Bryony Farmer #2 A baby is for life, not just before/after Christmas

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The complex she has about the ‘’workload of motherhood’’ is thoroughly bizarre. We all know she had no responsibilities, her only job is filming herself talk tit, she has free childcare, a small flat she doesn’t leave, an easy baby etc.

But what bothers me most is how she is co-opting what is a genuine feminist concern of unequal labour distribution, mainly for working women in relationships with men. That has already been flattened into Instagram posts and Bryony looks at them and thinks ‘’Yep. That’s me. Oppressed for having to do dishes’’ holding the baby she paid for in the London flat her parents own.

Also the recent post saying‘’loving them is easy, only the workload is hard’’ is a wildly disingenuous dichotomy I cba to even unpack. But yes Bryony, you’re solely responsible for the physical care of the child you paid money to be inseminated with. I don’t know why that would need to be said.
 
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Childfree people cook food, wash dishes and do laundry too. With a baby it's really not much extra. She said she was BLW, so he's eating the same food as her. An extra load of laundry and emptying a nappy pail a few times a week is nothing.

She's not trying to get an infant, preschooler and child to and from nursery and school and juggling it all around full time work. She doesn't even have a garden or pets. Her parents help with everything. What is she actually complaining about?
 
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I never actually addressed the whatabout of someone deciding to use sperm and egg donations because having their own genetic child would result in major disabilities, as you well know.
I was merely prioritising children's rights and not adult rights.
(The rights of the child to have his or her biological father and mother in his or her life instead of the adults perceived rights or urge to have children). I am sorry this offended you. No offence intended . There is always adoption( mostly from children born in other countries)

Also the world is overpopulated. Not having children should be normalised more.
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With donor sperm, a child will have numerous half brothers and sisters with different women, and people do not find this disturbing?

Granted, no one knows much about him,but the guy who donated sperm to Bryony is very likely to be a creep,narcissistic and hugely egotistical.

I guess people think that adult wants are more important than the fundamental rights of the child(including not to be brought into the world in many instances). Or at least the popular view is adult wants are more important. than the rights of the child.
I can't believe you're supporting international adoption here? What is wrong with you? On what planet is picking a child up out of their home culture and placing them in your own less problematic than using some frozen sperm?

There are far more problems with adoption vis-à-vis child rights than there are with donor eggs and sperm. The argument that the children did not consent to be here is complete rubbish, given that no child, however conceived, whether it be IVF, Sperm Donation, or in the hayloft of the hoe-down consented to be here.
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I've never followed Bryony too closely, and just wanted to know what her status is with her pad business? Is she officially no longer involved with it, or has she just taken time or for materinty leave or what?
 
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I can't believe you're supporting international adoption here? What is wrong with you? On what planet is picking a child up out of their home culture and placing them in your own less problematic than using some frozen sperm?

There are far more problems with adoption vis-à-vis child rights than there are with donor eggs and sperm. The argument that the children did not consent to be here is complete rubbish, given that no child, however conceived, whether it be IVF, Sperm Donation, or in the hayloft of the hoe-down consented to be here.
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I've never followed Bryony too closely, and just wanted to know what her status is with her pad business? Is she officially no longer involved with it, or has she just taken time or for materinty leave or what?
Not my original post, but both international adoption and anonymous donor conception are very controversial and I don’t morally agree with either - but the reality is they’re both legal and relatively common ways people have families.

When you look at the stats both groups (internationally adopted and donor conceived adults) have very high rates of physiological distress and confusion about their identity. Yes a person has a right to directly know and experience their cultural heritage which is denied through some adoptions, but they also have a right to know their genetic, medical and paternal family heritage which is denied in anonymous sperm donor conception.

I find your reaction totally disproportionate.
 
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I've never followed Bryony too closely, and just wanted to know what her status is with her pad business? Is she officially no longer involved with it, or has she just taken time or for materinty leave or what?
It's no longer operational. Her 'job' is her social media presence now ie YouTube videos and Instagram posts. Topped up with universal credit.

I know the general consensus here is that her parents fund her lifestyle. But surely they’re either retired or retiring soon? She let slip in a recent video that her car was bought with the junior isa that her parent set up for her. They defo own her flat. will they just keep funding her forever?
Apparently the school she went to is one of the most expensive in the country so I suspect she'll do pretty well through inheritance. Other than the holidays she does seem to live quite frugally tbh so she's probably set for life.

Maybe it's because I'm not in that 'universe' of having babies and toddlers anymore but that weaning poem, among other posts/stories of hers just made me roll my eyes at how she manages to put a negative and resentful spin on absolutely everything. I thought she wanted this life? Maybe now she's realising why most people don't choose to go into parenthood alone, though she'll never admit it and will probably have another 😬
 
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There's a lot to unpack here, but this tells me it isn't even worth trying to discuss how problematic and offensive your comments are.
It isn,t worth taking your comment seriously as clearly you appear to think children's fundamental rights and needs for a financially and mentally stable mother and a father (preferably their genetic parents if possible) are "problematic and offensive" and in its place you falsely believe that adults misperceived rights to have children is important.

There is no such thing as adults fundamental rights to have children. There are no special adults who have the right to have children more than other adults .

Adoption again fulfils children's needs and rights.

Thats all there is to "unpack".
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Previous poster clearly has a very specific ethical view against assisted reproduction - @Itsmeagainat you may be interested in the work of Katy Faust?

It’s completely valid but I don’t entirely agree with your framing and neither do most on this thread clearly. It would be a shame to derail and discourage discussion because people are upset.
Katy Faust did not come up the basic principles I outlined-whoever she is. I do not think I would find her an interesting person. There has been widespread knowledge of the psychological damage and distress experienced by children who were the product of extramarital affairs, long before "sperm donation" was in existence. There are lots of different types of people who object to sperm donation, egg donation and surrogacy, it isn,t confined to people of her type. Ms Faust did not back up her statements with sources., although it would appear to be "completely valid."
The following sample survey shows a significant number of adult people who were donor conceived experienced psychological distress when they found out they were donor conceived.

Its not likely that donor conceived children who always knew that they were donor conceived all of their lives will not be distressed once they become adults and understand what being donor conceived means. A significant number of people who come from married parents which that they had never been brought into existence , so somehow it is thought that people who come from donor conception/ science experiment would not be or never be distressed/psychologically harmed by it??!!

There is no such thing as adult rights over children's instinctual needs and rights.

This is also discussion.
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I can't believe you're supporting international adoption here? What is wrong with you? On what planet is picking a child up out of their home culture and placing them in your own less problematic than using some frozen sperm?

There are far more problems with adoption vis-à-vis child rights than there are with donor eggs and sperm. The argument that the children did not consent to be here is complete rubbish, given that no child, however conceived, whether it be IVF, Sperm Donation, or in the hayloft of the hoe-down consented to be here.
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I've never followed Bryony too closely, and just wanted to know what her status is with her pad business? Is she officially no longer involved with it, or has she just taken time or for materinty leave or what?
I can't believe you're supporting international adoption here? What is wrong with you? On what planet is picking a child up out of their home culture and placing them in your own less problematic than using some frozen sperm?

There are far more problems with adoption vis-à-vis child rights than there are with donor eggs and sperm. The argument that the children did not consent to be here is complete rubbish, given that no child, however conceived, whether it be IVF, Sperm Donation, or in the hayloft of the hoe-down consented to be here.
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I've never followed Bryony too closely, and just wanted to know what her status is with her pad business? Is she officially no longer involved with it, or has she just taken time or for materinty leave or what?
In no way did I condone adoption where the natural mother or both natural parents did not choose or consent to give their child up for adoption. The reason why I mentioned international adoption is because there is a shortage of children in Britain available for adoption. "picking a child up out of their home and culture" . People of different races and ethnicities share British culture whether you like it or not-its 2023. No culture is more important than being rescued from chronic poverty. Adoption is not problematic because it is about the children's rights and needs for a mother and father , not adults wanting to have their own bloodline.

The fact that no one consented to exist does not in any way justify the use of donor eggs and sperm or women being exploited for surrogacy. In fact it bolsters the argument against donor eggs and sperm and a lot of surrogacy, because plenty of people -even from married parents of a father and mother, for a variety of reasons-wish that they did not exist. So if lots of people who knew both their biological parents wold rather not have existed, the chances of donoir conceived people resenting their existence and biological and non-biological parent is far likely to be much higher and that is the reality. It is your type of thinking "every adult has the right to have a child"that leads to a situation like Bryony.

Bryony does not do her pad business anymore and thinks that she can make enough money off youtube as far as I know and from what other people have said.

Your comments about adoption are bigoted . Vast amount of people in society and adoptees themselves see no problem with international adoption.
 
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I can't believe you're supporting international adoption here? What is wrong with you? On what planet is picking a child up out of their home culture and placing them in your own less problematic than using some frozen sperm?

There are far more problems with adoption vis-à-vis child rights than there are with donor eggs and sperm. The argument that the children did not consent to be here is complete rubbish, given that no child, however conceived, whether it be IVF, Sperm Donation, or in the hayloft of the hoe-down consented to be here.
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I've never followed Bryony too closely, and just wanted to know what her status is with her pad business? Is she officially no longer involved with it, or has she just taken time or for materinty leave or what?
With adoption prospective adoptive parents are carefully vetted, unlike sperm donations we see with Bryony,so that is another reason why it is proper, in comparison to sperm donation ,egg donation and surrogacy. I do not approve of selling babies internationally if that is what you would consider to be adoption too.
 
Katy Faust did not come up the basic principles I outlined-whoever she is. I do not think I would find her an interesting person. There has been widespread knowledge of the psychological damage and distress experienced by children who were the product of extramarital affairs, long before "sperm donation" was in existence. There are lots of different types of people who object to sperm donation, egg donation and surrogacy, it isn,t confined to people of her type. Ms Faust did not back up her statements with sources., although it would appear to be "completely valid."
The following sample survey shows a significant number of adult people who were donor conceived experienced psychological distress when they found out they were donor conceived.
Its not likely that donor conceived children who always knew that they were donor conceived all of their lives will not be distressed once they become adults and understand what being donor conceived means. A significant number of people who come from married parents which that they had never been brought into existence , so somehow it is thought that people who come from donor conception/ science experiment would not be or never be distressed/psychologically harmed by it??!!

There is no such thing as adult rights over children's instinctual needs and rights.

This is also discussion.
I've said many times on this thread I have major ethical concerns about the type of anonymous sperm donation Bryony has used. I'm very familiar with all the research on this including the study you posted - we do not have majorly opposing views. I mentioned Katy Faust because her stance is very similar to yours, and she is an intellectual who has written professionally about your argument. I wasn't being malicious or backhanded. I also defended your position in my last post. But it's clearly not worth trying to engage with you.
 
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It isn,t worth taking your comment seriously as clearly you appear to think children's fundamental rights and needs for a financially and mentally stable mother and a father (preferably their genetic parents if possible) are "problematic and offensive" and in its place you falsely believe that adults misperceived rights to have children is important.

There is no such thing as adults fundamental rights to have children. There are no special adults who have the right to have children more than other adults .

Adoption again fulfils children's needs and rights.

Thats all there is to "unpack".
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Katy Faust did not come up the basic principles I outlined-whoever she is. I do not think I would find her an interesting person. There has been widespread knowledge of the psychological damage and distress experienced by children who were the product of extramarital affairs, long before "sperm donation" was in existence. There are lots of different types of people who object to sperm donation, egg donation and surrogacy, it isn,t confined to people of her type. Ms Faust did not back up her statements with sources., although it would appear to be "completely valid."
The following sample survey shows a significant number of adult people who were donor conceived experienced psychological distress when they found out they were donor conceived.

Its not likely that donor conceived children who always knew that they were donor conceived all of their lives will not be distressed once they become adults and understand what being donor conceived means. A significant number of people who come from married parents which that they had never been brought into existence , so somehow it is thought that people who come from donor conception/ science experiment would not be or never be distressed/psychologically harmed by it??!!

There is no such thing as adult rights over children's instinctual needs and rights.

This is also discussion.
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In no way did I condone adoption where the natural mother or both natural parents did not choose or consent to give their child up for adoption. The reason why I mentioned international adoption is because there is a shortage of children in Britain available for adoption. "picking a child up out of their home and culture" . People of different races and ethnicities share British culture whether you like it or not-its 2023. No culture is more important than being rescued from chronic poverty. Adoption is not problematic because it is about the children's rights and needs for a mother and father , not adults wanting to have their own bloodline.

The fact that no one consented to exist does not in any way justify the use of donor eggs and sperm or women being exploited for surrogacy. In fact it bolsters the argument against donor eggs and sperm and a lot of surrogacy, because plenty of people -even from married parents of a father and mother, for a variety of reasons-wish that they did not exist. So if lots of people who knew both their biological parents wold rather not have existed, the chances of donoir conceived people resenting their existence and biological and non-biological parent is far likely to be much higher and that is the reality. It is your type of thinking "every adult has the right to have a child"that leads to a situation like Bryony.

Bryony does not do her pad business anymore and thinks that she can make enough money off youtube as far as I know and from what other people have said.

Your comments about adoption are bigoted . Vast amount of people in society and adoptees themselves see no problem with international adoption.
In my opinion you can't generalise like this.
 
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It's no longer operational. Her 'job' is her social media presence now ie YouTube videos and Instagram posts. Topped up with universal credit.
Oh that is a shame! I quite liked them. It was Bryony who got me onto reusable pads, and I am still using the ones I bought back in 2015. Has she said why she shuttered it? Mustn't have been that profitable, tbh. Most of these sorts of businesses are either run by SATMs who can get by without huge profits or larger businesses that have volume on their side.
 
Oh that is a shame! I quite liked them. It was Bryony who got me onto reusable pads, and I am still using the ones I bought back in 2015. Has she said why she shuttered it? Mustn't have been that profitable, tbh. Most of these sorts of businesses are either run by SATMs who can get by without huge profits or larger businesses that have volume on their side.
She hasn't said but I suspect it's not viable anymore as reusable menstrual products are pretty mainstream now so it's not the niche market it once was.
 
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So obvious she heard the term ‘’neoliberal economy’’ for the first time in her life about an hour before making that video 😅
 
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I find this last paragraph of her new post quite sinister. I think she is genuinely dreading Oryn growing up because she fears him as an individual person and not just an object / special interest / part of herself. I especially think it’s made worse by his gender.

Her whole rationale for having kids was that she loves babies and very young children, she’s been talking publicly about it for literally a decade. She never cared about having children to raise whole people, have lifelong relationships. And ofc it’s always different with your own kids but it is relevant that has NO social skills or real bonds. Not even the bare minimum of having had a relationship (or even sexual encounter) to get pregnant in the first place. Her relationship with her mum is majorly dependant, with her dad it seems emotionally lacking (texting to say she was pregnant lol). I don’t think she can imagine herself having a bond with a child beyond 5/6/7? Never mind a teenage boy.

I think she still hates that he is male. I don’t believe that was just a ‘’mental health blip’’ gender reveal infanticide meltdown. I think it’s a deep fear and resentment that is hidden temporarily because she’s on a high about having the baby she wanted to cloth nappy, blw, be a yummy mummy influencer perpetual lady of leisure etc.
 
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She does seem to have a weird obsession with the US. She posted a story with a US News article (I can't remember what it was about but it was something negative) and said "are y'all ok over there". I've never heard anyone British say y'all, and definitely never heard her say it in her videos. It was just such a random thing to post, idk maybe she's looking for engagement.
I think because the USA has such a large population so it helps with the youtube views. Which is fine, until like Russell Brand, they get involved in those USA extremist religious channels that whine on against women, and call everything leftie as an insult, that's actually only about things really promoted to the rest of the world by the USA, such as TV shows for trans children and melting pot societies. While all actual leftie countries such as most in north Europe and Scandinavia promote are not getting into debt with credit cards and free health care.
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I thought I would look up her channel again after a long while and saw lots of baby videos. Did she say why she's not interested in having a baby with a man who stays in the baby's life? Or is she not into men? If she has so many health conditions, even if they're psychological, what does she think is going to happen to the child if she can't look after it?
I saw a video saying pads after 10 years and didn't want to click on it lol.
 
Boring new video - she reveals she has a regular paid cleaner though lmao. It gets funnier.
 
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I like how her only advice for someone on juggling motherhood was to throw money at the problem - have a cleaner, pay for a meal prep service, buy more expensive baby food pouches. Oh, and sit your baby in front of cbeebies on days can’t be bothered with them…

I can’t afford things like cleaners and meal prep on a full time salary, but Bryony can on universal credit - whilst complaining the government doesn’t see motherhood as a paid role. If you want to make the argument you should get paid to parent the child you bought, you should at least be doing the work yourself like the majority of the country does. She seems to want to be a lady of leisure with hired help and a nanny, but wants the government to fund it instead of a rich husband.
 
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He's only 8 months, sleeps the majority of the night and several naps, and already a matter of weeks into weaning she can't make him food or clean a little flat. She's able-bodied and has hours every day to get things done. She couldn't cope with pregnancy and is really struggling with motherhood to the point she needs to use a nursery and yet wants benefits to avoid work.
 
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Has she actually said she is claiming UC?? I find a lot about her life to be unbelievable but SURELY she wouldn't do that?!
 
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I find it baffling how surprised she is that looking after a baby is difficult when she's had a lot of foster babies. Surely few new mothers have had that much hands on experience!
 
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