2021 Weddings

[bellinibobble]

Hi everyone, signing in as I wondered if there was a 2021 brides thread!

We are meant to be getting married abroad in September, we were sub 30 guests from the start so I’m really hoping we manage it. I’m very head in the sand about it at the moment.. it does help to have fantastic planners though who are beating most of the stress. We have been engaged a couple of years and together forever, since I was 18 and I’m nearly 30 now so I’m desperate for us to be married

 

[nbt]

Agree with the last two posts.

All the fun has been sucked out and I feel like I don’t want our wedding to happen either. I feel like it’s a big stress talking about it and have also had my head in the sand.

We’ve basically paid up so would have a lot of money coming back to us from the venue, as long as they weren’t awkward with it. We’ve decided we’re going to use it for a house deposit this year instead. Then we’ll have a quiet thing at some point just the 5 of us (three children) and that way, hopefully nothing will get in the way and it’ll happen no matter what. Will try and keep what we can to avoid losing deposits - stick with some flowers, hopefully keep our photographer etc.

We’ve been together 13 years this year and have an 8 year old son together so it’s really just cementing it and changing my name which now feels important to me!

 

[Insta-fan]

We were meant to be July 11th 2020. Postponed until April 2021. Can’t see it happen. Our venue want an extra £2000 to postpone again until 2022 as they have no dates available for 2021. I just can’t be bothered with the whole thing any more! I feel guilty telling my fiancé how I feel, but I don’t even want a wedding any more. I’d rather just pop down to the registry office and sign the papers. But doing that would upset so many.
Should be the happiest time but it’s really not.

 

[TicketyTock]

We were meant to be July 11th 2020. Postponed until April 2021. Can’t see it happen. Our venue want an extra £2000 to postpone again until 2022 as they have no dates available for 2021. I just can’t be bothered with the whole thing any more! I feel guilty telling my fiancé how I feel, but I don’t even want a wedding any more. I’d rather just pop down to the registry office and sign the papers. But doing that would upset so many.
Should be the happiest time but it’s really not.

I was the same as you , I didn’t want to tell my boyfriend at first as the reason we are having such a big wedding is because of me! He would have been quite happy to just go to the registry office us 2 , but as us women do I wanted the whole shabang! So I couldn’t bring myself to tell him that now I want what he would have been happy with all along and we could have been married 3 years ago and also not wasted all this money on deposits ! But I actually told him last night ! And he said that’s fine we can just work something out , I think we get more worked up just letting things tick over in our heads rather than just speaking out aloud ! I can’t believe your venue ! I understand they will have been struggling but to ask for another 2K to move your date which is totally out of your hands is day light robbery!

 

[nbt]

We were meant to be July 11th 2020. Postponed until April 2021. Can’t see it happen. Our venue want an extra £2000 to postpone again until 2022 as they have no dates available for 2021. I just can’t be bothered with the whole thing any more! I feel guilty telling my fiancé how I feel, but I don’t even want a wedding any more. I’d rather just pop down to the registry office and sign the papers. But doing that would upset so many.
Should be the happiest time but it’s really not.

Have you discussed with your fiancé?

Honestly, don’t even think about anyone else other than the two of you. This is such a stressful time and horrible when the excitement is taken away. You’ve got to do what will work best for you two.

 

[bellinibobble]

He would have been quite happy to just go to the registry office us 2 , but as us women do I wanted the whole shabang!

I relate to this! Not as much with my fiancé, but I’ll be the second of my close friends to get married and the first of two sisters - I keep flitting between just wanting to be married and then thinking, I’m gonna have tonnes of weddings to attend in the next ten years, and I know I’ll begrudge going and spending money on all that when I didn’t get to have the day of my choice it’s so hard to know what to do!

 

[Prgirl_cesca]

I was supposed to be married august 2020 , now it’s august 2021 , we have been engaged for 3 years together for 7 , all the fun has gone from the wedding I don’t even think I want to get married august 2021 , I think I would much rather just go away the two of us and do it that way , the thing that’s stopping me cancelling is deposits - we have spent ALOT of money on deposits for everything venue : florist : hair : make up : cake etc etc etc my dress is paid in full . I really don’t no what to do I feel I don’t want my wedding anymore as I can’t see it being the way I wanted it to be and all the fun had been wiped from it , but I also can’t comprehend loosing a few thousand we have paid out in deposits and then the few thousand that my dress cost , it’s a lot of money to be waisted

Definitely consider having a micro wedding. Your suppliers will cost less (obviously apart from the dress) and you won't lose the deposits. You can keep all your existing suppliers and have a very small wedding. Maybe discuss with your venue closer to the time?

I did some micro weddings last year (some were 120 people originally and went ahead with 15) and they were SOOOOOO lovely. I have been a coordinator for a very long time (over a decade) and it was some of the nicest weddings I have ever had.

Definitely look into what your venue can host size wise rather than go to the register office if you can! You still get the beautiful photography that you probably booked the venue for.

 

[bolimepipi]

just keep in mind if your wedding is somewhere where you need catering, the smaller the guest count the pricier the menu

 

[Barbie2020]

I’m so sorry you are all feeling the same way! It is so rubbish. I wish we’d got engaged a couple of years earlier and avoided all this

Our friends have got a similar type wedding with the same amount of numbers booked a couple of months before ours so I’m trying to see what happens with theirs. I know there are so many of us in the same boat but it doesn’t make it any easier.

I really don’t want to cancel I hope we can get sorted to have a smaller wedding. I don’t want to let suppliers down they have had it so hard this last year and I’d rather they at least got a bit of money from our wedding.

I’m really hoping with the vaccine and when we get closer to spring we might have an idea of how this year will pan out

 

[nbt]

I’ve emailed our venue and now I’m really nervous about what the response will be

 

[Insta-fan]

It’s a crazy amount extra isn’t it. For nothing extra. Not even a drop of alcohol extra. There reasoning was well we postponed it once for free.
Also through principal I want to move venues as I just don’t want to pay the extra to them (if that makes sense) I’d rather pay extra to another venue than theirs.
Gosh I wish we’d have done it sooner too!! I know my fiancé would support whatever I chose to do, but I can’t imagine me telling him I don’t even look forward to the wedding etc be the best news.


QUOTE="TicketyTock, post: 3441040, member: 130712"]
I was the same as you , I didn’t want to tell my boyfriend at first as the reason we are having such a big wedding is because of me! He would have been quite happy to just go to the registry office us 2 , but as us women do I wanted the whole shabang! So I couldn’t bring myself to tell him that now I want what he would have been happy with all along and we could have been married 3 years ago and also not wasted all this money on deposits ! But I actually told him last night ! And he said that’s fine we can just work something out , I think we get more worked up just letting things tick over in our heads rather than just speaking out aloud ! I can’t believe your venue ! I understand they will have been struggling but to ask for another 2K to move your date which is totally out of your hands is day light robbery!
[/QUOTE]

 

[nbt]

We were meant to be July 11th 2020. Postponed until April 2021. Can’t see it happen. Our venue want an extra £2000 to postpone again until 2022 as they have no dates available for 2021. I just can’t be bothered with the whole thing any more! I feel guilty telling my fiancé how I feel, but I don’t even want a wedding any more. I’d rather just pop down to the registry office and sign the papers. But doing that would upset so many.
Should be the happiest time but it’s really not.

What happens if you don’t pay it? Will you get your money back?

 

[Insta-fan]

Yes they have said I can have a refund if I choose to cancel.

 

[bellinibobble]

Yes they have said I can have a refund if I choose to cancel.

Yikes, if you’ve almost paid up that’s a lot of money, an extra £2k on top seems really unfair. Have they explained the increased costs or given you a breakdown at all?

I know a few people who have been treated quite badly by their venues over the past year. It must be tempting given you can get a full refund to go elsewhere..

 

[Barbie2020]

Our venue have got back to me today and they’ve been pretty helpful to say they don’t know much more than we do.

Up to now we can postpone, hold an extra date just in case we can’t go ahead or wait to see what happens after this lockdown. She also said if we go ahead with a smaller one there will be cheaper options so I feel a bit better.

I am happy with a small wedding but I think my fiancé is really starting to be disappointed about not having a stag and a honeymoon. I completely get that because it’s such a big part of it all.

I’ve told him we will have to decide on what to do but if we want the wedding we were going to have with all the suppliers we want I would say we are going to be waiting 2 years for that so we might start trying for a baby this year and have the wedding after. It’s hard to know what to do.

Hope everyone is doing ok

 

[Charl28]

Our venue have got back to me today and they’ve been pretty helpful to say they don’t know much more than we do.

Up to now we can postpone, hold an extra date just in case we can’t go ahead or wait to see what happens after this lockdown. She also said if we go ahead with a smaller one there will be cheaper options so I feel a bit better.

I am happy with a small wedding but I think my fiancé is really starting to be disappointed about not having a stag and a honeymoon. I completely get that because it’s such a big part of it all.

I’ve told him we will have to decide on what to do but if we want the wedding we were going to have with all the suppliers we want I would say we are going to be waiting 2 years for that so we might start trying for a baby this year and have the wedding after. It’s hard to know what to do.

Hope everyone is doing ok

When are you due to get married? When we’re your stag and hen dos xx

 

[nbt]

Our venue have got back to me today and they’ve been pretty helpful to say they don’t know much more than we do.

Up to now we can postpone, hold an extra date just in case we can’t go ahead or wait to see what happens after this lockdown. She also said if we go ahead with a smaller one there will be cheaper options so I feel a bit better.

I am happy with a small wedding but I think my fiancé is really starting to be disappointed about not having a stag and a honeymoon. I completely get that because it’s such a big part of it all.

I’ve told him we will have to decide on what to do but if we want the wedding we were going to have with all the suppliers we want I would say we are going to be waiting 2 years for that so we might start trying for a baby this year and have the wedding after. It’s hard to know what to do.

Hope everyone is doing ok

Sounds like a good response and hopefully has helped ease your worries a little. It’s hard to make a choice though when you’ve had your mind set on something!

We’re in talks with our venue too and have confirmed that we’d like to cancel our wedding. Now to have the talk about how much money we’re getting back...

 

[Barbie2020]

Sounds like a good response and hopefully has helped ease your worries a little. It’s hard to make a choice though when you’ve had your mind set on something!

We’re in talks with our venue too and have confirmed that we’d like to cancel our wedding. Now to have the talk about how much money we’re getting back...

Ah I’m really sorry you’re having to cancel. I know whatever you choose to do instead will be lovely and perfect to you. I am a believer in everything working out for the best but I know it’s still hard to cancel the one you had planned

When are you due to get married? When we’re your stag and hen dos xx

June 19th. Hen and stags were going to be around April/may time. I was only going to have a day do so hopefully by that time we’d be maybe be able to go and have a meal and a few cocktails. My partner is disappointed because he wanted a big city break type stag. I’m hoping if things improve he might be able to get something like that maybe even a couple of weeks before the wedding

 

[Charl28]

Ah I’m really sorry you’re having to cancel. I know whatever you choose to do instead will be lovely and perfect to you. I am a believer in everything working out for the best but I know it’s still hard to cancel the one you had planned



June 19th. Hen and stags were going to be around April/may time. I was only going to have a day do so hopefully by that time we’d be maybe be able to go and have a meal and a few cocktails. My partner is disappointed because he wanted a big city break type stag. I’m hoping if things improve he might be able to get something like that maybe even a couple of weeks before the wedding

Aw I’m hoping you get to atleast do something for your hens n stag do hopefully can meet up with a few friends & do something... I’m meant to have a hen in Marbella in May not sure that will be going ahead x

 

[Tots]

@Charl28