@lurkingaround123 Might be clash of values. I suppose they did grow up in a time when you were supposed to be deferential to people older than you. I highly doubt many were though! And for those who were, much of it was probably fake and because they feared punishment. I much prefer treating everyone equally regardless.
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I’m afraid I’m turning into my mother and saying a loud “thank you” when things like this happen. It’s worth it for the confusion on their faces as they try and work out whether it’s a criticism or a compliment.
We were schooled to be polite children, we’d be expected to move out of the way of adults on the pavement or be mindful of other people. Also to give up a seat on public transport to someone who needed it more. It seems a lot of parents nowadays instil in their children a sense of entitlement and ownership of any space they’re in.
Likewise going out to eat at a restaurant was considered a special treat and we would be on our best behaviour. Some of the scenes I’ve witnessed with families beggars belief - when I was a waitress we had a family with a child who spent the meal throwing food on the floor, at the walls, launching peas at other diners, wrapping the table number in a napkin then pouring gravy on it. The parents did absolutely nothing to stop his behaviour and even rewarded him with a dessert. They didn’t apologise when we came to the table and clocked the mess, and they left zero tip. I’d have loved to scrape their plates onto the windscreen and bonnet of their car!
My daughter tells me the same from her waitressing days...word for word.
She also worked in a well known cocktail bar chain, the customers that were the most obnoxious were 'mother of the bride'...the bride just wanted a good time but the mother seemed over entitled to special treatment and would treat the staff with contempt.
Parents who let their kids get food all over the floor in cafes and restaurants, and then walk off leaving a total tit pit really wind me up. I have a kid who is high chair age, we wipe the high chair and clean up any dropped food if we go out, as we would at home. People who are absolutely disgusting when in public really make me wonder what they are like at home. Just so entitled and ignorant.
I can't remember where I saw it now but I saw a sign in a shop telling customers to put down their phones while at the checkout. It was politely phrased, I can't remember the exact words. It's a shame that people have to be told such a basic thing.I really wish we could refuse to serve customers on the phone
My other favourite is almost getting knocked over by a feral kid running loose, or tearing along on a bike or scooter.
And the parent says, oh are you okay darling to the feral child... as though I am the one at fault.
Bad manners is one of my pet peeves! I've recently started managing a team for the first time and I'm so overly conscious of saying please and thank you when I set them tasks.
Slightly related thing that bothers me is when someone calls you at work, you say hello and ask if they're okay and they're like "yeah not bad" and then just launch into what they called about. Reciprocate my pleasantry and ask how I am, wanker!
Same with writing "hope you're well?" at the start of an email and the respondent just ignores it in their reply. I don't really give a duck how you are and I'll only ever respond "fine thanks" if you ask me, just show some common courtesy.
Slightly related thing that bothers me is when someone calls you at work, you say hello and ask if they're okay and they're like "yeah not bad" and then just launch into what they called about. Reciprocate my pleasantry and ask how I am, wanker!
Same with writing "hope you're well?" at the start of an email and the respondent just ignores it in their reply. I don't really give a duck how you are and I'll only ever respond "fine thanks" if you ask me, just show some common courtesy.
Oops I've done this as up til now I assumed it was rhetorical. We don't use that phrase where I am. Youtubers say it a lot and I've always found it weird.
There’s definitely a lack of manners these days. I blame tiktok culture etc where people scream lectures at the camera - Social justice warriors who scream in your face, etc, they see general members of the public as boomers, bigots etc. I find the social media generation approach things with very much a “thou shalt believe the same as me else you are all unintelligent scum” school of thought. Polite and balanced debate seems a thing of the past; now you see rude aggressive attempts to lecture people on the latest fashionable cause.
Also, I’ve noticed people hardly say thanks for doors being held open in public.
Also, I’ve noticed people hardly say thanks for doors being held open in public.
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Definitely! I've found that many have a very entitled attitude. Don't even get me started on "respect your elders", respect is a two way street
I'm rural which is why I think I've not experienced it, life isn't stressful in the way a town or city can be and people have to interact with each other repeatedly, so you're definitely mindful of what and how you say something and what you do. I hope I don't have to start dealing with this! I'm so sensitive. What's the best way to deal with people like this? Tips?
If you're from Cardiff like me you'll know the famous words "cheers drive" saved for bus and taxi drivers since...we had wheels
I always thank the bus driver but I am known for saying please and thank you for pretty much everything. I've always been like this and I've had colleagues tell me to stop thanking them all the time but I would hate to unintentionally be rude.
I've noticed when you do help others in supermarkets or in public it is very rare you get a thank you. Earlier on I told someone the ATM was not working and there was a Post Office a minute away and he looked at me like he wanted to knock me out.
I can't stand people who can't say please and thank you.
My 9 year old brother has better manners than some grown ups!
I've noticed when you do help others in supermarkets or in public it is very rare you get a thank you. Earlier on I told someone the ATM was not working and there was a Post Office a minute away and he looked at me like he wanted to knock me out.
I can't stand people who can't say please and thank you.
My 9 year old brother has better manners than some grown ups!
We say that in the West Country tooIf you're from Cardiff like me you'll know the famous words "cheers drive" saved for bus and taxi drivers since...we had wheels
I live in the North East and most people are still reasonably polite. I did let the door close on a man the other day as the rude git didn't thank me for holding the previous door open for him. My husband said it basically slammed on his stomach.
I can not help myself at times, if someone doesn't thank me for holding the door I have to say with pure sarcasm "you're welcome".
I can not help myself at times, if someone doesn't thank me for holding the door I have to say with pure sarcasm "you're welcome".
I have been known to thank a cashpoint before now!
They are pretty bad surprising as they were the generation that were brought up with good manners. Whether old age has made them entitled perhaps. Then again I am 64 and polite. Mi
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I find a lot of young children also have no manners nowadays. So many young kids snatching, pushing, barging in and not saying please or thank you. There’s definitely an entitled generation being raised.
I’ve also found old people rude though, I had two separate occasions were old men came into my workplace (retail) and asked whether or not I was too stupid to go uni and if that’s why I worked there… (I actually have a degree!)
Honestly I go out my way to avoid social interaction because I’ve had so many bad experiences.
I’ve also found old people rude though, I had two separate occasions were old men came into my workplace (retail) and asked whether or not I was too stupid to go uni and if that’s why I worked there… (I actually have a degree!)
Honestly I go out my way to avoid social interaction because I’ve had so many bad experiences.
Manners cost nothing.
I remember once using a cash machine while an elderly man was stood behind me, it wasn't releasing money so I told him rather than making him wait any longer and he told me to mind my own business. My biggest peeve is when you wait what seems like ages for another driver to come through and they don't raise their hand to say thank you. I often find myself shouting thank you out the window, followed by you're welcome. It winds me up. Its not hard to say thank you or even acknowledge something.
I remember once using a cash machine while an elderly man was stood behind me, it wasn't releasing money so I told him rather than making him wait any longer and he told me to mind my own business. My biggest peeve is when you wait what seems like ages for another driver to come through and they don't raise their hand to say thank you. I often find myself shouting thank you out the window, followed by you're welcome. It winds me up. Its not hard to say thank you or even acknowledge something.
Tell me about it!
I walked into a pub today, because I needed a drink and to use the facilaties. I waited to be acknowledged by a woman in front of the bar, chatting to customers, I think she was the landlady. There was a barmaid pouring a glass of wine for someone, I accept the she was busy, but she could have at least acknowledged me.
The landlady continued chatting to customers, I didn't get the chance to speak up, because my pressence wasn't acknowledged.
So I walked out.
I walked into a pub today, because I needed a drink and to use the facilaties. I waited to be acknowledged by a woman in front of the bar, chatting to customers, I think she was the landlady. There was a barmaid pouring a glass of wine for someone, I accept the she was busy, but she could have at least acknowledged me.
The landlady continued chatting to customers, I didn't get the chance to speak up, because my pressence wasn't acknowledged.
So I walked out.
What is with people constantly chatting at work now? I was at a self-serve checkout the other day which was having a hissy-fit as they do, and the two ladies there who are meant to keep an eye on things were just chatting away with their backs to the registers. I just stood there, waiting to see how long it would take for them to notice that the self-serve wasn't working for me and do their job.
And they're just standing there. Chatting away. At least turn around and face the customers so you can go and help people when they need it!
I'd get hauled into the office and reprimanded if I had done that at my old retail job.
I worked in a small shop when they introduced the mandatory mask wearing. It was the first day of it and the rules the government laid out where you didn't have to wear the mask if you were behind the counter behind the glass.
A man came in and was so viscous with me speaking really sharp and angry going wheres your mask. I was light and said you don't need one behind the glass and he actually stood there gawping and intimidating me.
I totally get it if I wasn't following the rules but there was no need for the intimidation. The whole pandemic really opened my eyes to how childish, rude and selfish people can be. I always smile at shop staff/ waiters etc and have manners they put up with some horrid people!
A man came in and was so viscous with me speaking really sharp and angry going wheres your mask. I was light and said you don't need one behind the glass and he actually stood there gawping and intimidating me.
I totally get it if I wasn't following the rules but there was no need for the intimidation. The whole pandemic really opened my eyes to how childish, rude and selfish people can be. I always smile at shop staff/ waiters etc and have manners they put up with some horrid people!