably with me that Caroline’s death inspired a Be Kind and anti-bullying sentiment and then the policewoman was essentially bullied and treated with zero kindness at the inquest when she was following guidelines and professional judgement and had no reason to want to punish Caroline as was suggested. I realise grieving will obviously affect your rational thinking but Caroline’s mum had time to prepare and compose herself for the inquest and other (more effective) opportunities to seek answers.
This is why suicide is just so awful though. No answers, just questions. Why was it this particular moment in her life where she couldn’t go on? It sounds like she had suffered for years and so was it just the fact that it had never been properly dealt with or managed that meant it had just got worse? I find the whole anti bullying social media be kind thing strange. Obviously everyone is anti bullying, but why oh why didn’t her management take her somewhere away form phones and social media for a good couple of months? I’m sure she had bail conditions but this could have been accounted for. A couple of months in the priory to try to get better or at least understand her illness a bit better. I saw on one of her friends social media they posted about loyalty and how Caroline deserved better so maybe what has come out at the inquest has shocked those close to her too with regards to the photo sharing. It all just seemed inevitable sadly. When something isn’t tackled head on when the problem arises (mental health wise) then from experience it only gets worse. She always seemed so ‘happy’ from her friends posts. Certain people are there when everything is great but when things get tough it shows people’s true colours.
Totally agree about her management/those close to her encouraging her to close her social media accounts and not read media reports. She was said to have routinely compulsively scrolled through horrible media stories and her Twitter feed full of insults - I seem to remember Olly Murs saying she spent her X Factor breaks scrolling through Twitter to see the public reaction to her - and it was obviously a huge trigger for her, a serious source of pain for her. I know you can’t force somebody to do something against their will but her friends are so enmeshed with social
media (I’m thinking particularly of Lou and the pictures from the wake, as well as the pictures she took of them a day or two before Caroline’s death, pouting in a mirror) I can’t imagine they’d really push for it.
I agree it is ironic, sad and pretty disturbing that Caroline’s friends and family were so quick to latch onto the Be Kind thing but that only extends others apparently.
To tell someone that they were the cause of someone committing suicide is so low and imo just as bad as anything Caroline flack went through.
I’m not sure I buy the theory that they wouldn’t have prosecuted an “ordinary” person. What does the prosecuting officer have to gain by prosecuting Caroline vs someone else not in the public eye in the same situation?
To tell someone that they were the cause of someone committing suicide is so low and imo just as bad as anything Caroline flack went through.
I’m not sure I buy the theory that they wouldn’t have prosecuted an “ordinary” person. What does the prosecuting officer have to gain by prosecuting Caroline vs someone else not in the public eye in the same situation?
Even with the inquest details, we still dont know all the details. All the conversations. Inquests are part of the job for the police. It obviously wouldnt be pleasant to be shouted at or blamed for a death, but the officers responses/decisions read quite assured and confident. It was also a build up to the day that the people involved were all together; emotions were always going to be running wild.
They would have pursued prosecution. I work in criminal law and I have seen so many times people report something to the police, usually when pissed, then desperately try to back pedal when they realise how seriously the police take domestic abuse. Calling the police triggers them having to go through the process as is their duty. Lewis called the police. And it is Abh rather than common assault due to the fact that he was injured. Abh is rarely cautionable but common assault is, but not in a domestic context. Again giving a new story at the police station did her no favours. However she could have taken herself off, no phone no social media, away from London and take two or three months to calm her life down. I suppose the whole social media/approval seeking this is addictive but it’s so toxic. With serious mh issues sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind and ‘force’ them. I had to do it with a family member who now thanks us so much for being there and acting so quickly, though at the time they said they hated me.
This might be unpopular, but I hate the whole 'be kind' 'movement'. It seems to have been hijacked by Z listers who scream it every time someone happens to point out that posting a trillion filtered bikini shots every day is perhaps a bit narcissistic. Of course we should all be kind by default but mainly the ones screaming it the loudest are the ones LEAST likely to be practicing what they preach.
I think it’s a blessing that this country takes domestic violence etc so seriously and don’t allow the case to be dropped by the accused - so many people have died or gone on to suffer more from dropping cases to protect the abuser. I don’t think they would treat her any differently, she made a massive mistake and had no one to blame and the family shouldn’t blame anyone for her awful and tragic death. I know they’re upset and looking for someone to blame but this system is in place to protect people wether she hurt Lewis or not and if she didn’t and it was a misunderstanding then she would of been fine at her court case.
I don’t understand what her family wanted from the CPS etc, by saying she was suicidal etc, they could not drop the case when she may of abused someone. If that was the case thousands if criminals would be free!
I don’t understand what her family wanted from the CPS etc, by saying she was suicidal etc, they could not drop the case when she may of abused someone. If that was the case thousands if criminals would be free!
I think the family suggested that Caroline was made an example of and the police had pushed for it because they disliked her. I think the coroner suggested that the police ‘didn’t like’ Caroline in some way so it wasn’t a stand-alone opinion.
Conversely the police said a caution wasn’t appropriate because Caroline hadn’t accepted responsibility for the act, admitting it at the scene and then downplaying it when questioned as a lover’s tiff and accidental injury. I recall at the time it was also reported that Caroline had tipped over a table in the presence of the police.
Who was it that posted about loyalty and Caroline derseving better?
No one can judge someone for acting the way they do at a time like that.
I know from my own experience at the hands of an abuser ( I'm not saying Caroline was) you dont really think you go into shock.
My ex partner strangled, kicked me and then split my forehead open by head butting me! But at the time i was more concerned about him as he said he was going to self harm. He had snapped my phone in half so i phoned his parents for some stupid reason as I used his phone.
We could all say we wish we did different, didnt phone someone etc but the truth is at times of panic we do just that.
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