Thanks for being so patient with me trying to formulate a response. Work got on top of me.
So to answer "What can white allies do on social media and off"?
1. Start conversations with your fellow white people (especially the ones who are not allies yet)
- Don't wait for black people to start the conversation constantly, this is a relay race so we are passing the baton as honestly, we are tired.
- These conversations can be about on current affairs happening within black communities such as George Floyd and grow from there.
- Raise unconscious bias questions such as have you ever questioned being in a room just filled with white people, your interactions with police, your position on dating outside your race, assumptions you have made about other races in the past?
- It is perfectly OK if you have changed your initial stance on these bias, but by starting the conversation with other white people you can make them aware of things they may never have thought to question. (For example, my friend put forward the question for her white followers to note how many other races were in the room at team meetings, something they had never questioned, yet after than initial conversation it made them rethink) - in the current climate, you could alter this as how many other races do you follow on your socials? Some people will be shocked.
2. Embrace the Uncomfortable
- You all saw the interaction here on Tattle when I made a clear point and instead of the responder understanding, a poorly formed Snickers joke was made -- and that is because of white fragility which makes white people uncomfortable so instead of trying to understand - jokes are cracked, the subject is changed, defensive go up, disagreeing without understanding and the final nail "All Lives Matter" is uttered.
- As I said you have to feel uncomfortable because that is a small margin in comparison to what black people deal with.
- Question
"why do I feel this way"? - investigate those emotions that make you uncomfortable instead of shutting them down.
2. Unlearn the rhetoric: "I don't see Color"
- Wild right?
- Some white allies I know use to think some of the things they said were socially acceptable, but really they were overtly racist statements e.g. "I don't see color" -- unlearn that.
- Don't be scared to say black because if you have two Debbies are one is black, just say it because you can definitely see her colour and that is a part of her.
- So yes you see color - because if you don't you are not seeing your black friends, family, coworkers and you don't see the unequal infrastructure and injustice.
- Jane Elliot (one of my fav white allies) spoke about this
here (I would implore you to watch the whole video, but 9.44 is where she begins the conversation), also check out her experiment called "How Racist Are You" on brown and blue eyes she did in the UK on Channel 4 a few years ago
here.
3. Use resources, not just black people
- After unlearning you have to relearn and although it's great to have these conversations, black people are exhausted so we can't always be the go-to. So books, films and Google are great resources.
- As I once said to my friend
"you cannot say you are well-read, when every book you read is by a white author"
- Join a book club and bring that book as your choice to discuss further
- By reading and watching various sources, you become less of an echo chamber with similar people, you get an insight into issues you may not have known about or known how to approach
- Learn slowly and intentional, not just for the sake of learning
Some of my recommended are:
Books:
- The New Jim Crow - Michelle Alexander
- Why I am No Longer Talking to White People About Race - Reni Eddo-Lodge
- The Good Immigrant - Nikesh Shukla
- Brit(ish) - Afua Hirsch
- So You Want To Talk About Race - Ijeoma Oluo
- Natives - Akala
- Tears We Cannot Stop - Michael Eric Dyson
- They Can't Kill Us All - Wesley Lowery
- White Fragility - Robin DiAngelo
- Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria? - Beverly Daniel Tatum
- White Rage - Carol Anderson
Films
- When They See Us
- If Beale Street Could Talk
- The Hate U Give
- Dear White People
- Selma
- The Color Purple
- Hidden Figures
- Sidenote: I do not recommend things I have not read or watched myself, so this is a personal list
3. Curate diverse social medias
- This will help keep you informed and out of the echo chamber.
- With diverse, share and comment on these activists posts. Ask questions so you are constantly learning (plus it allows others who may come across the post and have the same question, have a better understanding)
This way you can also help boost the voices of black people and be aware of what is going on when you receive backlash (because trust me you will, not everyone wants a fairer society and you realise that via social media). This will give you a platform to denounce things if you don't racism wins.
- Use your feed to not only like and learn, but speak out, as MLK Jr said
"to ignore evil is to become an accomplice to it"
3. Accept your white privilege
- I know many who hate the term, roll their eyes and scoff but its a necessity to accept and acknowledge.
- It also takes a lot of introspectiveness from white people and again can be uncomfortable unpacking these conversations.
- Remember white privilege is not saying you haven't had a hard life or invaliding that, it just notes your skin colour did not add to it
- Use your privilege for good in many of the ways listed in this post - if you have children teach them about this, the younger the better
- If you constantly fight against this, I am sorry but you can never truly be an ally with your eyes shut whilst benefiting from a system that consistently fails black people.
4. Financially help
- There are great organisations out there such as ROTA, Race Equality Foundation, NAACP, Color of Change.
- If that's not possible sign petitions, AND keep the conversation alive. Share it between friends and talk about why you are sharing it.
- As noted, I said not to use black people you know as your go-to Google, but if you have events, workshops, programmes on race and know someone who could contribute and earn from this - ask them. You get to play a part in financially helping and also spreading knowledge.
4. Call them Out!
- That's right - call out your problematic friends, family members etc,
"Silence in the face of injustice is complicity with the oppressor"
- Call out your councillors, MPs, Mayors via email, letter - step on their necks and make them feel the pressure!
- To be a good ally, we need to see you doing the work!
- It is no longer enough to say
"I'm not racist", you have to show your anti-racism through your actions.
Lastly, this is life long work, and now you can understand why black people are tired. So as a white ally, you need to daily acknowledge your own racial bias and commit to dismantling it within.
This movement cannot be led solely by black people. If we want real change, we need real allyship.
Thanks for reading this, the last couple days have been extremely tough - this really pushed my buttons as my brother was killed due to police brutality (why I left NYC and came back to the UK), but the white allies I had made after has truly shown me change can happen if people are willing to acknowledge and work for it.
