What is the pettiest thing you've ever done?

[shadowcat5]

once again, not me but thought it was hilarious

 

[Glittergirlie]

I am a receptionist /admin person in a busy car garage. A nob head entitled mechanic who does bike riding/racing? for his hobby (I don't have to do any work whatsoever for him) He came in one morning.. Threw a award certificate which he won on my desk saying 'laminate that babe!' no please/do you mind etc.I said no! bloody do it yourself and I am not your babe! He asked how to do it so I said feed it into the gray machine on the floor... So he did.... Shreaded!

 

[DanaScully]

Years ago, a lad we were friendly with asked me for my number in the pub. I didn't give it to him but someone else apparently did and he bombarded me with texts asking to take me out.

I was a closeted lesbian at the time so tried to politely tell him thanks, but no thanks. I wasn't in any way rude to him but my rejection must have damaged his fragile ego.

A few weeks later we were at the pub and bumped into him and his pals. He was clearly upset with me and called me a racial slur. Everyone at the pub kicked off on him and there was a huge row about it.

After that night I didn't see him for years until he came into the café I was working at with his girlfriend. I didn't acknowledge I knew him and was nice as pie, took their order and prepared their food as usual. When I put his plate down I looked him in the eye with a wry smile and said, "Hope you enjoy your food!".

I watched him hesitantly start eating and he looked so uncomfortable the whole time he was there, checking every forkful before he put it in his mouth. I didn't do anything to his food but the fact he was clearly worried I had and didn't enjoy it was all the petty revenge I needed.

 

[Umbridge]

Ex left owing me a load of money he couldnt repay as he was skint, but he wanted to pick up his passport to take the woman he cheated with on holiday.

I very carefully removed the photo page and gave it back. Thick fuck didnt notice until he got to check in, and still hasnt worked out what happened.

 

[Hastaggifted]

Someone beeped at me to move from my parking space in Tesco when I'd only just got into my car. I went back inside. Smiled at him as I did so .

 

[Itsmedoctortea]

Mr tea and I regularly argue over picking films, sad I know, but the other night he picked the most god awful movie I don't even think he liked it but he pretended to be into it just to grate me, anyways he got up to go to the bathroom and paused it but i fast forwarded to about 5 mins from the end and hit pause again so when he came back in he watched the last 5 mins then credits rolled and he didn't even notice he missed about 35 mins of it proceeded to say 'that was alright'

 

[shadowcat5]

not me but thought you lot would appreciate

 

[bubbadabut]

A place I used to work had a barber opposite it, that had a big sign that said

OPEN MONDAY'S

and it always annoyed me. One day I pointed it out to the proprietress, and she insisted that OPEN MONDAY'S was fine. When I pointed out where she was wrong, she went apeshit, saying that I obviously didn't know what the fuck I was on about, and to shut my face.

So, I had a copy of Eats, Shoots & Leaves sent to her shop, and unfortunately I screwed up on postage and she ended up getting stung for £1.79. She moaned and cried about this for a week, so eventually I posted her £1.79 in pennies.

But OPEN MONDAY'S continued to haunt me.

Eventually, after some font research, I replaced her OPEN MONDAY'S sign with a practically identical OPEN MONDAYS. After two weeks she noticed, and again, went apeshit. Insisted on the replacement of her original sign. So I gave her a nice O'PEN M'ONDAY'S' sign, which she did not appreciate. The police were summoned. I have a lifetime ban from her establishment.

I think I love you.

When grammar pedantry and coinage pettiness collide. Simply priceless.

 

[PrincessCharming]

I took a bite out of a sandwich too!

It was an M&S packaged one and Laura, who was a complete cunt, put a yellow sticky on it saying “Laura’s Hands Off!!!!!!”. There was no history of food going missing from the office fridge.

I took a large bite out of both sarnies and carefully replaced them.

Another cuntyballs I worked with was leaving and the collection envelope landed on my desk. I took a withdrawal rather than depositing and very much enjoyed my free lunch that day!

 

[sassmaster3000]

I was a pedestrian waiting to cross the road at a traffic light and a driver ran the red light just as I was about to step in front of his car. He was really weird and gave me a smug/smarmy face as he drove past?
I was in a particularly petty mood that day. So I noted his reg plate in my head and googled it when i got home.
Found out he was driving whilst uninsured, so I reported it to the police. I have no idea if he got done for driving without insurance but the police suddenly sounded very interested once they typed his plates into their system...

 

[Happyvalley]

When someone requests a read receipt for their email I always like to click no when it asks if I want to send a receipt…just to be petty cos the asking for a receipt just annoys me!

 

[soymilk]

when I worked in a bar abroad, I had a customer who was extremely rude; clicking her fingers for attention, not saying please or thank you and speaking to me like I was her servant so when I delivered her table a round of drinks and she paid, I deliberately let the change miss her hand and drop on the floor so she had to pick it up as I walked off

 

[neapsntatties]

A girl in my work (we’ll call her Moira) has been constantly talking about me behind my back, blaming me for when she does things wrong. Little does she know that I know all of this as one of the people she bitches to tells me. She talks so nice to my face and sucks up my arse and one day I snapped. She now claims she hates me. I remembered one time she told me how one of her friends she went on holiday with ordered the same outfit as her and took it on holiday to ‘match’ which made Moira angry. So I used my detective skills to find out what she’s wearing to our Christmas night out tomorrow and ordered it… Can not wait to see her face when I walk in (thankfully the dress is decent)

 

[Jen667]

Padlocked our wheelie bin. Our neighbour doesn't like wheelie bins, thinks they ruin the aesthetic of the neighbourhood and doesn't have one. Fine, her choice. But she tries to slip her rubbish into ours when she thinks we're not looking. Not any more lady.

 

[Taythomlau]

When I used to work in Greggs, if a customer was rude, I'd be heavy handed with the tongues picking up the pasty and give them the coldest one!

 

[WeHadFunRight]

In Tesco a tween was being really pushy and bolshy when I was looking at the sandwiches, she told her friend the only sandwich she likes is chicken and stuffing, on hearing this I spotted that there was only one chicken and stuffing sandwich left, so I grabbed it. Her face was an ABSOLUTE picture I will never forget. I don’t really like chicken and stuffing sandwiches but that one really tasted great that day.

 

[under the ivy]

Keyed my ex’s Jaguar after I’d met him in a beer garden to talk. No regrets.

 

[Averagejoex]

I worked in a dentist and they had monthly staff meetings where they would order everyone lunch and have a meeting over lunch time. I handed in my notice a week before the monthly meeting. I wasn’t going to a rival or anything I was actually moving abroad. I was told I was no longer allowed to be part of the meeting. They ordered everyone lunch except me and made me sit downstairs alone for the hour they had they meeting. I took £5 out the till to get myself Greggs. I was adamant that they were in fact going to buy me fucking lunch

 

[soymilk]

when I was a teenager I bought these sequin hotpants from Topshop that I was "saving" to wear. My sister (who was at uni at the time) took them (without asking) and when she gave them back to me they'd been stretched and weren't looking the best. I was fuming, so I went on facebook and every picture she'd been tagged in/uploaded wearing them, I commented on saying: "you look shit".

 

[Ruby’s mum]

Someone I know, after being cheated on then dumped, wrote ‘bastard’ on her ex’s lawn in weed killer. She also kept a key to his house and when she knew he would be away for a few days let herself in, changed the fuse in the plug on his freezer for an old broken fuse and left the contents to defrost. It was so satisfying