Alcoholism

[37BBL]

Well that didn't last long!

Back on the bottle - 2nd bottle of wine today. Not good. Yes, I know I should keep off the booze, and I have been in contact with AA, but its not enough.

I need to start afresh but its not going to happen here. The wine and my work keeps me sane. And this lockdown doesn't help at all.

2 bottles of JC in one day. Not good: not clever, and yet I don't feel at all drunk or vague in my thinking.

Plenty of answers but not the right ones

Do you have anyone who can support you? You aren't in denial about it which is a massive step.

Take each day as it comes and maybe try a change of routine. When you would normally reach for the bottle, try a walk, a fitness video on YouTube, baking - if you manage to avoid just one drink see it as a small success.

Nothing happens overnight, keep going xxxx

 

[Mulholland Drive]

Please don't beat yourself up. It's ridiculously hard to avoid alcohol completely in the early days, I would suggest weaning off it until you feel like you can try one day without. Have you got a specific routine of pouring a glass I.e. where the glass is stored in your house, the bottle etc. It sounds silly but I found hiding the alcohol behind stuff in the kitchen helped my brain forget about where it was. If you live with someone ask them to hide it or better yet throw it out. Not buying it is the best way to keep away. All the best.

Do you have anyone who can support you? You aren't in denial about it which is a massive step.

Take each day as it comes and maybe try a change of routine. When you would normally reach for the bottle, try a walk, a fitness video on YouTube, baking - if you manage to avoid just one drink see it as a small success.

Nothing happens overnight, keep going xxxx

In a moment of sobriety I have just poured 4 bottles of Jacob's Creek down the loo, leaving me with just one. Hopefully that will keep me going for the next day or so as I really don't fancy going out in this weather, especially since the nearest shop that sells this stuff is about 15 miles away!

Moreover, if I do start drinking again today, I won't be able to drive. So that's another incentive.

The big challenge is when I do go to the shop in the next couple of days, is that I don't do what I usually do and buy a case of JC (usually 6 bottles), as this generally works out cheaper per bottle than buying individually. And of course with so many bottles in the house, that's when I get into trouble.

But we shall see.

 

[CosmicCreepers]

In a moment of sobriety I have just poured 4 bottles of Jacob's Creek down the loo, leaving me with just one. Hopefully that will keep me going for the next day or so as I really don't fancy going out in this weather, especially since the nearest shop that sells this stuff is about 15 miles away!

Moreover, if I do start drinking again today, I won't be able to drive. So that's another incentive.

The big challenge is when I do go to the shop in the next couple of days, is that I don't do what I usually do and buy a case of JC (usually 6 bottles), as this generally works out cheaper per bottle than buying individually. And of course with so many bottles in the house, that's when I get into trouble.

But we shall see.

I'm really, really proud of you!! Its amazing you were able to pour it down the sink, I did that once and it really cemented in my head "you don't need this."

I try and avoid going down the alcohol aisle at the supermarkets now, unfortunately my local Tesco had the brilliant idea of putting all the soft fizzy drinks in the same aisle as the alcohol...I know this is the usual layout but I'm sure ASDA have theirs seperate. And I love my fizzy drinks so it's a bit hard sometimes having to go down that aisle.

I'm so happy for you

 

[Annie101]

Well that didn't last long!

Back on the bottle - 2nd bottle of wine today. Not good. Yes, I know I should keep off the booze, and I have been in contact with AA, but its not enough.

I need to start afresh but its not going to happen here. The wine and my work keeps me sane. And this lockdown doesn't help at all.

2 bottles of JC in one day. Not good: not clever, and yet I don't feel at all drunk or vague in my thinking.

Plenty of answers but not the right ones

Sorry to hear that, you know you might not feel drunk or vague in your thinking, but your partner would see and feel the difference in your actions and reactions. From your previous post i note that you are a strong person - you know you can overcome this. I dont want to sound preachy but please take action immediately and take care of yourself. Lots of Love

 

[Mulholland Drive]

Sorry to hear that, you know you might not feel drunk or vague in your thinking, but your partner would see and feel the difference in your actions and reactions. From your previous post i note that you are a strong person - you know you can overcome this. I dont want to sound preachy but please take action immediately and take care of yourself. Lots of Love

Thanks for the kind words. Just to complicate things I split with my partner a week or so ago over an unrelated matter. But certainly doesn't help when I find myself in a dark place mentally speaking.

But I have a plan in place, so hopefully I'll get through it soon enough

 

[Definitelyme]

Sorry to hear that, you know you might not feel drunk or vague in your thinking, but your partner would see and feel the difference in your actions and reactions. From your previous post i note that you are a strong person - you know you can overcome this. I dont want to sound preachy but please take action immediately and take care of yourself. Lots of Love

Annie how are things in your house recently?

 

[Annie101]

When i say things are good, i mean that i am not being verbally and emotionally abused. I am not locked outside the house or locked inside a room. Those are my good days. He is not drinking but with all the dry drunk symptoms, it makes me sad going home at night, and hear what pissed him off during the day and just vomiting negative stuff. I get sent flowers etc, and i appreciate it, but in my perfect world it would be nice not feeling tense, nervous going home or being in an amazing mood and him being so negative so that it sucks all the life out of me. But like they say - one day at a time. Thanks for your support on our little group xx

 

[Definitelyme]

When i say things are good, i mean that i am not being verbally and emotionally abused. I am not locked outside the house or locked inside a room. Those are my good days. He is not drinking but with all the dry drunk symptoms, it makes me sad going home at night, and hear what pissed him off during the day and just vomiting negative stuff. I get sent flowers etc, and i appreciate it, but in my perfect world it would be nice not feeling tense, nervous going home or being in an amazing mood and him being so negative so that it sucks all the life out of me. But like they say - one day at a time. Thanks for your support on our little group xx

Sounds like things are still so tough for you, and I’m so sorry to hear that. Better doesn’t mean good, and nobody should ever have to feel worried about going home. Am I right in saying you got a little dog recently? How is s/he getting on?

 

[Annie101]

Highlight and love of my life. Sorry for non dog lovers out there, but we even have our baths together

 

[37BBL]

Highlight and love of my life. Sorry for non dog lovers out there, but we even have our baths together

Gorgeous. And sounds like a much needed companion for you x

 

[Definitelyme]

Highlight and love of my life. Sorry for non dog lovers out there, but we even have our baths together

A little fluff ball! I’m very glad you have such a sweetie to cuddle up to.

 

[mcfeez]

Highlight and love of my life. Sorry for non dog lovers out there, but we even have our baths together

What a cutie

 

[LittleBird]

My ex text me a bunch of quite rude and boarder line emotionally abusive texts last night and into this morning after I asked for help around selling the house (I'm doing all the admin for it).

Told me I had chosen to leave him and I am making his drinking much worse and I am the problem. Although I know this isn't the case, I feel empty inside today and have finally asked to speak to a doctor about stress and anxiety that grew from this relationship. The worst thing about this lockdown is not being able to pop over to my parents or friends for some support. WhatsApp isn't quite the same.

 

[Annie101]

It is always someone else's fault according to an alcoholic. It takes guilt away from them. Don't go alone through this, we are all here for you as we all have the same struggles and you can PM me any time. You are not alone.

 

[Mulholland Drive]

So with my one remaining bottle of wine, I've have decided to water it down- 4 parts water 1 part wine.

Doesn't taste of anything, which I guess is the point. So tempted to just get in the car, go to the shop and stock up. But I know that would be dumb.

And yet.....

 

[Gembo]

So with my one remaining bottle of wine, I've have decided to water it down- 4 parts water 1 part wine.

Doesn't taste of anything, which I guess is the point. So tempted to just get in the car, go to the shop and stock up. But I know that would be dumb.

And yet.....

Don’t. Please don’t.
Do you know what drives your desire to drink? What are your triggers? Are you sometimes able to overcome or never able to? Do you feel that it’s getting dangerously out of control? x

 

[Mulholland Drive]

Don’t. Please don’t.
Do you know what drives your desire to drink? What are your triggers? Are you sometimes able to overcome or never able to? Do you feel that it’s getting dangerously out of control? x

Don't worry. I won't be driving anywhere. Have got my work to keep me occupied. Just don't like this time of year (I have SAD). And when I get depressed i turn to the booze!

I suppose in one respect joining Tattle has helped a great deal, as well as getting in touch with AA. But like other alcoholics on this thread, it doesn't really matter what help you reach out too at the end of the day its up to the individual to get through it once and for all.

 

[Annie101]

Don't worry. I won't be driving anywhere. Have got my work to keep me occupied. Just don't like this time of year (I have SAD). And when I get depressed i turn to the booze!

I suppose in one respect joining Tattle has helped a great deal, as well as getting in touch with AA. But like other alcoholics on this thread, it doesn't really matter what help you reach out too at the end of the day its up to the individual to get through it once and for all.

i think its best for you to get your a** back to SA

 

[Gembo]

Don't worry. I won't be driving anywhere. Have got my work to keep me occupied. Just don't like this time of year (I have SAD). And when I get depressed i turn to the booze!

I suppose in one respect joining Tattle has helped a great deal, as well as getting in touch with AA. But like other alcoholics on this thread, it doesn't really matter what help you reach out too at the end of the day its up to the individual to get through it once and for all.

Yes absolutely, all of us can only really help ourselves. I can’t lie and say I fully understand your struggle because I don’t and I hope I don’t cross a line saying this but I watched alcohol destroy my parents lives and it killed my mum and my nan, don’t ever be afraid to reach out for help. I’ve seen what it can do and it’s awful. I sincerely wish you the best and hope that you can overcome this

 

[37BBL]

Don't worry. I won't be driving anywhere. Have got my work to keep me occupied. Just don't like this time of year (I have SAD). And when I get depressed i turn to the booze!

I suppose in one respect joining Tattle has helped a great deal, as well as getting in touch with AA. But like other alcoholics on this thread, it doesn't really matter what help you reach out too at the end of the day its up to the individual to get through it once and for all.

Just keep going hun. My sibling is an alcoholic. Spent 7 months in rehab, relapsed several times in the last 5 months since coming out. I can't relate at all, I dislike her more than you could imagine, as she has done some truly awful things and caused an unimaginable amount of pain.
You sound like you aren't at that stage and I really hope you can get through with the correct help and support. Keep using your work as a distraction.
Xxx

My ex text me a bunch of quite rude and boarder line emotionally abusive texts last night and into this morning after I asked for help around selling the house (I'm doing all the admin for it).

Told me I had chosen to leave him and I am making his drinking much worse and I am the problem. Although I know this isn't the case, I feel empty inside today and have finally asked to speak to a doctor about stress and anxiety that grew from this relationship. The worst thing about this lockdown is not being able to pop over to my parents or friends for some support. WhatsApp isn't quite the same.

I read a quote once which said something like, alcoholics are the most selfish people and don't think of the hurt and pain they cause but they expect everyone to sacrifice things when they decide they want to change. Its stuck with me ever since I read it.
It certainly isn't your fault he drank and you cannot be to blame.
We are all here for you to talk to x