Caroline Flack

[Dirty Joan]

I am struggling with this it's on my mind all the time and I feel like I can't just leave it alone. I don't know why. Anyone else feel very connected to the situation? I don't want to make this about me but I have mental health issues and have attempted suicide before so I get that it's partly triggering (hate that word) for me to be hearing about it alot. Also a deep sadness for Caroline and her family/friends although I feel like I am slowly seeing the side that some of you do. That we can't just all start blaming cps police and the charges against her. It's difficult though because I know what it's like to feel that way of course my first reaction is to empathise with her but now I do think of people I know who have went though DV and imagine if that was the person who hurt them being celebrated. Also people say it doesn't matter about the truth now but I've heard so many stories from the blood was hers and she was in the middle of a mental health episode and he called police for her own safety and in her anger threw it am him to her attacking him while asleep and which is very different although not defending either I think the facts are important still.

When I first heard the news I did go down the #BeKind pictures and posts and I now see plenty people getting #BeKind tattoos, writing poems about the situation (as someone who writes I have done this), drawing Caroline, making their own tribute videos and own fundraising events in her name. I know people think these influencers are wrong for what they are doing as it seems for likes/exposure but what about the general public? Should they be doing all this or do you all think it's too much?

I think it’s all too much but I think people find suicide very emotionally triggering.

The wave of emotional hysteria is being well and truly ridden right now, but in time people will gain more clarity about the situation and have more perspective.

That’s why no “laws” should be made off the back of emotional hysteria. It’s not good practice.

 

[minimazoo]

If those sources (!!) and the Sun (debateable!) are to be trusted, that’s truly awful. I thought she’d misinterpreted his texts with an older tennis client as being something more, but maybe there was a lot more to this than her MH and trolling in that case. I agree that whatever happened, having her life subjected to yet more scrutiny in court must have left her feeling like she had nowhere else to turn and only one option. So very sad.

Well, the messages in that article are after the arrest....so they weren't anything to do with the messages she saw that night. But yes, 'The Sun' as a source, so who knows

Obviously we can't know if he ever did message women but I'm leaning on the view that she was paranoid about him messaging other women, on a holiday in October last year ( ibiza) she was photographed showing a phone to him and arguing, she was said to be jealous and jumped to conclusions in 2 other relationships, so there's a pattern. we're getting on to at least 3 partners she has accused of cheating and dumped and then got back together with etc.

Also if someone had been attacked by a partner, it's completely understandable they wanted to move on. If it was a woman most people would be saying 'dump him'. So telling the Sun about the messages could be an attempt to make him look bad for actually trying to do something healthy?

 

[Eat your greens]

I wasn’t listening properly as I was distracted but they were just reporting on it at Sky News. I thought they said Danny said she called him on the Friday evening before she died and she also left voice mail telling him they shared so much . Did I hear correctly?

He said that she decided to call him when she was in her last moments, when she was with her two best friends, so it sounds like that was on the Friday evening.

He also said that he has voice notes that he’ll share in a few weeks - I hope that he doesn’t. I can’t help thinking that is something her family should have a say over, it’s yet more scrutiny of private moments, even if done with the best of intentions and is feeding the media frenzy once again/negates the message he’s conveying in today’s video.

 

[Dirty Joan]

In fairness even if she did find anything suspect on his phone that doesn’t give her the right to assault him. Nothing justifies that kind of behaviour she displayed that night. If you’re suspicious, confront him like an adult and talk to him. Don’t wait until he’s asleep to root through his belongings and then, without as much as an explanation, batter him over the head because you read too much into what you found.

 

[AmberSpyglass]

Nicola McClean, Stephanie Davis et al really don’t strike me as being the sort of women CF would have wished to have associated with her. Because let’s be honest - they’re vile pond life.

Caroline appeared to be mates with Dawn Porter , Gizzi Erkskine and other creative media types, not NM or SDavies.

 

[Eat your greens]

Well, the messages in that article are after the arrest....so they weren't anything to do with the messages she saw that night. But yes, 'The Sun' as a source, so who knows

Obviously we can't know if he ever did message women but I'm leaning on the view that she was paranoid about him messaging other women, on a holiday in October last year ( ibiza) she was photographed showing a phone to him and arguing, she was said to be jealous and jumped to conclusions in 2 other relationships, so there's a pattern. we're getting on to at least 3 partners she has accused of cheating and dumped and then got back together with etc.

Also if someone had been attacked by a partner, it's completely understandable they wanted to move on. If it was a woman most people would be saying 'dump him'. So telling the Sun about the messages could be an attempt to make him look bad for actually trying to do something healthy?

Sorry, I completely missed the timing of the messages you mentioned.

It’s sad that the truth of this situation will never be revealed in court and will always be conjecture, with both of them being maligned in some way.

 

[Spammingyourhighway]

In fairness even if she did find anything suspect on his phone that doesn’t give her the right to assault him. Nothing justifies that kind of behaviour she displayed that night. If you’re suspicious, confront him like an adult and talk to him. Don’t wait until he’s asleep to root through his belongings and then, without as much as an explanation, batter him over the head because you read too much into what you found.

Now’s not the time to have the moral high ground

 

[Digitalgeisha]

I’m wondering, will the truth of that night come out in her inquest? As it is relevant to the lead up to her death?

 

[Dirty Joan]

Now’s not the time to have the moral high ground

I’m not taking any moral high ground. I’m taking a very measured stance and a balanced approach in what seems to be a tidal wave of hysteria.

If you feel like me being disgusted at domestic battery is “taking the moral high ground”, then so be it

 

[Pennypennypenny]

He said that she decided to call him when she was in her last moments, when she was with her two best friends, so it sounds like that was on the Friday evening.

He also said that he has voice notes that he’ll share in a few weeks - I hope that he doesn’t. I can’t help thinking that is something her family should have a say over, it’s yet more scrutiny of private moments, even if done with the best of intentions and is feeding the media frenzy once again/negates the message he’s conveying in today’s video.

Thank you.

 

[Susiew73]

I thought this too.

Wasn’t it her neck she was cutting?

 

[GrunkaLunka]

Now’s not the time to have the moral high ground

I just see Dirty Joan saying that there is no excuse for violence. Not sure how that is the moral high ground, but if that's what you want to call it and then now is EXACTLY the time for moral high ground. There is a man with a head wound, potentially a victim and it starts to smell like victim blaming when people say that he has upset CF by texting other women.

 

[Prodcon21]

Now’s not the time to have the moral high ground

Sounds like sound reasoning to me - nothing to do with the moral high ground

 

[Dirty Joan]

Just watched Danny C’s video. Out of all of the people coming out of the woodwork I feel like he is the most genuine. He seems genuinely distraught. That can’t have been easy for him to do. He also didn’t get into the blame game that so many others have taken it upon themselves to do.

 

[Mrsturnerreturns]

Just watched Danny C’s video. Out of all of the people coming out of the woodwork I feel like he is the most genuine. He seems genuinely distraught. That can’t have been easy for him to do. He also didn’t get into the blame game that so many others have taken it upon themselves to do.

Dawn Porter, Officer Rhodes and Olly Murs also seem completely distraught.

 

[Dirty Joan]

Dawn Porter, Officer Rhodes and Olly Murs also seem completely distraught.

Oh right I don’t follow any of them lol

 

[Sinkingship]

I don’t think it’s fair to say she was too proud to ever say she struggled. She was open about her depression, did interviews about it and posted Instagram posts referring to it

That’s not the same. I talk about depression and anxiety because it’s socially acceptable to have those as ‘mental health’ people sympathise. I don’t tell them even a fraction of what I’ve actually been through. Hospitals. Screaming. Rooms full of blood that’s mine and an angry boyfriend being shouted at too, suicidal thoughts almost daily and an urge to run away and hide from everyone. If you asked most people who know me they’d say I’m quite a laugh, outgoing and friendly. Maybe add a sure she had a few struggles but really she’s great and happy.
happy is the last thing I feel most of the time but I need to keep my job so I smile.

 

[Suzesnooze]

Dawn Porter, Officer Rhodes and Olly Murs also seem completely distraught.

I know it's not that relevant but I've noticed Dawn has gained nearly 10K followers since she first did a tribute to Caroline and has continued to post something about her nearly every day since. I wonder if all those good friends posting about it that see their following increase feel a bit uncomfortable that they're gaining so many new followers because of their friend dying?

 

[Spammingyourhighway]

It must be hard when you’re always seen as the fun one and the person who provides the laughs to then have your hidden secret of self harm etc shown in court, and everyone you know seeing you in a different way and not knowing whether people will be turned off by you and reject you

 

[Pennypennypenny]

Just watched Danny C’s video. Out of all of the people coming out of the woodwork I feel like he is the most genuine. He seems genuinely distraught. That can’t have been easy for him to do. He also didn’t get into the blame game that so many others have taken it upon themselves to do.

I also think out of all the bull coming out on social media about the press, twitter etc were to blame I believe he knows what he’s talking about when he says embarrassment and shame killed her . of course we will never know and it’s presumptuous of me to say that but I do feel it’s nearer the mark and I feel he knew that side of her.