Wedding planning

[101d]

We're all in similar situations! One of my best friends told me she doesn't want any responsibility/role in the wedding, as I was telling her I'd like to be a bridesmaid Still gonna ask her, hopefully she doesn't kick up a fuss!

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

I’m paying for my maid of honour’s hair & makeup, dress & hotel room for the night before. She’s on benefits, is disabled & has a baby.
My other bridesmaid is my SIL to be, I’ll be paying her for dress. She wants to pay for the hotel room & hair & makeup, but I’d be happy to pay for those if she wanted.

the only things they’ll need to sort themselves if they want to have them are jewellery, nails & similar accessories. They’ll also be sorting their own shoes.

it’s a very unique thing and it all depends on budgets.

 

[Holidaybobs]

This sounds amazing! OT but where did you see the northern lights? Seeing them in Iceland was the best night of my life, I was hoping for a proposal but it came seven months later

We went to Finnish Lapland. It was absolutely incredible, I was happy enough with that then turned around and he was on one knee, I thought he had fell at first

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

Rings and suits are the next things on our list I think.

Sadly my fiancé’s grandad passed away a few weeks ago, which is hard because he is one of the people we really wanted to be at the wedding as we knew it would probably be the only chance he would get to see a grandchild get married

My nan also passed away a few months ago, but she had advanced dementia, so she wouldn’t have been able to attend, but it’s still difficult

Not many people agree with the “big” wedding, although I wouldn’t say ours was overly big? We are having 28 to the day (getting married in a hotel, followed by wedding breakfast there) and then there’s about 60-80 in total at the evening (reception is at the hotel too).

I guess we just preferred this choice of wedding style as we wanted to enjoy the day with all our family and friends. I can’t say I’ve felt stressed about it up to now, we are both very laid back and it’s all been fairly easy so far!

 

[Begborrowsteal]

I personally wouldn’t mind buying a bridesmaid dress and paying for my hair and makeup, I know weddings are expensive. But I’d only do it if it’s a dress I liked and would probably wear again

I’ve always paid for my own dresses, I didn’t realise the bride and groom pay for them

Typically the bride would cover all costs for bridedmaids. If you can afford it/youre very particular then do so but I dont think its unreasonable to ask bridesmaids to get a dress or if they want make up done to pay for it. You just cant dictate what theyre wearing then if youre not paying. Expecting people to front up £250 is massively taking the piss! At least make it reasonable/affordable for the girls

My BMs have colour to choose from but they have free choice what style. I mean, theyre getting cheap dresses off amazon im not picky

 

[Begborrowsteal]

Some people are just nasty! If they don’t have anything nice to say, they shouldn’t say anything at all! We have a subtle Mickey & Minnie theme to ours.

people keep saying to me (people from work or people who aren’t close to me and don’t know me personally) that there’s no point in getting married because it just ends in divorce and that it’s all a waste of money . It’s so rude and bitter, I wasn’t very happy growing up & alls I want is to enjoy my bit of happiness without people dragging me down!

People and their opinions! I don't know why they feel the need to voice them all

 

[nycinthesun]

Hi everyone. Been engaged to my OH for a long time and we’ve finally decided to think about planning a wedding. We don’t want anything big, fancy or mega expensive but would like it to be a nice day obviously. Im nervous about doing the ceremony in front of others as I hate public speaking, don’t want to be walked down the aisle as without going into detail, my family is sort of complicated and who ever I chose it would end up making things awkward or upsetting someone so I’d rather avoid it altogether and maybe have our kids in tow instead as flower girl/page boy. Neither of us fancy doing the traditional first dance at the reception either, we’re not really dancey sort of people and the idea makes us both cringe. Im just wondering if anyone else has picked and chose which traditions they partake in and which ones they disregard and how it went? Did anyone comment negatively or try to persuade you otherwise? Not that it matters what others think, just curious.

We want to get married but we want to do it our way and don’t want to do things that make us uncomfortable for the sake of tradition. I’m currently just browsing venues and stuff on hitched and getting a feel for the kind of prices we will be looking at. We want to keep things pretty simple and uncomplicated if that is even possible with a wedding. Anyway I look forward to catching up with the previous posts and reading everyone’s experiences!

I hope you get the wedding you want! I've heard so many amazing responses from people who attended (or didn't attend but are friends with the newlyweds) the wedding of a couple who did things completely their way. It makes for a more personal occasion. I had a couple of friends who ended up eloping because covid threw a wrench into their original wedding plans and I was so happy that they go to do something so exciting and intimate and beautiful without having to deal with anyone's input or following traditions they didn't believe in.

 

[shhh1712]

We are getting married in Spain and it’s coming in about £18k currently. We are putting money aside each month and we may need to do that for a couple of months after the wedding too but I’m not too worried as we are having a holiday with it too and have stuff planned.
We haven’t got a honeymoon booked or budgeted for that, we will just see what we are left with after the wedding and go from there

 

[Rbarb-bkini]

My wedding is in March, I realised I have 7 weekends before the wedding - made me feel sick

Our original date was Feb 2021 so I literally booked all of my suppliers back in 2020, bought bridesmaid dresses and my dress, all of that, and then in Nov 2020 we made the decision to postpone and I just left everything for nearly a year - I got really sad and lost all steam for the planning and think I maybe left it longer than I should have as suddenly it feels like a lot to do.

Just on the what traditions we are keeping/leaving out talk:
- I am still having my dad walk me down the aisle however I am not having the "Who gives this woman to this man" shtick in the ceremony because my partner is not getting a dowry and a goat
- I have shown my partner my dress. I got a lot of family members shocked at me for doing this but I'm really not bothered! And my partner's memory is shocking sooo...
-I so agree with comfy shoes! I have Doc Marten style off-white boots for mine with satin laces
- We are having a first dance, mainly on my request as he hates dancing, but we are only doing it for 20 seconds before inviting guests up. Not picked music yet though that is imminent!
- No removing the garter/bouquet toss - hate both, I think these have really died down as traditions now anyway!
- Similarly I'm also not opposed to if we see/speak to each other before the ceremony
- We are also serving our wedding cake as dessert so the cutting will be early and we can make sure everyone enjoys the cake! (This is mainly because the venue scaled back the package to a 2 course meal for 2022 weddings and for some reason didn't feel the need to honour the original 2021 package we booked but whatevs that's minor in the grand scheme)

Main things for us now are finalising menu choices, picking music, final meetings and settling all our bills at end of this month! And I have my hair/mua trial next weekend! Even though I have an extensive spreadsheet I feel like I'm missing something

 

[If i told you …]

My daughter and daughter-in-law are my bridesmaids. These are their dresses.

 

[Lechat]

I’m so sorry. I’m just watching the news (north west tonight) and it’s saying about a fire at a wedding venue… assume this is yours? Devastating. I wonder if any venues nearby might step in to help couples? You never know, I’m sure other venues might want to help as they know the impact it will have on suppliers and couples….

 

[fudgebox]

Our whole wedding is coming in at about £11k. I went over budget on the dress (panic bought right before first lockdown) but other than that I've DIY'd a lot, designed all my own invites, centrepieces etc so I think I've saved on a lot. Our biggest money saving was the venue (winter package).
I think it's all about spending within your means by setting an affordable budget. It can be so difficult when it comes to venue/catering though, prices get silly!
I've heard horror stories about couples paying for their entire weddings on credit cards

Yep we’ve managed to save up for our wedding with 5 months to go! I couldn’t imagine starting married life in so much debt

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

I’m not sure about wedding favours. I might just put personalised sweets & chocolate out.

 

[Holidaybobs]

See my mum said this and I just went fine if people won't come just because I don't invite their kids and they gave to get a babysitter, then they don't care enough anyway. Plus saves me 90 a head then I have very little patience for family members that feel entitled towards my wedding.

See I know some parents who would love a wedding without their children as it gives them a night off! I might be a cold-hearted bitch but, I really don’t care about not inviting family members who are not significant in my life. Thankfully, as we are getting married abroad, we aren’t having a massive wedding. When I get home, I plan on sending some relatives who didn’t come a card with some photos etc

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

I don't see the issue with that, you might be knackered though! I'd give myself the Monday off too lol.

We're getting married on a Monday and I'll be back in office the following Monday. Having a mini-moon in the UK before the proper one a few months later!

I think I’ll be okay, I’ll have all Sunday to rest and i work in an office so I’m sure I’ll be fine! I don’t get much annual leave and our honeymoon is two weeks, so I need to save as much as I can!

We’re getting married on a Friday and will both be back at work on the Monday! We’re having a weekend away the following Friday as our honeymoon isn’t until the next year but other than that it’ll be back to normal

Glad I’m not the only one going back after the weekend, I don’t know why people think it’s so unusual what are we meant to do if we book days off when we aren’t on honeymoon? Sit round our house looking at each other?

 

[Disneylifeonly]

Ours is costing around £15k for Edinburgh for 70 guests
That's for:
Venue which includes food and some drink
Videographer
Photographer
My dress and alterations
Bridesmaid dress
Flowers
Photobooth
Kids corner
Other misc decor items
Invitations
Cake
Favours

 

[101d]

Fun facts for everyone after taking about hen dos
The average cost for a UK hen do is currently between £200-300 per head
And if you're going abroad, a head spinning £800-900 per head

Christ. I wouldn't want to spend that much on a friends hen do so I won't expect them to for mine

 

[Disneylifeonly]

I’m not really having a hen party as such. My bridesmaids are my childhood best friend & my SIL to be.

I’m not really into lots of drinking or anything (I know I sound boring). So we are either going to go for a spa day or we will just go somewhere nice for a meal and a couple of cocktails. Plus my MOH is disabled, as is my mum and as they’re both coming, I can’t do anything strenuous, which is fine by me!

You’ve reminded me of that film “bridesmaids”..: can just imagine people throwing bits of cookie and kicking off

I’ll be honest, I’m way too laid back to stress about the wedding (apart from worrying if covid will cancel it). I’ve never had visions in my head of a “perfect” wedding, weddings aren’t hugely my thing, but I’m doing it to marry my best friend. As long as we get married and we get some nice photos, I’m not too fussed about much else! I know most people would disagree though and I understand it’s very important to some people that every detail is perfect!

Not gonna lie, when my job was organising hen partys, that's what it was like sometimes.
I once had a bride calling, bawling her eyes out, because he friends promised to organise her hen do and it got to the day before and all they had done was book a travel lodge on Newcastle City centre, no activities or anything, just the hotel, because apparently none of them could agree on activities so just decided to not book anything

My idea of hell would be dreamboys or something kind of make stripper show
Or a bar crawl, I just want to do karaoke and have some cocktails

 

[Rippedjeanmaybe]

Can’t believe I’ve been engaged for a year now! We got engaged Christmas Day 2020! And it’s now 9 months until we get married super excited…

 

[shhh1712]

It’s annoying isn’t it! Every time we see her it would be well if this person doesn’t get vaccinated then they can’t come, last time she came round I told my fiancée to tell her not to bring up covid and the wedding as I’m sick of talking about it and her being so negative and moaning.
When it’s your money too it’s nothing to do with her I do feel like some of the older generation perhaps don’t understand, of course it’s entirely up to you what you have at your wedding but there are so many more options nowadays and additional things to have to make it fun or special for guests. Weddings are a lot bigger nowadays!