So the sad bint isn't actually drawing on the wall, she's drawing on a photo of the wall on her phone, for attention. Grow le fuck up, Babs. Get a creative hobby, volunteer in a food bank, take a night school class - instead of behaving like a teenager. How humiliating for your husband and children.Now that's being kind to Babs and insulting to the pond
Fixed Babs latest rambling for her
View attachment 1273657
The eagle and fat arse peach emoji's killed me ffsCalling a pre tingo that by the end of the week we'll have the rehashed spread eagle Babs on the bed
yeah, obvs the only reason he's having to store his tat in the shed is because their hobbit house is filled to bursting with babs' own collection of plastic tat, and it's not as though he even has his own designated storage in babs' bedroom, because it's HER room only. he clearly has far less of a tat collection if he can fit it into a shed, so it's pretty hypocritical of her to complain about him when she has her own tat hoard that's a million times larger!Pretty hypocritical of Emma to be criticising Steven for having loads of tat in his shed!
And risk too much air??!!Bab, you really need to get off your fat, lardy arse and get some cleaning done in your house. Your windows and frame are a disgrace! Dirty, mouldy and cobwebs. Just a tip, if you actually opened the windows, maybe your your house wouldnt have the problem with damp and mould.
You hit the nail on the head here! Especially in the last paragraph! I hate these mum stereotypes too. I never do the things she claims all mums do. I’m not tired all the time. I don’t miss my son on a night out. It infuriates me that she seems to think this is the case for all mums.It's becoming more and more apparent that she's using her platforms to validate her life choices. So often she puts out posts and reels where she's essentially commanding her followers to do a certain thing, eg if it's hot you must have an ice cream, if it's your period you must have cake, if you're going out you must tuck your tights into your bra (genuinely mystified by this one!), if it's Valentines Day you mustn't sleep with your husband!
She does it all the time and because she will get lots of comments agreeing with her it makes her feel like what she's doing is normal. She's created an echo chamber where she's constantly told she's doing the right thing when in fact she's leading an incredibly unhealthy lifestyle and, even worse, she's telling her followers it's ok.
I'm so tired of the endless "mum" stereotypes - we don't all have mum tums or are tired all the time (her kids are 9 and 11, not toddlers!) or wear big pants. And how can she be talking about grabbing a few minutes peace when she's literally on her own all day!!
You win the whole of the internet with that! Absolutely brilliantBabs Tribute
"Em" - parody of "Belle" from beauty and the beast
Excuse the broken up verses, this is a mixture of Emma/cowbags/Babette's/Ste (a bit like the original Disney songI'm on the quiet period of a night shift and have way too much time on my hands )
Set the scene.. Emma wandering the streets of Brum whilst mulling over her content/life.
Enjoy
(Emma)
Little gram
It's a rehashed platform
Everyday, content is a bore
Little gram
Full of my lovely people
Waking up to say..
(Babette's)
Yas kween, yas kween, yas kween yas kween yas kween!
(Emma)
You'll see me baking but it's fake, like always
The same old Saturday - it's hell
Every morning just the same
With my pit stories again
To those poor, provincial trolls -
(Passer by)
"Good morning Bab!"
(Emma)
Good morning lovely friend!
(Passer by)
Where you off to?
(Emma)
Off to Primark, I just saw the most wonderful frock there! It's an 18, with pockets -
(Passer by)
Ah, that's shite!
Marie! The jizz rolls!
Hurry up!
(Cowbags)
Look there she goes, that gals deranged, no question
Crazed and erratic can't you tell?
Very crude and oh so loud
And she seems to be so proud
No denying she's a funny girl that Em
(Man)
Bonjour!
(Emma)
Good day!
(Man)
How many followers?
(Woman)
Bonjour, good day, that's Ste's bitch wife!
(Woman)
That taming twins! She's overtaken her -
(Emma)
There must be more than this insta filled life
(Primark shop assistant)
Ah, my number one customer!
(Emma)
Good morning - I've come to buy that new frock for content
(Shop assistant)
It's gone already!
(Emma)
Oh, I need it for my reels - have you got anything new?
(Shop person)
Haha, not since you asked yesterday!
(Emma)
That's fine, I'll just take... This one!
*Emma snatches a too small dress off the clothing rack that will NOT suit her*
(Shop assistant)
That one?! But it's a size 16!
(Emma)
But these are my favourite! Stretchy material, i can squeeze in it, my gunt is disguised -
(Shop assistant)
If you're that desperate for likes and validation, it's yours!
(Emma)
But Bab?!
(Shop assistant)
I insist, now fuck off and stop hounding me!
(Emma)
Why I could weep - thank you very much!
*Exits the shop*
(Cowbags)
Look there she flumps, that gal is so unstable
So grey and yellow, she can't be well
Flaunting her "meagre" wealth
Lies about her mental health
What an attention seeking kween that Em..
(Emma)
Ohhh aren't I just amazing?
I adore and love myself, because, you'll see
Here's Ste my real prince charming
But I fantasize about my ex, cos that's just me...
(Ste)
Right from the moment when I met her, I bored her
I'm a pushover, she could tell
Here in Brum it's only she
Who would marry plain old me
So I'm making plans to flee to Brighton town!
(Brighton boys)
Look there Ste goes, isn't he dreamy?
Those cycle shorts, oh he's so cute!
Be still, my heart, he's leaving Babba
He's such a tall, dark, long and Irish hunk!
(Babette's)
"Morning"!
"Hi Bab!"
"Did you see that new vlog?!"
"Disney holiday - again?"
(Ste) "Please let me through!"
(Babette's) "Not more fake baking!"
"Those pastries are stale!"
"But Babs will eat them!"
(Emma)
There must be more than this Instagram life!
(Ste)
Just watch I'm going to escape my wife!
(Babette's/cowbags)
Look there she goes, that gal thinks she's so special
Her contents drying up as well
It's a pity and a sin
All the frocks she can't fit in
She really is a funny gal
A boozy, slurring, vile twat
Her contents full of tat and crap...
That's Em..
"Yas kween, yas kween, yas kween, yas kween, yas kween!"
And they look shit. There’s no difference between the outfits, so the whole ‘one is in her 20s, one is in her 40s’ is irrelevant- and just shows that Bethany has shit, old-lady taste. They both need to look at how unhealthy they look too - it’s not a great look.The dressing up real with the new bestie is up, it’s essentially 2 grown adults putting on different outfits. How the fuck is that helping anyone?
Amazing this is the content I like to crunchBabs Tribute
"Em" - parody of "Belle" from beauty and the beast
Excuse the broken up verses, this is a mixture of Emma/cowbags/Babette's/Ste (a bit like the original Disney songI'm on the quiet period of a night shift and have way too much time on my hands )
Set the scene.. Emma wandering the streets of Brum whilst mulling over her content/life.
Enjoy
(Emma)
Little gram
It's a rehashed platform
Everyday, content is a bore
Little gram
Full of my lovely people
Waking up to say..
(Babette's)
Yas kween, yas kween, yas kween yas kween yas kween!
(Emma)
You'll see me baking but it's fake, like always
The same old Saturday - it's hell
Every morning just the same
With my pit stories again
To those poor, provincial trolls -
(Passer by)
"Good morning Bab!"
(Emma)
Good morning lovely friend!
(Passer by)
Where you off to?
(Emma)
Off to Primark, I just saw the most wonderful frock there! It's an 18, with pockets -
(Passer by)
Ah, that's shite!
Marie! The jizz rolls!
Hurry up!
(Cowbags)
Look there she goes, that gals deranged, no question
Crazed and erratic can't you tell?
Very crude and oh so loud
And she seems to be so proud
No denying she's a funny girl that Em
(Man)
Bonjour!
(Emma)
Good day!
(Man)
How many followers?
(Woman)
Bonjour, good day, that's Ste's bitch wife!
(Woman)
That taming twins! She's overtaken her -
(Emma)
There must be more than this insta filled life
(Primark shop assistant)
Ah, my number one customer!
(Emma)
Good morning - I've come to buy that new frock for content
(Shop assistant)
It's gone already!
(Emma)
Oh, I need it for my reels - have you got anything new?
(Shop person)
Haha, not since you asked yesterday!
(Emma)
That's fine, I'll just take... This one!
*Emma snatches a too small dress off the clothing rack that will NOT suit her*
(Shop assistant)
That one?! But it's a size 16!
(Emma)
But these are my favourite! Stretchy material, i can squeeze in it, my gunt is disguised -
(Shop assistant)
If you're that desperate for likes and validation, it's yours!
(Emma)
But Bab?!
(Shop assistant)
I insist, now fuck off and stop hounding me!
(Emma)
Why I could weep - thank you very much!
*Exits the shop*
(Cowbags)
Look there she flumps, that gal is so unstable
So grey and yellow, she can't be well
Flaunting her "meagre" wealth
Lies about her mental health
What an attention seeking kween that Em..
(Emma)
Ohhh aren't I just amazing?
I adore and love myself, because, you'll see
Here's Ste my real prince charming
But I fantasize about my ex, cos that's just me...
(Ste)
Right from the moment when I met her, I bored her
I'm a pushover, she could tell
Here in Brum it's only she
Who would marry plain old me
So I'm making plans to flee to Brighton town!
(Brighton boys)
Look there Ste goes, isn't he dreamy?
Those cycle shorts, oh he's so cute!
Be still, my heart, he's leaving Babba
He's such a tall, dark, long and Irish hunk!
(Babette's)
"Morning"!
"Hi Bab!"
"Did you see that new vlog?!"
"Disney holiday - again?"
(Ste) "Please let me through!"
(Babette's) "Not more fake baking!"
"Those pastries are stale!"
"But Babs will eat them!"
(Emma)
There must be more than this Instagram life!
(Ste)
Just watch I'm going to escape my wife!
(Babette's/cowbags)
Look there she goes, that gal thinks she's so special
Her contents drying up as well
It's a pity and a sin
All the frocks she can't fit in
She really is a funny gal
A boozy, slurring, vile twat
Her contents full of tat and crap...
That's Em..
"Yas kween, yas kween, yas kween, yas kween, yas kween!"
Manic Monday
Tedious Tuesday
Wonderful (fruit & veg) Wednesday
Therapy Thursday
F-off & let us enjoy our Fridays
Slob all day Saturday
And breathe, Sunday is all oursxx
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