bowelbabe : Most liked Posts

Feck. When did this thread become nurses v GPS. Probably neither have any comprehension of what the other does but well done for blaming each other rather than the chronic underfunding of the NHS!

Basically - it’s now down to who shouts the loudest as to who gets the best treatment. And there we see BB and her pushy mum. Also - her brother is the most average looking man I’ve ever seen butBB making out he’s super popular. They all have a bizarre concept of their own beauty.

vix68 said:

I know it’s off topic but when my husband left I had to take 2 weeks off work as I was just devastated. all I wanted to do was be with my parents. I would drop my son at school and drive straight to mum and dads. I needed comfort and it was at my parents. I was like the child again. I think she’s at home with her family and that family is her husband, kids and her parents. I can understand why she’s at her mums as she needs looking after. If they were all at hers she would think she needs to act as hostess and she is just not capable of that at the moment. As much as I can’t stand her, my heart goes out to her as I just can’t see her recovering from this. That tumour is around her bile duct with only a stent to keep it open. I just don’t know how she’s coping with it all. It’s just such a terrible situation. It wouldn’t surprise me if soonish she will just think enough is enough and I just want to go now. Sorry to be doom and gloom. BTW I’ve been with a lovely fella for 6 years and never been happier but boy did I need my mum and dad through the worst period of my life.

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I think realistically she hasn't got much longer now, whether she pursues more treatment or not. It's absolutely heartbreaking regardless of what any of us may think of her, she doesn't deserve this and it's so desperately sad for her young family. It feels deeply uncomfortable being a voyeur in the last phase of her life like this. I know it is the path she has chosen but I guess it goes against human nature to be so involved in what is ultimately, a stranger's death. All I can say at this point really is I hope she gets as much quality time as possible and that she is as comfortable as can be expected. Cancer is truly, truly evil and I am so sorry to all of you who have experienced it. The world can be so cruel.

The latest Bowel Gran vid makes me cringe, I'm afraid. This is one weird family. Parents are recreating....badly...a scene from Grease in their garden, their grandson is having his teeth flashed all over Insta, ill daughter is advertising make-up from hospital. I mean...I feel as if I have entered a parallel universe.

I am 6 years younger than Deborah. Diagnosed one month before her. Similar diagnosis. I asked her to share…to share my fundraising page as I was running the marathon dressed as in 2018 and she refused. She refused to share a fellow bowel cancers fundraising page despite her huge platform. It made no sense to me and disheartened me back into never sharing with others. I think her page, blog and podcast are harmful beyond repair. I certainly wouldn’t follow her if I was in the midst of treatment.
I hope she recovers well but she has turned cancer into a career and that must be an all consuming identity now…

I don't think BB has said exactly why she's having TPN. My guess would just be that the heavy duty antibiotics, sepsis, past colitis and side effects from treatments have meant that she's not eaten enough or been able to digest food properly for a lot of the past few months but she is still able to eat small amounts, just not enough to start to put on the weight she has lost.

Monique is on TPN because her bowel is obstructed. That's why she has the NG tube. It's not to put feeds down but to empty out the bile from her stomach because otherwise it builds up and makes her vomit. She has said that she can only have liquids or foods like chocolate that melt because it needs to be able to pass back up through the tube. The eating/drinking is only really for pleasure and to stop her mouth and throat being too dry.

Talking about Monique, I'm quite concerned about her at the moment. She hasn't put any updates on for several days since that one from someone else about her taking a turn for the worse after enjoying being out in the sunshine. Not that I think she is obliged to update her followers, but she normally does post if she's feeling up to it so I can only assume she's very unwell right now. I hope she's able to be comfortable and have some time with her loved ones at least because she's had a really rough year.

You don’t have to personally like someone to wish them well/be sad if they die. What a weird flex. Not one single person here won’t have empathy when Deborah sadly passes. It’s called being human.

Karolina1985 said:

I know you won't understand it, because you are all not so keen od Deborah, but I will be devastated when she will die. I'm not a cancer sufferer myself, I was once scrolling on my instagram and Natalie Woodward (@iamnatwoodward) popped on my feed and I thought "oh who is she, she's so pretty". So I started following her and I found out about her bowel cancer and everything that happened to her, still can't comprehend the extensivity of the surgery that she has had. Later through Nat I found Monique and Deborah and that's when my love for BB started. She's just my type of person, I love her energy, I love every silly video that she has made. I was just in awe of her strenght and positivity, I loved that she's all glam on hospital corridors, that's she's dancing to Stayin Alive by Bee Gees in the middle of London streets. I just don't want her to be dead, I want her instagram to go on and be fun and positive for a years to come. I don't why I'm really typing this to you, but I made a promise to myself - I won't follow anymore women with stage IV cancer because you get attached somehow and those people even though they are strangers they will be missed once they're gone.

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You misunderstand us. NONE of us want her dead. When someone chooses to live their life or circumstance through social media they open themselves up to people opinions. I see that she is pretty and full of energy and positiveness but I also see the show off side that I find vulgar. That’s not saying I won’t be sad when she goes. I can see all sides of her and for me part of her personality I am not so keen on. That’s what tattle is all about it’s not a troll forum it’s about people expressing their opinions in a free way. Yes we pick each other up if we’ve stepped over the mark or offended someone but it’s a discussion site where we can express our opinions. We’ve also learned a lot about cancer and end of life care and peoples experiences. This site is not just about singing someone’s praises and wishing they get better soon when someone has terminal cancer, it’s an all round site that we can express positiveness, realism, ask questions and sound off when we get annoyed. Sorry for going on a bit but I too will be sad when she passes as she is so positive and so full of life - but I say it again bloody annoying when she brags

GossipBlue said:

Hubby is a city banker/insurance I think.


Totally agree. I do think over the last 12 months or so she has lost her way slightly with her account. The ads just don’t sit right. It is the amount of ads too that really put me off. It’s seems lately she is nothing but ads thrown in with the odd glass of champagne.

I think she has certainly raised awareness but I do feel this was her secondary goal after raising her own personal profile. Just my view obviously.

The running 5k after “a major op” is also annoying. And please don’t jump on and say some people do this as their way of coping. There is no way Anyone could run 5k after a major op. Just don’t believe it.

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I have had a few conversations with Deborah over the years as my brother had metastatic bowel cancer and we discussed her treatments - there's no way my brother would have been able to jog/run to get his treatments
sadly my brother died 2 years ago and didn't have access to the numerous treatment options/ access to clinical trials she has been able to get due to living near the Marsden...unfortunately it's not a level playing field when it comes to cancer and is very much postcode lottery

helenclaireaz said:

So today she is so sad a "friend" has died but quickly moves on to flogging the next free goodies - unbelievably shallow.

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That 'friend' was a 28yr old woman , Hatti Gayner ,who appeared on the BBC dance programme The Greatest Dancer 2 yrs ago with her dance group 'The Queens' ( Cheryl Tweedy/Cole was her group's mentor ...she was an amazing dancer and had a joie de vivre even when dealing with cancer and treatments
Sadly she was diagnosed with breast cancer last August and then diagnosed with metastatic / secondaries in July and only got home from hospital a fortnight ago after having palliative cranial radiotherapy ....the breast cancer community is devastated because she was so young and her symptoms were ignored because of lockdown and her being so young but she advocated for younger women to be taken seriously with their breast cancer concerns
Deborah should show more respect and not promote grabby skin care on her gram today
#checkyourboobies please everyone ( males too) xx

90sGal said:

The advertising products when terminally ill is new isn't it.

Haven't come across it before.

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Funnily enough, just last night i was thinking of another terminally ill woman who was big on Instagram prior to her death. She monetised her illness in a way I've never seen before, in that she used her fame to crowdfund to get her mortgage paid off. She was going to leave three kids behind, two of which were just toddlers, and she wanted them to be secure.

The weirdest thing was, she concealed the fact she had a husband. She just acted like he didn't exist. She would talk about what a struggle she was having, looking after the children, struggling to get out of the house with them etc. She'd talk about her teenage daughter and other relatives helping her. But her kids had a father! I don't think he'd walked out on them (frankly if he had, I think she would have used that to her advantage).

Again, she was seen to be above criticism because she was dying, but I thought it was manipulative bordering on fraudulent. Still, she got the money... £100k+ It just made me SO uncomfortable but I felt like a horror for even questioning her behaviour.

Weeks before she died she was doing an advert for Sky, hooked up to oxygen.

Am I the only one who has noticed it’s largely new members who jump on to defend Deborah? I’m sure most of them are connected to her in some way and I think it’s disingenuous for them not to declare it. I’m inclined to just ignore them.

Look, the truth of it is she is an utter show off without an ounce of humility. I think that is what irks so many of us.

EmilyChambers said:

Or maybe she is just trying to get as much money as she can into the family pot?

It's frightening how many people have no life insurance at a young age and so panic and do as much as they can to ensure their families are taken care off.

It's desperately sad

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She has 80k artwork on the wall. I think they are sorted on that front.

This thread goes round in circles....and sometimes it's filled with pages of people making snap judgments and others saying no one has said that....happens regularly.

No surprise really as the Bowel Babe sure does divide opinion layered with cancer being such an emotive topic.

She is living the truth for herself. And being in the public eye she isn't immune to opinion.

There are ethical questions as we are seeing for the first time such a public display of an illness alongside the marketing side of having your own shop window as an IG page.

I've been here for a short while and haven't ever seen anyone be rude about her or "troll" her. In fact I think we always seem to have a healthy debate. We don't always agree but we are entitled to an opinion. It is a discussion site after all.

The trolls I am assuming she has referred to are direct messages, which whatever side of the fence you sit on with her I am sure we all agree are vile.

It's good to discuss things, we can learn, and figure stuff out. We can challenge ourselves and we can also have our own opinions confirmed.

I suppose I am trying to say the forum won't disappear, that is I am assuming it breaks rules.

BB isn't upfront about her private health care
BB will continue to sell stuff even when admitted into hospital and poorly
Her reality isn't our own.

And in those final three points it gives us something to ponder and discuss.

Ivegotatheory said:

That’s all you’ve got? Stop pulling apart a terminally ill woman’s life.

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No one on this thread is pulling apart a terminally ill woman's life. And if you are reading that into it this thread has clearly either gone over your head or you have failed to read it in its entirely.
I don't think, at this point, ANYONE here wishes any ill on Deborah. Lots of us are suffering similiarly, we are incredibly empathetic of her medical situation.
A few threads ago there were some posts that I personally felt crossed the line around her appearance etc, but this has stopped now and we are, I think, having a relatively calm and reasoned debate about the moral and ethics of advertising while terminally ill as well as a really useful and nuanced discussion about the end of life. Something that society has shyed away from talking about for too long, to our detriment.
If this is too much for you, I'd suggest stepping away from this thread. It's helping a lot of us in similiar situations to Bowel Babe think differently about our situation.
There are many threads on TL that I do find overly nasty and vitriolic. But this isn't one.

Is it me being completely cynical, or is Bowel Babe purposefully not posting and in a few days we are going to get a 'been a rough few days/near death experience' and a whole sob story but she BOUNCED BACK. Because she has commented on Miques post so is obviously 'doing' social media. I feel like she is playing for effect

She deserves an award just for fitting in so many ads amongst that update.

Please report to add a title.

Let's not argue with each other, be respectful of everyone and agree to disagree

Jvuddie said:

Christ, thought BB's stories couldn't get any worse and up pops Lorraine kelly.

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I cannot bear Lorraine Kelly . She’s a self serving hasbeen. She would do better filming the real state of cancer treatment in the UK, go and see Monique.

avabella said:

My take is gross? I'm not implying she's a nice person because she's fragile - that's what this whole thread has done. Praised Monique for her attitude on approaching her death whilst slagging off Deborah for her take on it. And the bottom line is, it's nothing to do with any one of us - there is no textbook, that is what I am getting at.

It's not a competition of who is approaching death 'properly', but reading this thread makes it seem Deborah is doing it 'wrongly' and should be more like Monique. If she has the means to use £500 face creams, more power to her! I'm not jealous of a dying woman using an expensive face cream ffs, nor would I grudge her that.

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The fact that you can’t understand their her being a lovely person has NOTHING to do with her illness is the problem. In the same way Deborah not coming across very well has nothing to do with hers. Deborah exploits her illness for financial gain, so people are very much entitled to have an opinion, wether she is dying or otherwise.

Im honestly sick of hearing this crap about us expecting her to die in a certain way. As everyone has said from the start, she can do what she wants - as she does. But if you choose to put yourself on social media, people will talk and rightly so. She is graphically dying before our very eyes and still chooses to flog some shit anti aging facecream or exercise leggings from a sickbed. Most of us won’t ever understand that, doesn’t change the fact that she will do it or mean that we are right and she is wrong. It’s just life. That doesn’t mean we don’t have sympathy for her illness. No one is jealous of her. What a baffling thing to say honestly, you are completely missing the point. It’s not about being envious of freebies.

Monique - very personable, Deborah - not. Neither a bad person, neither deserves the position they are in. BOTH heartbreaking but not both relatable in their approaches.