Breast feeding

[DirtyLaundry]

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[AmberSpyglass]

Interesting

 

[Sure. name changed]

So much nope on this thread. Breastfeeding IS hard. It’s hard whether baby takes straight to it or not. She shouldn’t just give up because it’s hard if she wants to do it. ‘Just express’ isn’t an easy option either. Being Hooked up to a pump every three hours for 30 minutes day and night isn’t an easy option. She’s allowed to complain. She’s allowed to show women that it’s normal for it to be difficult. The NHS tells us it’s natural and easy. I’m definitely not her biggest fan but telling a woman how to feed her baby is not appropriate.

 

[SmartieQueen]

No, she shouldn’t just give up and put Grey on a bottle because she’s finding it difficult and it’s comments and views like that which result in the low breastfeeding rates in the UK. Breastfeeding can be difficult, it can be agony, it’s tiring and it’s all on YOU. Good on her for continuing even though it’s difficult, she’s had mastitis in the first month and I’ve been there (7 times now actually) and the pain is horrific, I’d rather have the pain of labour than mastitis tbh. So, please stop putting her down over her feeding choices, it’s unnecessary.

 

[Juliet]

I’m not putting her down as such. I’d just like to understand breast feeders way of thinking, would switching to bottle feeding so that mum and baby are both happy and healthy not be better than struggling in pain? I know ultimately it’s the mothers choice and I respect that but I do wonder why.

 

[Deepsigh2018]

The thing is you have to struggle through the pain to get to the point where its easy. I was in so much pain for I think almost a month as my nipples got used to having someone latched to them and with both my kids at the beginning it felt like they were always attached to me while feeding was established and then one day it was just the easiest thing ever.

I have never got on with expressing it is not an easy option at all and I think mums who manage to express to feed their children are amazing. I used to struggle to provide my eldest son with two bottles of milk whilst he was at nursery so I gave him formula for nursery.

Ultimately I think all feeding decisions are nobody elses business if she wants to breastfeed I think its great shes showing its not as easy in the beginning as it appears on tv. I was shocked by this as my mum and sister never mentioned how much it hurt until I tried to do it with my eldest.
I also think if she wanted to bottle feed then thats great too.

Mums should not be shamed for their feeding choices.

 

[LittleFlower]

I understand it's a struggle and of course she should keep going if it's what she wants to do but just think posting pictures of yourself crying is a bit much. Either get on with it because it's what you want to do or look at other options.

 

[Sure. name changed]

I’m not putting her down as such. I’d just like to understand breast feeders way of thinking, would switching to bottle feeding so that mum and baby are both happy and healthy not be better than struggling in pain? I know ultimately it’s the mothers choice and I respect that but I do wonder why.

For me it was stubbornness. I wanted to do it so I would. I didn’t want to quit as for me I’d be ashamed. When I spoke to other ladies, they had a similar train of thought but each woman’s motivation for breast feeding or not is completely different.

 

[CatHun]

No, she shouldn’t just give up and put Grey on a bottle because she’s finding it difficult and it’s comments and views like that which result in the low breastfeeding rates in the UK. Breastfeeding can be difficult, it can be agony, it’s tiring and it’s all on YOU. Good on her for continuing even though it’s difficult, she’s had mastitis in the first month and I’ve been there (7 times now actually) and the pain is horrific, I’d rather have the pain of labour than mastitis tbh. So, please stop putting her down over her feeding choices, it’s unnecessary.

A million times this!!

The lack of support in the uk is laughable and comments like ‘just put her on the bottle’ are exactly why the rates are so low.

Breastfeeding is hard, nobody shows you how to do it, no classes can prepare you and there is nobody there in the middle of the night to support you. I’ve had mastitis too, and agree I’d rather give birth again than have that, the pain was unreal.

As for the question why do you do it if it’s so hard? Because it’s by far the best thing you can do for your baby. Simple as that. If it’s not your choice to breastfeed then it’s not your choice and that’s completely up to you and to be honest I can see why people give up, it’s really really difficult.

I agree with the other poster, I’m stubborn and I wanted to breastfeed him and was determined to make it work. One day it just clicks and it’s the easiest thing in the world.

 

[Taco Cat]

Give her a break! Post partum and breastfeeding is HARD.

 

[cccccccmmmmmmmmm]

I understand it's a struggle and of course she should keep going if it's what she wants to do but just think posting pictures of yourself crying is a bit much. Either get on with it because it's what you want to do or look at other options.

Absolutely agree with this!!

This was the exact point I was making. Breast feed or bottle feed, I truly don't give a tit either way, but don't put attention seeking crying-face photos on the internet, it just makes me roll my eyes and think you're a bit of a twit. I mean, who on earth, whilst crying in (presumably) agonising pain, thinks 'oooh where's my phone, I must take a pic of myself sobbing'? Seriously. Get a grip, woman.

 

[Deleted member 48]

"The lack of support in the uk is laughable and comments like ‘just put her on the bottle’ are exactly why the rates are so low. "

Maybe this is a regional thing, but where I live in the UK I felt I had plenty of support. I had lessons at my NHS class, a lesson at my NCT class and at my local hospital I was invited to and attended a breastfeeding workshop. I was aware of breastfeeding clinics at my local children's centre and the local NCT was available for lots of support. When my daughter didn't gain enough weight my midwife and then health visitor helped and encouraged me. The support available here was far from "laughable".

 

[CatHun]

"The lack of support in the uk is laughable and comments like ‘just put her on the bottle’ are exactly why the rates are so low. "

Maybe this is a regional thing, but where I live in the UK I felt I had plenty of support. I had lessons at my NHS class, a lesson at my NCT class and at my local hospital I was invited to and attended a breastfeeding workshop. I was aware of breastfeeding clinics at my local children's centre and the local NCT was available for lots of support. When my daughter didn't gain enough weight my midwife and then health visitor helped and encouraged me. The support available here was far from "laughable".

These things aren’t there for you at 8pm on a Friday night when you’re struggling to feed your baby and you need to wait for Monday for a breastfeeding clinic though. In our case it was particularly difficult as our baby was born just before the Easter weekend so it was even longer than usual.

We attended the lessons before the birth of how to breastfeed and I’m not sure about you but putting a doll to my breast wasn’t the same as being faced with trying to feed an actual baby.
At no point did anyone say just how difficult it would be, they glossed over a lot of the issues people would face and one of the feeding team I spoke to said that they felt like if they said just how difficult it could be that no one would even try.

Perhaps in my area the uptake is particularly low but I don’t feel like the support is there unless you really shout for it. When my son was born we were discharged with no idea how to feed. We were the only family out of 8 on the ward even attempting to breastfeed.
It sounds like a lot of your support resource came from the nct which is quite sparse here so maybe that’s what’s made us feel differently about the support.

 

[SunshineSally]

Don't you have to pay for NCT classes?

 

[Deleted member 48]

Don't you have to pay for NCT classes?

You pay for the NCT classes but the after support and help is available for everyone free of charge. There are also free places available for those on low incomes. If you are interested in breastfeeding it is worth investing in NCT classes as they are very supportive. The free Children's Centres were also excellent and had breastfeeding cafes for women to get advice from a professional and support from each other.

On a non-breastfeeding note (for which some of you will be very thankful ), have you noticed that Grey's first Father's Day present for Rich was a #prgift?

 

[Ilando]

Sadly the issue of feeding always descends into people being offended or getting hot under the collar.

 

[cccccccmmmmmmmmm]

Sadly the issue of feeding always descends into people being offended or getting hot under the collar.

Yep, it's really very odd. Personally I couldn't care less how anybody chooses to feed their kids, I just don't want to seeing ridiculous 'poor me' crying photos on instagram.

 

[SmartieQueen]

Well, the ridiculous poor me photo would have made me feel better if I’d seen it at 3 weeks post partum and I was on my 4th bout of mastitis. It would have made me feel a little less alone. I also got plenty of ‘just give a bottle’ comments which are pretty crappy when you’re dealing with horrible pain but you’re gritting your teeth and battling on as you know it’ll get easy soon. It did get easy, thankfully, and I hope it does for her too.

I didn’t breastfeed my eldest, I combi fed my middle so I’ve done it all different ways.

 

[Foobar]

I feel like I’ve missed something... who’s got a baby called Grey and is struggling with breastfeeding?

 

[CatHun]

I feel like I’ve missed something... who’s got a baby called Grey and is struggling with breastfeeding?

Lily pebbles, breastfeeding is tough to get to grips with for normal people let alone a serial whinger like lily.
Saying that she’s giving a much more accurate representation of how it is than fleur did