I have seen that a lot: basic job titles transformed into something far more spectacular, with the hint of being equally as important/impressive, even though the actual job remains the same (management are mostly guilty of this)
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More of a job advert one but when they are looking for people with a "can-do attitude"
Also when everyone has "engineer" in their title even though they are in no way any sort of engineer. "IT support engineer". "Sales engineer". Just, wut?
Also when everyone has "engineer" in their title even though they are in no way any sort of engineer. "IT support engineer". "Sales engineer". Just, wut?
Virtual Headset
view from the bridge
Is it in the playbook
Firefighting
Send it via the front door
all a load of nonsense!
view from the bridge
Is it in the playbook
Firefighting
Send it via the front door
all a load of nonsense!
Another one from my call as of two minutes ago:
‘have you got the bandwidth to pick this up?’
‘have you got the bandwidth to pick this up?’
Never heard that used before but it has got to be one of the worst
Yep. In the old days it would be"Have you for the time to pick this up?"Never heard that used before but it has got to be one of the worst
But now of course you have to use the lingo in order to stay "in the loop" so to speak.
I was once sent an invite for a ”brown bag lunch” - I genuinely had no idea what this was and had to google it. It’s an Americanism for bring your own lunch to the meeting. I said I’d be using the brown bag to throw up into after hearing all the BS 
I was talking to my mother via Skype a couple of days ago, and got talking about her younger days especially during the 80s.
She used to carry around something called a Filofax, and spoke about "Benchmark practices", "Tubular mindsets", "Contingency working", "Cutting edge thinking"
Clearly, talking corporate shite isn't a new thing!
She used to carry around something called a Filofax, and spoke about "Benchmark practices", "Tubular mindsets", "Contingency working", "Cutting edge thinking"
Clearly, talking corporate shite isn't a new thing!
I always wanted a Filofax they were so fancy
haha we have loads of brown bag sessions at our company! For us they’re lunchtime meetings that are almost like informal how-to’s etc. So someone would do a brown bag session on getting most out of MS Teams or something. Such a cringe one though!I was once sent an invite for a ”brown bag lunch” - I genuinely had no idea what this was and had to google it. It’s an Americanism for bring your own lunch to the meeting. I said I’d be using the brown bag to throw up into after hearing all the BS
why can’t people just say that though?! I feel like we’re being treated less and less like people. I’m not a computer hard drive or a server! I don’t have a capacity limit or bandwidth hahaha!
I had a Funfax as a child, bloody loved it
Before my time, but wasn't a filofax just glorified diary that cost 10 times as much?I had a Funfax as a child, bloody loved it
Same! I got one a few times at our annual school book fair thing, I also vaguely remember getting one that was (I think) Worst Witch themed that came with a magic wand. anyone else?I had a Funfax as a child, bloody loved it
Added to corporate jargon, and this is probably the same in all industries, but appropriating words in contexts that don't make sense/should be used for other things. i.e. my workplace uses the term "counselling sessions" for meetings with external clients
' I hope this email finds you well '
'Meetings'
'Meetings'
I got one last Christmas and apart from 2020 turning in to a tit show I used it loads in January and February because I love pen and paper. Even though I work in IT
Our work call that supplier engagement - so bloody cringe worthy
Any other civil servants here? Civil service jargon is on another level, and I’m not even going to mention the acronyms
Peel the onion - it’s enough to make you cry. 
Going the extra mile - oh shut up just tell people what you want them to do rather than suggesting that they 'go the extra mile' 